AA - Atheists and Alcoholism
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29-03-2017, 08:08 PM
RE: AA - Atheists and Alcoholism
I'm not sure why I just feel infested with rage. It's crazy. My head hurts. It's been months since I drank but it still compells me. I must be going through a spell. I'm so sick of everything and everyone.
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30-03-2017, 03:20 AM
RE: AA - Atheists and Alcoholism
(29-03-2017 07:47 PM)ImFred Wrote:  I felt pretty mellow today until I got accused of stealing something at work at the end of the day. I don't want to say the exact details but it wasn't a direct accusation but like I would ever want their broken ass outdated shit. I don't even fucking care if they think I'm a thief and I would steal from those fucks if they had anything worth stealing. I just feel like they brought it up just to fuck with me. I felt like smashing someone's fucking face in. Then AA was an all God meeting. For fuck's sake. I swear I can't stand being sober all the time. I feel like not only going out and getting drunk but I feel like ripping up on an ugly anti-social bender. I'm not though. Just fuck.

I used to do shit like that brother. I remember having an internal argument with myself each morning when I got of duty from the Fire Station. I would beg myself to please not go by the liquor store today. Just go one day sober and then maybe I can stretch it into two and so on. Never worked. On the rare occasions that I worked up the ability to stay sober for a day I would wake up the next day and think "shit... I didn't drink yesterday so I can double up today!". That's how bad it had gotten.

I've been clean for a long enough period of time that I honestly don't think about it anymore. If I do think about it I realize that I'll just feel more depressed, ashamed of myself for going back there, and knowing that it is only a bandaid that will not hold in the real problems. It will only make it worse. Almost every bad mistake I've made in my life has been because of drugs or alcohol and I have paid the price for those mistakes. I've no desire to repeat them. Here's to hoping you can find the peace that you so truly deserve.

I get to decide what my life looks like, not the other way around.
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30-03-2017, 03:47 AM
RE: AA - Atheists and Alcoholism
I feel better after some shut eye

The biggest threat to my sobriety is getting so upset my give a fuck totally breaks

I was getting close last night. I'm not so sure why.
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30-03-2017, 03:57 AM
RE: AA - Atheists and Alcoholism
(30-03-2017 03:47 AM)ImFred Wrote:  I feel better after some shut eye

The biggest threat to my sobriety is getting so upset my give a fuck totally breaks

I was getting close last night. I'm not so sure why.

Believe me I understand. I used to feel that way not long after I quit. But as time passed it became easier to not sweat the things that I could not change. Now I have my hobbies to keep me occupied and my mind clear. So I just replaced one for the other. Brother if you ever feel the need to get shit off your chest just PM me. I'll always answer. I've been there. Though our circumstances may be different how we got there the end result is the same.

I get to decide what my life looks like, not the other way around.
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30-03-2017, 03:33 PM
RE: AA - Atheists and Alcoholism
(30-03-2017 03:47 AM)ImFred Wrote:  I feel better after some shut eye

The biggest threat to my sobriety is getting so upset my give a fuck totally breaks

I was getting close last night. I'm not so sure why.

I feel ya, bro. It gets better. Really.

It gets so much easier that the idea of a drink rarely occurs and emotions become easier to handle - the bad is less so, the good is better.

Skepticism is not a position; it is an approach to claims.
Science is not a subject, but a method.
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30-03-2017, 03:59 PM
RE: AA - Atheists and Alcoholism
Thanks guys

I'm feeling better

Just gonna kick it with a book tonight
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13-04-2017, 08:50 PM
RE: AA - Atheists and Alcoholism
The latest podcast on 12 step programs is really good.
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28-04-2017, 12:07 AM
RE: AA - Atheists and Alcoholism
Hello all,

I am an atheist alcoholic in Canberra (capital of Australia).

I co-founded an AA meeting for agnostics and atheists.

We meet at the Civic Library on Fridays nights at 6:30pm.

I really enjoyed Seth's take on AA.
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28-04-2017, 05:24 AM
RE: AA - Atheists and Alcoholism
That's cool man

I wish we had a group like that around here but I don't have the get up and go to start one.
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02-08-2017, 03:28 PM
RE: AA - Atheists and Alcoholism
I'm still not drinking but I've quit going to meetings.

Story:

I know a guy whose wife had cancer. When she was sick their church told them if their faith was strong enough she would be healed. He became fanatically involved in the church.

Spoiler Alert: She died.

Then he felt shunned by his congregation. Now he's bitter and hateful.

AA, at least down here where I am, is sort of like that. You don't drink and it's supposed to be all about your higher power. It's not because I fought off the cravings and started taking control of my life. But if you do drink it's all your fault for not being in touch with your higher power.

I was in a meeting it was going so God crazy that I walked out. I decided fuck it. I can't stand their shit anymore. How it works. Serenity prayer. Lord's Prayer. Bored with it and sick of it. I can not drink simply by not drinking.

So that's it for me and AA.
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