Am I not my own person?
Post Reply
 
Thread Rating:
  • 0 Votes - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
10-09-2012, 10:06 PM
RE: Am I not my own person?
Another thing that could be helpful to know is that youth do what is called trying on other 'identities'. We all do, actually, but in life youth tend to do a lot of it all at once. It's akin to little kids role-playing house or copying what their parent does in the garage or imitating cooking supper in a play kitchen. It is how a person learns all about that other thing. So, you talking or laughing like someone, or dressing different or listening to different music all of a sudden or changing interests is all about role-playing. People do this to try to figure out what bests suits who 'they' are. Smile

Freaks the shit out of a lot of adults for some reason. Maybe because some of that role playing turns into risky behaviour, like experimenting with harsh drugs, sex and joining the mafia or something. But really, if one stays safe, they can stay mafia free Thumbsup . Imitating a laugh or language is merely communication techniques of admiration and nothing more.

I agree with previous posters, why do others mention you are changing for the worse? Maybe you are more anti social or something? Maybe your relationship has changed with them? If so, how? (specific examples). That might give some insight.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 2 users Like LadyJane's post
11-09-2012, 06:51 AM
RE: Am I not my own person?
(10-09-2012 09:23 PM)Erxomai Wrote:  I bet if you tell your mom she has nescient perspectives she'll leave you the fuck alone. Drinking Beverage

She probably wouldn't know was "nescient" means. Smartass
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes Ferdinand's post
11-09-2012, 06:57 AM
RE: Am I not my own person?
(10-09-2012 07:23 PM)Ferdinand Wrote:  
(10-09-2012 06:42 PM)Dom Wrote:  Geez, how old are you? Sounds to me like you are just growing and changing and your mom wants her boy back.

Happens to everyone, just that mom's reactions vary. But they all want their little boy back.

I'm 16. And Dom, I'm a girl. Blush

Sorry, that's twice in one day I assigned the wrong gender to people!

What I said still holds, you are not the same little girl your mom had fun with, you are drastically changing now and she feels you slipping away and wants to stop that.

She can't, though, it's just natural that you are changing and there is nothing she can do to stop it. You are fixing to be an adult and your personality is going from child to adult.

If you are "trying on different character traits" to see if they fit, that's normal too. Eventually you will probably adopt some of them because they are a good fit, and develop more of your own, and then you have a new personality. Meanwhile, it's awkward sometimes.

Your mom is grasping at straws here, and she is going to have to change also to adjust to your not being her little girl. It takes time for her, same as it does for you.

Don't be too hard on her, but also don't let her derail your development. Change can be hard, but life is all about changes. Just flow with it and it will fall into place.

[Image: dobie.png]

Science is the process we've designed to be responsible for generating our best guess as to what the fuck is going on. Girly Man
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
11-09-2012, 07:20 AM
RE: Am I not my own person?
(10-09-2012 10:06 PM)LadyJane Wrote:  I agree with previous posters, why do others mention you are changing for the worse? Maybe you are more anti social or something? Maybe your relationship has changed with them? If so, how? (specific examples). That might give some insight.

I've always been sortov social. Not the total gossip birdy, but moderately, I talk to everyone. I feel like it's because I've made new friends, and my older friends aren't happy with it. I've realized that I just don't like the people here as much as I used to. It's not that I've met better people elsewhere, because I still love the few people here. But I feel like some of those people have my wings tied. Like I'm on a leash and they refuse to let me explore. I've drifted greatly from one of my three best friends, but I don't think it's just me. Not to turn the subject, but I'm tired of being blamed for changing. I'm not changing. I'm growing. and conversations seem to work both ways, right? So why can't a friend talk to me first, for a change? Why can't a friend admit that they are also growing up? We won't be the same people, but we can work with it.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes Ferdinand's post
11-09-2012, 07:27 AM
RE: Am I not my own person?
(11-09-2012 06:51 AM)Ferdinand Wrote:  She probably wouldn't know was "nescient" means. Smartass

I had to google it Dodgy.

Best and worst of Ferdinand .....
Best
Ferdinand: We don't really say 'theist' in Alabama. Here, you're either a Christian, or you're from Afghanistan and we fucking hate you.
Worst
Ferdinand: Everyone from British is so, like, fucking retarded.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes Hughsie's post
11-09-2012, 07:30 AM
RE: Am I not my own person?
(11-09-2012 07:27 AM)Hughsie Wrote:  
(11-09-2012 06:51 AM)Ferdinand Wrote:  She probably wouldn't know was "nescient" means. Smartass

I had to google it Dodgy.

Bless you. Hug
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 2 users Like Ferdinand's post
11-09-2012, 07:35 AM
RE: Am I not my own person?
(11-09-2012 06:57 AM)Dom Wrote:  Sorry, that's twice in one day I assigned the wrong gender to people!

-_-

[Image: Untitled-2.png?_subject_uid=322943157&am...Y7Dzq4lJog]
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes Logica Humano's post
11-09-2012, 07:37 AM
RE: Am I not my own person?
(11-09-2012 07:35 AM)Logica Humano Wrote:  
(11-09-2012 06:57 AM)Dom Wrote:  Sorry, that's twice in one day I assigned the wrong gender to people!

-_-

Rofl! People keep thinking I am male, so I consider it even anyways.

[Image: dobie.png]

Science is the process we've designed to be responsible for generating our best guess as to what the fuck is going on. Girly Man
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes Dom's post
11-09-2012, 07:42 AM
RE: Am I not my own person?
(11-09-2012 07:30 AM)Ferdinand Wrote:  
(11-09-2012 07:27 AM)Hughsie Wrote:  I had to google it Dodgy.

Bless you. Hug

Hughsie, that's Southern Talk for she thinks you're a simpleton.

No really. I'm being serious. Tongue

It was just a fucking apple man, we're sorry okay? Please stop the madness Laugh out load
~Izel
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
11-09-2012, 07:43 AM
RE: Am I not my own person?
(10-09-2012 07:39 AM)Ferdinand Wrote:  I was told today, by someone that means a lot to me, that I have no personality of my own. I can't even explain what that even means at this point, because I'm at such a loss. My mom yelled at me this morning and told me I was hollow. That I basically retracted the characterists of the people I surround myself with. It started off with me beginning to pick up little bits from the friends I have. You know, the person you want to be reflects the people you hang out with. I started to laugh like Sarah. I started to talk like Brooklin. I'm not myself, I'm not my own person, I have no solid personality, is practically what she summed up. I expect to wake up to a bowl of cereal, not a bowl of mom's "bullshit that makes Ferdy feel bad all day." And the worst part, she's not the first to confront me about this. My friend since the 4th grade confronted me earlier this year that I was changing, and not for the better. But I just don't see what I'm doing wrong that's so bad in their eyes. I didn't think picking up laughs and language from people was excruciatingly relationship-endangering like people are making it seem. I honestly haven't been this content with myself and the kind of person I've molded into like I am right now. I don't think I've changed. And I for one believe that change, in their eyes, is actually my true colors sprouting, in my eyes. But then again, I do want to be myself, my own person. But laughs and language don't change a person's being, right?

I'm just looking for anyone's 2 cents.

Ferdinand, tell me about yourself. What are your likes and dislikes? What do you do for fun? Favorite subjects at school and why?
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes Jeff's post
Post Reply
Forum Jump: