A Very Turkey Burner Christmas
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22-12-2016, 08:56 PM
A Very Turkey Burner Christmas
Well, boys and girls it's that magical time of year again. It's time for a Very Turkey Burner Christmas. Last Year I wrote "A Visit from St. Snipples" (Available in the Nudist Atheist thread Yes and also available on audio cassette No )

I am entitling this year's literary gem: "Oh Snipple Tree"

Oh Snipple tree, Oh Snipple tree!
Thy snipples are so perky
Oh Snipple tree, Oh Snipple tree,
Thy snipples are so pec-tacular

Not only pink when summer's here,
But also when it's cold and drear.
Oh Snipple tree, Oh Snipple tree,
Thy snipples are so tiny!

Oh Snipple tree, Oh Snipple tree,
Such pleasure do you bring me!
Oh Snipple tree, Oh Snipple tree,
Such pleasure do you bring me!

For every year this Snipple tree,
Brings to us such joy and glee.
Oh Snipple tree, Oh Snipple tree,
Such pleasure do you bring me!

Oh Snipple tree, Oh Snipple tree,
You're snipples will ever be ah-mazing!
A symbol of your Turkey-ness
They'll ever be breath-taking

Each shining light
Each silver bell
Attached to your Snipples
brings holiday cheer
whenever you are here

"Let the waters settle and you will see the moon and stars mirrored in your own being." -Rumi
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22-12-2016, 09:30 PM
RE: A Very Turkey Burner Christmas
That was lovely JennyBee, just lovely.

except........Blush ...

I kept dropping and "S" in Snipple and envisioning a "Nipple" tree.

What's the matter with me anyway! ....Facepalm I'm just sick in the head. Yes I am. Weeping

Shakespeare's Comedy of Errors.... on Donald J. Trump:

He is deformed, crooked, old, and sere,
Ill-fac’d, worse bodied, shapeless every where;
Vicious, ungentle, foolish, blunt, unkind,
Stigmatical in making, worse in mind.
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22-12-2016, 09:33 PM
RE: A Very Turkey Burner Christmas
Here was last year's Christmas Snipple Tongue I decided to post it here to keep all this raw talent in one place Hobo

A Visit from St. Snipples

'Twas the night before Snipmas, when all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, not even a snipple;
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,
In hopes that St. Snipples soon would be there;

The children were nestled all snug in their beds;
While visions of sugarplums danced in their heads;
And mamma in her 'kerchief, and I in my cap,
Had just settled our brains for a long winter's nap,
When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from my bed to see what was the matter.

Away to the window I flew like a flash,
Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.
The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow,
Gave a lustre of midday to objects below,
When what to my wondering eyes did appear,
But a miniature sleigh and eight tiny snipples,
With a Turkey Burner driver so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment he must be St. Snip.

More rapid than eagles his coursers they came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name:
"Now, Nippy! now, Mammary! now Teensy and Tiny!
On, Pygmy! on,Mini ! on, Microscopic and Minute!
To the top of the porch! to the top of the wall!
Now dash away! dash away! dash away all!"

As leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,
When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky;
So up to the housetop the coursers they flew
With the sleigh full of toys, and St. Snipples too—
And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof
The prancing and pawing of each little hoof.

As I drew in my head, and was turning around,
Down the chimney St. Snipples came with a bound.
He was naked, from his head to his foot,
No clothes, but his snipples were all tarnished with ashes and soot;
A bundle of toys he had flung on his back,
And he looked like a pedler just opening his pack.

His snipples—how they twinkled! how pert, how merry!
His ass cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry!
His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,
And the beard on his chin was as white as the snow;
The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth,
And the smoke, it encircled his head like a wreath;
He had a broad face and a little round belly,
That shook when he laughed, like a bowl full of jelly.

He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,
And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself;
A wink of his eye and a twist of his snipples
Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread;

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
And filled all the stockings; then turned with a jerk,
And laying his finger aside of his snipple,
And giving a nod, up the chimney he rose;

He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,
And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.
But I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight—
“Happy Snipples to all, and to all a good night!”

"Let the waters settle and you will see the moon and stars mirrored in your own being." -Rumi
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22-12-2016, 09:34 PM
RE: A Very Turkey Burner Christmas
(22-12-2016 09:30 PM)dancefortwo Wrote:  That was lovely JennyBee, just lovely.

except........Blush ...

I kept dropping and "S" in Snipple and envisioning a "Nipple" tree.

What's the matter with me anyway! ....Facepalm I'm just sick in the head. Yes I am. Weeping

That means the snipple spirit has entered your heart Big Grin

"Let the waters settle and you will see the moon and stars mirrored in your own being." -Rumi
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22-12-2016, 09:37 PM
RE: A Very Turkey Burner Christmas
Bowing

Big Grin

Shakespeare's Comedy of Errors.... on Donald J. Trump:

He is deformed, crooked, old, and sere,
Ill-fac’d, worse bodied, shapeless every where;
Vicious, ungentle, foolish, blunt, unkind,
Stigmatical in making, worse in mind.
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22-12-2016, 09:48 PM
RE: A Very Turkey Burner Christmas
What's going on here?

Check out my now-defunct atheism blog. It's just a blog, no ads, no revenue, no gods.
----
Atheism promotes critical thinking; theism promotes hypocritical thinking. -- Me
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22-12-2016, 09:53 PM
RE: A Very Turkey Burner Christmas
(22-12-2016 09:48 PM)WillHopp Wrote:  What's going on here?

It's an ode to Turkey Burner's snipples (aka noticeably small nipples) Wink

"Let the waters settle and you will see the moon and stars mirrored in your own being." -Rumi
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22-12-2016, 09:57 PM
RE: A Very Turkey Burner Christmas
... OMZ!

Check out my now-defunct atheism blog. It's just a blog, no ads, no revenue, no gods.
----
Atheism promotes critical thinking; theism promotes hypocritical thinking. -- Me
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22-12-2016, 10:01 PM
RE: A Very Turkey Burner Christmas
(22-12-2016 09:57 PM)WillHopp Wrote:  ... OMZ!


I think Jenny's been nipping at the cooking cherry. Tongue

Shakespeare's Comedy of Errors.... on Donald J. Trump:

He is deformed, crooked, old, and sere,
Ill-fac’d, worse bodied, shapeless every where;
Vicious, ungentle, foolish, blunt, unkind,
Stigmatical in making, worse in mind.
Find all posts by this user
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22-12-2016, 10:06 PM
RE: A Very Turkey Burner Christmas
(22-12-2016 10:01 PM)dancefortwo Wrote:  
(22-12-2016 09:57 PM)WillHopp Wrote:  ... OMZ!


I think Jenny's been nipping at the cooking cherry. Tongue

Maybe Blush Only I wasn't cooking and it's tequila Tongue

"Let the waters settle and you will see the moon and stars mirrored in your own being." -Rumi
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