21 and Married
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28-04-2014, 09:53 PM
RE: 21 and Married
(28-04-2014 12:25 PM)elconquistador Wrote:  Yeah, I know, you probably think the title is crazy but that's me. I absolutely love being married. its the life for me. what was once a choice done through religious furvor it has now been the window to my skeptic awakening. my marriage is pricesless in so many ways. its allowed me to make my own life decisions and leave the church. it's allowed me to move away from family and be autonomous. it's allowed me to experience new and exciting things with my wife and she has helped me be a better person.

anyone else out there young and married? Or perhaps young and living together? What's your financial situation? Ours isn't great, but we get by. how do you improve your living standards?

Those who are married and older, have some wise advise?

(Please, no one suggest the military to me. I cannot join because of medical issues. I'm big in computers and programing, just don't have work doing it yet and I'm still educating myself. )

I got married at 21. Soon we'll be married 26 years. Don't really have any advice tho.


But as if to knock me down, reality came around
And without so much as a mere touch, cut me into little pieces

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29-04-2014, 06:09 AM
RE: 21 and Married
(28-04-2014 12:25 PM)elconquistador Wrote:  anyone else out there young and married? Or perhaps young and living together? What's your financial situation? Ours isn't great, but we get by. how do you improve your living standards?

I'm not young anymore, but I got married when I was 23 and my wife was 22. I was just out of college. At the time, she was teaching half time and I had to start working at a video store to help pay the bills while I looked for a programming job. Before we got married, we bought a cheap house and renovated it, which kept the mortgage payments down. As better jobs came along, I took them, and I started writing software a year after we got married.


(28-04-2014 12:25 PM)elconquistador Wrote:  Those who are married and older, have some wise advise?

Communication is important. I can't count the number of times there was a problem because one of us assumed something.

If your wife is losing her temper and saying things she shouldn't, don't respond in kind. Hopefully, down the road when you're doing the same thing, she'll help diffuse the situation. If you're angry to the point where you can't think straight "I'm to upset to talk about it now. Lets discuss this later." is a perfectly valid answer.

Remember to pay attention to little details. It's one thing to get your wife a gift that she asks for. It's another to figure out something before she asks for this. Disclaimer: I'm fucking terrible at this. In ten years, I can think of one gift that I spontaneously got my wife and that she liked.
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29-04-2014, 06:29 AM
RE: 21 and Married
First time I got married at 20, times were different then and we were both impulsive and I was all out crazy, with what now seems like a death wish. It only lasted 5 years and was for the last part, a nightmare.

Second marriage is still going after 27 years but there are other problems now beyond our control. Tho for 24 years it was great.

My advice would be to take it very slow, no kids, no house. As you get older, both of you will change, and in that time it will show if the marriage is solid enough to perserver.

If bullshit were music some people would be a brass band.
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29-04-2014, 06:37 AM
RE: 21 and Married
My deepest condolences Sadcryface2

"If you want a happy ending, that depends, of course, on where you stop your story." Orson Welles
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29-04-2014, 12:18 PM
RE: 21 and Married
You could do worse than listen to Chris Rock on the subject.

http://www.thewackywongs.com/chris-rocks...verything/


WARNING!!! - NSFW -

At least turn the speakers way down or use a head set.

Atheism is NOT a Religion. It's A Personal Relationship With Reality!
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29-04-2014, 01:09 PM
RE: 21 and Married
(29-04-2014 12:18 PM)Minimalist Wrote:  You could do worse than listen to Chris Rock on the subject.

http://www.thewackywongs.com/chris-rocks...verything/


WARNING!!! - NSFW -

At least turn the speakers way down or use a head set.

I would have to agree with Chris Rock, its funny the way he tells it, but its the sad truth. Dodgy

Flame suit on.... Unsure

If bullshit were music some people would be a brass band.
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