Am I Over-Thinking?
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17-04-2013, 09:38 PM
RE: Am I Over-Thinking?
Welcome...

I just think that someone who believes they should love a god more than a human being is a cunt... not much else to say on the matter.

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18-04-2013, 07:25 AM
RE: Am I Over-Thinking?
Hey Kris

I came from the same religious background (pentecostal) as you and your Mom. It is hard to break out of the mindset that they have. Emotion and feelings are always close to the surface so you can "worship in the spirit" which also makes life difficult when serious topics come up. At least it did in my family. Everything was always drama filled.

I'm a little older than you (29) and have been living on my own for a few years now. But I still love my parents and don't like the idea of lying to them. My life is not something I should have to live in silence or hiding. I don't feel the need to parade my lack of faith, but I didn't want to feel like I was hiding it. That felt wrong.

Last night I came out to them as an atheist. It was hard to do. They both think I am lost and hopeless. They think I am going to hell. It's not a fun thing to talk about. I've known for a decade that I was second in their eyes to their faith. It's not easy.

Don't give up. You should check and see if their are any atheist groups in your area that you might be able to connect with. Once I found one here it really helped a lot to talk to people who were on the same page as me. Who had been through what I was going through. Try MEETUP.com. There are often groups using that service to provide access to the community. If not there, the Unitarian Unilateralist "churches" are very accepting of all types and frequently have atheists in attendance.

“A philosopher once asked, “Are we human because we gaze at the stars, or do we gaze at them because we are human?” Pointless, really… “Do the stars gaze back?” Now *that’s* a question.”
-from Stardust (2007)
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18-04-2013, 07:50 AM
RE: Am I Over-Thinking?
I was taught that stuff when I was a kid. Love your God more than friends. Always seemed pretty impossible to me. Family mostly seem to ignore it Tongue
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18-04-2013, 08:13 AM
RE: Am I Over-Thinking?
(18-04-2013 07:50 AM)morondog Wrote:  I was taught that stuff when I was a kid. Love your God more than friends. Always seemed pretty impossible to me. Family mostly seem to ignore it Tongue

Hm. Consider

I woulda thought it would be easy for your friends and family to love God more than you. Laughat

"All that is necessary for the triumph of Calvinism is that good Atheists do nothing." ~Eric Oh My
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18-04-2013, 08:18 AM
RE: Am I Over-Thinking?
(18-04-2013 08:13 AM)Erxomai Wrote:  I woulda thought it would be easy for your friends and family to love God more than you. Laughat
Says the man who...

OK fuck you anyway. Asshole. Tongue
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18-04-2013, 10:27 PM
RE: Am I Over-Thinking?
Welcome and congratulations!

Everyone's experience is different, but I would wait for your coming out party. Give yourself some time to flesh out your thoughts. I think it is stressful enough, being in that environment, fairly new to de-conversion, etc...focus on your self, on learning all you can, so you know how to express what you want to say, the way you want to say it. After all, this is about you, and your life, not them and theirs. Just a thought, and good luck!
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20-04-2013, 08:45 PM
RE: Am I Over-Thinking?
Cryssi45 Wrote:Thanks. I appreciate the kind words. I battle in my mind whether is even worth telling my mom. but I feel so fake and deceitful when i just blow it all off.

I told my mom when I was about 16 and 17. She was devastated, but it wasn't nearly as bad as some of the stories I've heard. She's pretty much a plain jane Methodist--no snake handling or speaking in tongues. We don't really talk about it now. I think she believes I outgrew it. She used to take me to church when I moved back home after graduating from college. I went because she asked me to go with her and my dad didn't always go because he was so depressed. I should've objected when she signed me up to participate in her church's Easter cantata, but I love my mom. I felt like such a liar.

Cryssi45 Wrote:You guys are so supportive. I was so afraid that I would get the "stop whining" speech. I guess I'm used to the average Reddit response haha.

Yeah, this is definitely not like reddit. I'm new here too. I didn't expect it to be too bad. I figured this community would reflect Seth's attitude. Do you listen to the podcasts? They're fantastic.
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21-04-2013, 01:32 AM
RE: Am I Over-Thinking?
(20-04-2013 08:45 PM)cbb2274 Wrote:  I figured this community would reflect Seth's attitude.

Blasphemy! He said the name of our Lord!
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