A brief history of Escape Artist...
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20-12-2012, 05:04 PM
RE: A brief history of Escape Artist...
This is just a gripe/vent today - my husband has spoken maybe ten words to me over the past few days and I'm wondering if he's figured out that I'm at the end of my rope and that he's out of chances. I've been told that it's best for me to file for a divorce first - that that will put me at a legal advantage - but I wanted to wait until after the stress of holidays and the year-end rush at work was over before I did so. Now I'm wondering if he is going to try and consult a lawyer before I do. I don't know that he will because I think he'll try and hold onto me as long as he can - er, hold onto his ATM as long as he can - but it worries me.

Okay, gripe session over.

Oh, and I promise I have some better stuff to talk about in regards to, you know, atheism - including how you don't notice how pervasive religion is until you're outside of it - but this looming divorce is front and center in my brain right now.

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20-12-2012, 05:38 PM
RE: A brief history of Escape Artist...
(20-12-2012 05:04 PM)Escape Artist Wrote:  This is just a gripe/vent today - my husband has spoken maybe ten words to me over the past few days and I'm wondering if he's figured out that I'm at the end of my rope and that he's out of chances. I've been told that it's best for me to file for a divorce first - that that will put me at a legal advantage - but I wanted to wait until after the stress of holidays and the year-end rush at work was over before I did so. Now I'm wondering if he is going to try and consult a lawyer before I do. I don't know that he will because I think he'll try and hold onto me as long as he can - er, hold onto his ATM as long as he can - but it worries me.

Okay, gripe session over.

Oh, and I promise I have some better stuff to talk about in regards to, you know, atheism - including how you don't notice how pervasive religion is until you're outside of it - but this looming divorce is front and center in my brain right now.




Your New Year's resolution should be to lose 200 ugly lbs...






















Or however much your husband weighs. Evil_monster

"All that is necessary for the triumph of Calvinism is that good Atheists do nothing." ~Eric Oh My
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21-12-2012, 08:05 AM
RE: A brief history of Escape Artist...
(20-12-2012 05:38 PM)Erxomai Wrote:  
(20-12-2012 05:04 PM)Escape Artist Wrote:  This is just a gripe/vent today - my husband has spoken maybe ten words to me over the past few days and I'm wondering if he's figured out that I'm at the end of my rope and that he's out of chances. I've been told that it's best for me to file for a divorce first - that that will put me at a legal advantage - but I wanted to wait until after the stress of holidays and the year-end rush at work was over before I did so. Now I'm wondering if he is going to try and consult a lawyer before I do. I don't know that he will because I think he'll try and hold onto me as long as he can - er, hold onto his ATM as long as he can - but it worries me.

Okay, gripe session over.

Oh, and I promise I have some better stuff to talk about in regards to, you know, atheism - including how you don't notice how pervasive religion is until you're outside of it - but this looming divorce is front and center in my brain right now.




Your New Year's resolution should be to lose 200 ugly lbs...






















Or however much your husband weighs. Evil_monster
Oh, it's well over 200. Last I knew, he was at least 350 and that might be low-balling it. And this is the same man who told me that if I gained weight, he'd not be sexually attracted to me anymore. Dodgy

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21-12-2012, 09:27 AM
RE: A brief history of Escape Artist...
Maybe you could move to a 3rd or 4th floor apartment without an elevator.

I doubt he'll want to follow you.

And if he does, he may lose weight and become a happier person. Thumbsup

"All that is necessary for the triumph of Calvinism is that good Atheists do nothing." ~Eric Oh My
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21-12-2012, 12:04 PM
RE: A brief history of Escape Artist...
(21-12-2012 09:27 AM)Erxomai Wrote:  Maybe you could move to a 3rd or 4th floor apartment without an elevator.

I doubt he'll want to follow you.

And if he does, he may lose weight and become a happier person. Thumbsup
lol - You know, I think he will lose weight after we split and that he may even change his ways in regards to money and respect, but it'll be for a different woman. Not for me. I've resigned myself to that.

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21-12-2012, 12:14 PM
A brief history of Escape Artist...
(21-12-2012 12:04 PM)Escape Artist Wrote:  
(21-12-2012 09:27 AM)Erxomai Wrote:  Maybe you could move to a 3rd or 4th floor apartment without an elevator.

I doubt he'll want to follow you.

And if he does, he may lose weight and become a happier person. Thumbsup
lol - You know, I think he will lose weight after we split and that he may even change his ways in regards to money and respect, but it'll be for a different woman. Not for me. I've resigned myself to that.

I don't know, I think I've seen more women who grow their hair out and lose weight when they get divorced to go out and attract dudes. Girl_nails

"All that is necessary for the triumph of Calvinism is that good Atheists do nothing." ~Eric Oh My
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21-12-2012, 01:51 PM
RE: A brief history of Escape Artist...
(21-12-2012 12:14 PM)Erxomai Wrote:  
(21-12-2012 12:04 PM)Escape Artist Wrote:  lol - You know, I think he will lose weight after we split and that he may even change his ways in regards to money and respect, but it'll be for a different woman. Not for me. I've resigned myself to that.

I don't know, I think I've seen more women who grow their hair out and lose weight when they get divorced to go out and attract dudes. Girl_nails
Ha - if I lose weight I really will dry up and blow away like everyone's been predicting ever since I was a kid.

As for the hair, mine has grown out quite a bit, but to be fair I started growing it back out again because he didn't like it short.

P.S. - Gosh, it hurts my teeth to watch that little smiley filing her nails.

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21-12-2012, 01:53 PM
A brief history of Escape Artist...
(21-12-2012 01:51 PM)Escape Artist Wrote:  
(21-12-2012 12:14 PM)Erxomai Wrote:  I don't know, I think I've seen more women who grow their hair out and lose weight when they get divorced to go out and attract dudes. Girl_nails
Ha - if I lose weight I really will dry up and blow away like everyone's been predicting ever since I was a kid.

As for the hair, mine has grown out quite a bit, but to be fair I started growing it back out again because he didn't like it short.

P.S. - Gosh, it hurts my teeth to watch that little smiley filing her nails.

Girl_nails Girl_nails Girl_nails




Big Grin

"All that is necessary for the triumph of Calvinism is that good Atheists do nothing." ~Eric Oh My
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22-12-2012, 01:29 PM (This post was last modified: 22-12-2012 03:39 PM by GirlyMan.)
RE: A brief history of Escape Artist...
(21-12-2012 08:05 AM)Escape Artist Wrote:  Oh, it's well over 200. Last I knew, he was at least 350 and that might be low-balling it. And this is the same man who told me that if I gained weight, he'd not be sexually attracted to me anymore. Dodgy

I typically avoid commenting in threads like this 'cause having been in only one relationship my entire life I ain't in a position to give advice. But I do know a thing or two about being a big fat dude having topped out at 280 at 5'10" myself. Unless hubby's a yokozuna, he's likely got a morbid case of can'tgiveashititis and quite possibly may be clinically depressed and that's probably taking its toll on you. Took a prediabetes diagnosis to make me give a shit but even that don't work for everyone. I can sympathize with you, but I can empathize with him. I don't have any advice for you but I will say that being the first to contact a divorce lawyer will not provide you with any legal advantage. And if hubby does have a case of can'tgiveashititis and/or is clinically depressed he ain't gonna fight back anyway. Hell, if there's no dispute over division of communal property, child custody, or alimony, you may not even need a lawyer depending on the State you live in (assuming you're in the USA, that is). My brother's going through a divorce now (his wife had an affair) and the only things which will make any difference are how big a dick he wants to be and how much he wants to spend on the lawyer. (The cost of the lawyer is directly proportional to the degree of their prickness.)

Well that was far more than someone unqualified to comment should've said.

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26-12-2012, 04:39 PM
RE: A brief history of Escape Artist...
(22-12-2012 01:29 PM)GirlyMan Wrote:  
(21-12-2012 08:05 AM)Escape Artist Wrote:  Oh, it's well over 200. Last I knew, he was at least 350 and that might be low-balling it. And this is the same man who told me that if I gained weight, he'd not be sexually attracted to me anymore. Dodgy

I typically avoid commenting in threads like this 'cause having been in only one relationship my entire life I ain't in a position to give advice. But I do know a thing or two about being a big fat dude having topped out at 280 at 5'10" myself. Unless hubby's a yokozuna, he's likely got a morbid case of can'tgiveashititis and quite possibly may be clinically depressed and that's probably taking its toll on you. Took a prediabetes diagnosis to make me give a shit but even that don't work for everyone. I can sympathize with you, but I can empathize with him. I don't have any advice for you but I will say that being the first to contact a divorce lawyer will not provide you with any legal advantage. And if hubby does have a case of can'tgiveashititis and/or is clinically depressed he ain't gonna fight back anyway. Hell, if there's no dispute over division of communal property, child custody, or alimony, you may not even need a lawyer depending on the State you live in (assuming you're in the USA, that is). My brother's going through a divorce now (his wife had an affair) and the only things which will make any difference are how big a dick he wants to be and how much he wants to spend on the lawyer. (The cost of the lawyer is directly proportional to the degree of their prickness.)

Well that was far more than someone unqualified to comment should've said.
I am in the USA and technically no, we would not need a lawyer. At least, that is my understanding of state of Texas law. If we could come to an agreement on our own, we could file the paperwork ourselves with the county we live in, but I just don't know how he'll react to news of a divorce. I want to be prepared.

Anyway, that is good news that whoever files first is not at any particular advantage over the other. It didn't make too much sense to me when the advice was given - why would it matter who filed first? - but I digress.

I get what you're saying about the laziness and he has admitting to being so, but I just don't think it'll change. He just doesn't care. Now, it's hard for me to believe that it's actual depression rather than plain-and-simple-laziness, but that is only because I struggle with depression from time to time, too - situational depression, I guess? I've not been "officially" diagnosed or anything like that - and he doesn't seem to act the way I do when I am down in the dumps. He is just lazy all the time. From my own experience with depression, it isn't all the time. At any rate, whether he is really is clinically depressed or lazy, I just don't see any hope for us. That saddens me, yes, but I can't help but feel I'll be miserable if I don't get out of this marriage.

I'm rambling. Gotta go.

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