Am I bad person for not liking kids?
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27-03-2015, 07:54 AM
Am I bad person for not liking kids?
I need to get this off my chest. So my brother is planning have kids and I really just don't want to be apart of it. I simply just don't like kids, I don't hate them..Its just not my kind of thing. I have uncles that were not part of my childhood, so whats the difference? I'll be happy for my brother and my sister in law, but why should I have to be apart of it? Yes, we were all kids once too..but me..I hated being one mainly because I had nothing but health issues and almost died a couple times all when I was around 3 years old.

When someone hears that I don't like kids, they automatically get that disgusted look on their face. I've been asked once or twice that if a child was in trouble, would I try to rescue them? I hate being asked that..of course I would try my best to rescue if one was in trouble...I'm not that bad of a human being..it makes me really sad that someone would ask someone that question, makes me feel worthless like I don't even deserve to live.

I try to avoid my uncles 10 year old, that kid scares the shit out of me. I swear he is going to either be a serial killer or an arsonist. Last fall at my grandparents, he took a whole of roll toilet paper and lit it on fire in the bathroom sink. No idea how he got matches, but he found them. What did my uncle do? Nothing.

Because of my brother is having kids soon and he turned 30 today and I'm 24, I've been asked when I plan on having kids and I always say, I don't plan to and here comes that disgusted face again. "oh you're just being selfish" Nope, I just don't have any interest. Earth is already over populated enough anyways and I don't want to contribute to it..how is that being selfish when I'm thinking about our future? A lot of my friends from high school had kids and some of them, it destroyed their lives.

I just don't understand why some say you need to have kids to be happy. Its my life, why can't I do what I want? I want to do what makes me happy and having kids its not one of them, why does that make me a bad person? I love cats...

I guess I feel a little better letting some of this out..but still feel like crap when this subject comes up.

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day; teach a man to fish and he will eat for a lifetime; give a man religion and he will die praying for a fish.
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27-03-2015, 08:03 AM
RE: Am I bad person for not liking kids?
To answer the question that is the title of this post, no. You can't change who you are. As an atheist, I can't change what I believe. Now, more information could change my mind, and then I could feel differently, but it's how I feel right now, that there are no gods. Same with you and your opinion of children. At the moment, your interactions with most kids have been less than appealing and you've built an opinion. Why must we like children but it's ok to dislike adults? Do I think you're a horrible person for not being fruitful and multiplying? Hell no.

Do I think you may change your mind someday? It's possible you could soften your stance, but either way, no, you're not a bad person for these feelings.

Check out my now-defunct atheism blog. It's just a blog, no ads, no revenue, no gods.
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Atheism promotes critical thinking; theism promotes hypocritical thinking. -- Me
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27-03-2015, 08:10 AM
RE: Am I bad person for not liking kids?
No, you aren't "bad" and if someone thinks that, they are trying to manipulate you into living up to their image of you. You know who you are and that is enough... others do not live your life.

Fuck 'em.

Drinking Beverage

A new type of thinking is essential if mankind is to survive and move to higher levels. ~ Albert Einstein
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27-03-2015, 08:12 AM
RE: Am I bad person for not liking kids?
No you're not a bad person. You're only 24 and IMO you have way more shit to do than worry about liking kids or not. I would guess that in about 10 years or so you may soften your stance on kids. Also, your own kids are way better than someone else's kids but they still drain all your energy. And if for some reason you don't change your stance, who gives a shit.

Who are we? We find that we live on an insignificant planet of a humdrum star lost in a galaxy tucked away in some forgotten corner of a universe in which there are far more galaxies than people.

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27-03-2015, 08:24 AM
RE: Am I bad person for not liking kids?
(27-03-2015 07:54 AM)nerwin Wrote:  Because of my brother is having kids soon and he turned 30 today and I'm 24, I've been asked when I plan on having kids and I always say, I don't plan to and here comes that disgusted face again. "oh you're just being selfish" Nope, I just don't have any interest. Earth is already over populated enough anyways and I don't want to contribute to it..how is that being selfish when I'm thinking about our future? A lot of my friends from high school had kids and some of them, it destroyed their lives.

You might suggest that having kids is the selfish choice. Drinking Beverage

Skepticism is not a position; it is an approach to claims.
Science is not a subject, but a method.
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27-03-2015, 08:25 AM
RE: Am I bad person for not liking kids?
There's nothing wrong with not liking kids. Frankly, I've never understood why people want to pressure someone who doesn't want kinds into having them!
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27-03-2015, 08:25 AM
RE: Am I bad person for not liking kids?
I completely agree, someday my stance could soften and it could after my brother has his..but known myself..probably not. lol. I have a close cousin of mine, her and her soon-to-be husband also made a decision to not have kids. But now that I thinking about it...It kind of does seem to be more and more people not having kids.

I remember some of my classmates in school having kids! Now that's just insane. With that being said, my parents had me and my brother at a young age because they wanted to do stuff with us. My brother is 30 and my mom just turned 50 and dad is only a couple years older. I guess I should be thankful for having parents young as they are..me and my dad built a muscle car together and that's was awesome and so I can understand that part of having a family...but its just something that I don't want to do, I thinking having kids would limit me on what I want to do.

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day; teach a man to fish and he will eat for a lifetime; give a man religion and he will die praying for a fish.
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27-03-2015, 08:33 AM
RE: Am I bad person for not liking kids?
Well, if you make a shit ton of money and have a lot of assets, people seem to be overly occupied with who gets it all when you croak. Trust me on this. Dodgy

A new type of thinking is essential if mankind is to survive and move to higher levels. ~ Albert Einstein
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27-03-2015, 08:52 AM
RE: Am I bad person for not liking kids?
I think its great that you have thought it through, too many people end up parents because they werent thinking about whether or not they should be a parent.

I have MANY family members that didnt have children (by choice) and they also didnt marry, although they have all had serious relationships. One is my sister. She has never wanted children but loves being an aunt. She likes to buy gifts and show up for fun stuff and leaves when there is parenting to be done. Smile

My oldest brother, my sister, 3 uncles, 4 cousins- none have kids.


I think many people have different stages of childhood they like best. I cant stand infants. toddlers are ok when they are laughing, my children are more tolerable than other peoples kids (lol-says every parent). I am enjoying most of this age that my kids are at now (11 & 9). They can be reasoned with, don't want my car keys- although want the ipad frequently- can take care of the basics, big enough to help out, mind wide open to learning. And I would just advise that you not judge all kids by the fire starting hellion you know. Some kids (my oldest- I think prefers the company of adults to other kids) and she will frequently talk with the neighbors rather than run around the hood.


"Life is a daring adventure or it is nothing"--Helen Keller
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27-03-2015, 08:53 AM
RE: Am I bad person for not liking kids?
Quote:Because of my brother is having kids soon and he turned 30 today and I'm 24, I've been asked when I plan on having kids and I always say, I don't plan to and here comes that disgusted face again. "oh you're just being selfish" Nope, I just don't have any interest.

They're the selfish ones for insisting how you should live your life.

I've gotten this before:
"Aren't you sad at the thought that nothing happens after you die?"
No, it makes YOU sad, because you're the one who's convinced of an afterlife. You're just projecting your own feelings onto me, because you lack the perspective to realize that not everyone thinks the way you do. /endrant

Similarly:
"Don't you want kids?"
No, YOU want kids.

If we came from dust, then why is there still dust?
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