Anyone else do this?
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21-07-2014, 07:17 AM
Anyone else do this?
My friend/flatmate has a girlfriend/my other flatmate of whom one would call a "casual" gamer. And when I say "casual" I mean "doesn't play games". She tries because her boyfriend is really into games but she just sucks. I mean she's really bad. Mind you she's not the worst I've seen, she can actually point the gun somewhat in the general direction and get a kill or two (at the cost of dying 20 times). But she sucks.

I have another friend from high school. He is what you would call a "casual" gamer. And by "casual" gamer I mean "he doesn't play games". He also sucks. He's a workaholic and only plays to play with us.

Here's my gripe (and the purpose of the thread). My friend from high school, we give him shit for being so bad. I mean we give him absolute assholes about being a bad player. All jokingly I might add. BUT my flatmate/friends girlfriend, even though she sucks it's nothing but encouragement. No saying how that particular play was shit or how her k/d is beyond horrible. Nope, nothing but "way to go!" and "ohh you almost got him".

I feel as though this is very sexiest. Anyone else notice this? It seems to be a trend with girl gamers, they seem to be "allowed" to be bad, whereas heaven forbid a dude sucks...

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21-07-2014, 07:41 AM
RE: Anyone else do this?
I think it's sexist. Give her shit!

And maybe encourage the dude a little.

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21-07-2014, 07:54 AM
RE: Anyone else do this?
The relationship dynamics are different, though. In one case you have a mate who wants to hang out with you. You go way back. In the other case you have a romantic relationship as the connection, and the other person doesn't really want to hang out and play games but is doing it to try and understand yadda yadda yadda. Follow your housemate's lead on this one. You don't want him to think you drove her off if it all goes pear shaped.

Give me your argument in the form of a published paper, and then we can start to talk.
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21-07-2014, 09:06 AM
RE: Anyone else do this?
I think with guys its thought that the majority can and regularly do take the piss out of each other. Its competitive talk.

Girl gamer's are still quite rare, with males probably having the stereotypical expectation that they will be shit at the game, and in so maybe a pre-supposed belief of authority/power/increased skill over all girl gamer's?

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21-07-2014, 09:16 AM
RE: Anyone else do this?
If any of you were trying to fuck your buddy, I suppose you'd be more encouraging to him. Big Grin
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21-07-2014, 09:18 AM (This post was last modified: 21-07-2014 09:39 AM by Hobbitgirl.)
RE: Anyone else do this?
Treating her with kids gloves is offensive and if I were her and were doing badly and -all I got- was 'oh good job little lady" I'd be pissed off. Give her props when she pulls something good off like you would any other bloody gamer.

If shes going to be a gamer shes going to have to learn to shit talk like the rest of us.
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21-07-2014, 12:22 PM
RE: Anyone else do this?
Even when hardcore gamers start playing new games they may suck at first.

Many girls start playing without much confidence because not much is expected from them. I think it's alright to encourage a newbie in the beginning, but if she's been playing for a while now and she's not getting better, then she should face reality.

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21-07-2014, 01:54 PM
RE: Anyone else do this?
(21-07-2014 09:06 AM)bemore Wrote:  I think with guys its thought that the majority can and regularly do take the piss out of each other. Its competitive talk.

Girl gamer's are still quite rare, with males probably having the stereotypical expectation that they will be shit at the game, and in so maybe a pre-supposed belief of authority/power/increased skill over all girl gamer's?

It's not just "gamers". Females generally don't "give each other shit" while trying to learn stuff or while working - we're kind of serious that way. I think this may be a "male thing" and some females find it a confusing trait to read, until they get to know the personalities involved.

If you feel you know your flatmate's girlfriend fairly well and some gaming time has passed, I'd say ease into some good natured ribbing. If she is familiar with at least one particular game, let her know that she is now at an intermediate playing level and subject to the required ridicule for that level.

Really, it's probably the only way she will be challenged enough to stick with it and get better.

As well, she needs to start playing for her self ... not because she wants to get "in" with some stupid guy. (I find such behavior somewhat akin to stalking.) If she is sincere about wanting to learn - for herself, then she should get just as much shit for it as the next guy. Shy

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21-07-2014, 01:57 PM
RE: Anyone else do this?
(21-07-2014 01:54 PM)kim Wrote:  If you feel you know your flatmate's girlfriend fairly well and some gaming time has passed, I'd say ease into some good natured ribbing. If she is familiar with at least one particular game, let her know that she is now at an intermediate playing level and subject to the required ridicule for that level.

Really, it's probably the only way she will be challenged enough to stick with it and get better.

As well, she needs to start playing for her self ... not because she wants to get "in" with some stupid guy. (I find such behavior somewhat akin to stalking.) If she is sincere about wanting to learn - for herself, then she should get just as much shit for it as the next guy. Shy

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25-07-2014, 08:53 AM
RE: Anyone else do this?
I should probably add that she's very much a delicate flower.
She often storms off to her room to sulk when I say something "offensive" to my other flatmate.
But I have taken your advice and started to give her shit. Just taking it slow and building up to full blown "wow, you are so bad at this game you should kill yourself".

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