A rant.
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30-07-2010, 01:09 AM
 
A rant.
The other day, I was having a good time with my step dad and my pops, and all of the sudden my mom calls and FREAKS OUT on me for having my religious views on Facebook set to "Atheist." She told me she doesn't want her family to see that because it would embarrass her, which just pissed me the fuck off. She said if I didn't unlike all my Atheist pages that I liked, she would ground me for a year.

WHAT THE HELL?

As you can tell, I officially hate my mom.
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30-07-2010, 06:50 AM
 
RE: A rant.
Approaching this in a hateful way never works (even if that is how you really feel).

If your mother is a complete religious fundamentalist, then a discussion about your views probably won't work. But you still must try. Always remain the calmer, logical side. She will probably just scream at you, but you must try and make her listen. Explain your views. Tell her you respect her religious views (even if this isn't true), and that she must respect yours. Bring up the fact that you have freedom of religion, according to your country's constitution (I assume you live in a country that does).

Tell her that convincing you otherwise is as futile as you convincing her to be an atheist. You can go to Church (or whatever place of worship you attend) do all the stuff, but you'll never mean it.

After you've had this talk, if your mom lets off, good. Once I went through it, life was a lot easier.

If she doesn't, I'm sorry to say you have little choice, if you want to avoid tension. You could give in, but if you want to stand up for your views, then never back down. It's your choice.

BTW if you leave the religious views field blank on facebook, then nothing is shown at all. It's a good way for you not have to show it as a religion, but not get in trouble for it for being atheist.

Of course, you shouldn't be in trouble for it, so that is why you need to have this discussion.
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30-07-2010, 08:03 AM
 
RE: A rant.
it's funny how people are so scared of a word. they usually don't know or understand what it even means. i agree with truthaddict. leave religion blank and just delete the posts on your wall that say you like a certain group. you don't have to unlike them, just remove the posts that say you do like them. if she still finds something to argue about, then try having the talk with her. remind her that judging you and your ideas will put a wedge in the relationship you have with each other. good luck. and never ever hate your mother. she's only trying to do what she thinks is best for her child. really, she is.
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30-07-2010, 02:53 PM
 
RE: A rant.
Luckily I am older and when my stepmother (at the time) saw it, she unfriended me. I did not really care either. In your situation, you could follow Truth Addict's advice as it is good. I could not though even if I was in your shoes. I might follow this cool little motto "God Made Me An Atheist! Who are you to question His wisdom", but your mother may not like that!
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30-07-2010, 03:09 PM
RE: A rant.
(30-07-2010 02:53 PM)evilgenius Wrote:  Luckily I am older and when my stepmother (at the time) saw it, she unfriended me. I did not really care either. In your situation, you could follow Truth Addict's advice as it is good. I could not though even if I was in your shoes. I might follow this cool little motto "God Made Me An Atheist! Who are you to question His wisdom", but your mother may not like that!

I need a t-shirt that says that right now!!

So many cats, so few good recipes.
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30-07-2010, 04:04 PM
RE: A rant.
Grounded for a year? ask her about her ''christian tolerance''.
I'd say that was just a typical ''Butters! You are grounded, mr'' parental reaction, which usually takes place when a child does something stupid. In this case expressing yourself online is stupid according to your mothers yardstick.
She'll get used to you being a nonbeliever in time[/quote]

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30-07-2010, 05:38 PM
 
RE: A rant.
This is why you never friend family members on Facebook....
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30-07-2010, 06:57 PM
 
RE: A rant.
Luckily my real mother does not use a computer at all!
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31-07-2010, 01:42 PM
 
RE: A rant.
your situation makes me wonder how i'd react if my son decided he wanted to be a christian. i can't imaging telling him he's grounded if he felt like he wanted to explore god and its meanings. i'd like to think that i've raised him to question the unknowable as supposed to giving god credit for it. he's only 10 now, but questions about god started when i left his father. his father and new bride decided to join a religion and basically polluted my sons head with hell and satan about 6 years ago. not knowing any religious answers i told my son we could participate in a church if he wanted to. he still has no desire to do so, but he might when he gets older. i would never tell him he couldn't even though i view religion in the same way as religious people view atheists. growing up and choosing a path is all about experience. for instance, you can't very well choose a favorite color if the only color you know is red.
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31-07-2010, 02:20 PM
 
RE: A rant.
The subject is very difficult and I'm sure there are many who face the same type of dilemma on a daily basis. Speaking your voice while keeping in a good relationship with your close and loved ones while overcoming these kind of differences.

I don't know how old you are but since you live with your parents I will treat this very gently. Personally what I would suggest in situation like this is that you should sit with your mother for a heart-to-heart conversation and explain to her that your atheism has nothing do to with what kind of a person you are. If those who surround you love you, they love you for who you are regardless of your (lack of) personal belief and if they dislike you that too has nothing to do with it.

You and I know it, but for people who are trapped in their misconception of the term 'Atheist' it is hard to understand.

Remind her of all the things she appreciates in your personality, and stress that your atheism doesn't effect or changes that.
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