Are Children Overprotected or Over Idolized?
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22-03-2017, 05:16 PM (This post was last modified: 22-03-2017 05:23 PM by JesseB.)
RE: Are Children Overprotected or Over Idolized?
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(22-03-2017 09:10 AM)Ruby Crystal Wrote:  Here's a story for you.
My aunts friend had two kids. I was okay baby sitting, kids got on the xbox one and I stayed on my laptop, simple as that. They weren't dumb at least. I made them a snack when they got hungry, simple thing heated up in the microwave.

But I hated having to sit near them, not because of skin color, religion, or culture things. Just because they smelled like sour milk and who knows where else their hands have been. I hate being touched by kids, and I wasn't a kid friendly person, Hell I could barely stand my sisters. Some people are just not up for parenting.

Yet I kept getting scowled at like I was the problem, for getting annoyed when the kid played this one minuet song over.. and over... and over! For ten minuets. I was to 'be the adult' when I had only turned 18 a week ago.

So my question is, do some parents overprotect or over idolize their kids? Telling them they are 'always special' or 'always perfect'.

Because I was about to get annoyed when I was told to put the kid first over my comfort zone of kids. I can only take children under the age of 15 in short bursts before I just walk away. I don't find kids that great, I don't think your kid is all perfect.

There's my question and rant for day. Tongue

Maybe..... but when I was a kid I used to make bombs with my friends, so.... I'm prolly not qualified to speak on the matter. Frankly with all the super dangerous stupid shit I've done in my life it's amazing I'm alive today. What's more amazing is even though I technically know better, I still do crazy stupid dangerous things! lol One day I'm going to win a Darwin award for sure.

As for kids being told they are perfect? What the fuck?
1. No one is perfect
2. A kids job isn't to be a fucking kid, a kids job is to become an adult, that means learning, that means being corrected when they dun fucked up.
3. This is prolly why we have tons of fully grown toddlers running around who possess no life skills. That want to be protected from everything. Who think feelings should always be more important than logic, reason, or even survival.

I'm not conservative by any standard, I'm aware of how number 3 might make it seem like I am. I didn't grow up in a padded room, and I don't advocate anyone raising a child in a padded room. Do I want people to die? of course not, but we can't eliminate all risk, and we should be adult enough to accept that I think. And we should be raising our kids to grow up to be adults, not raising them to be children till they are 18 then expecting for no damn good reason that they should suddenly be capable of adulting. FUCK I was raised to take care of myself and I can barely adult, how the fuck is some kid that's never dealt with realty gonna be able to cope?

Edit^ I'm against violence, I think if you treat a kid with dignity and respect, and you actually fucking bother to explain shit they'll respond. I know I would have as a kid. I wanna have a kid one day, and I want to raise that kid to be an amazing adult (or do my damned best to try to), but first I'd have to find a woman who wants to have a kid with me..... I'm doomed lol

DLJ Wrote:And, yes, the principle of freedom of expression works both ways... if someone starts shit, better shit is the best counter-argument.
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22-03-2017, 05:56 PM
RE: Are Children Overprotected or Over Idolized?
(22-03-2017 05:02 PM)onlinebiker Wrote:  I observe neighbors who get up early, on their day off work to go sit at the end of the drive - waiting for their fucking kid's school bus.....

Hint - don't act surprised when you find your over-dependant ankle biter still living at home when they turn 35........

Many school districts now have rules that require parents to be waiting for the kids, or the kids aren't allowed off the bus. Just FYI.
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22-03-2017, 06:02 PM
RE: Are Children Overprotected or Over Idolized?
(22-03-2017 05:56 PM)julep Wrote:  
(22-03-2017 05:02 PM)onlinebiker Wrote:  I observe neighbors who get up early, on their day off work to go sit at the end of the drive - waiting for their fucking kid's school bus.....

Hint - don't act surprised when you find your over-dependant ankle biter still living at home when they turn 35........

Many school districts now have rules that require parents to be waiting for the kids, or the kids aren't allowed off the bus. Just FYI.

I'm going to sound reallllly old saying this..... But I used to either take public transit or walk 10 miles round trip to one of my schools, I would bike a lot further, or took public transit (usually both) when I went to school in Battlegrounds, but lived in Vancouver. This rules seems kinda bizarre to me.

Then again my parents rarely knew where I was or what I was doing, and I'd go on my own all over Portland on the bus.

(this was back in the 90's)

DLJ Wrote:And, yes, the principle of freedom of expression works both ways... if someone starts shit, better shit is the best counter-argument.
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22-03-2017, 06:20 PM
RE: Are Children Overprotected or Over Idolized?
(22-03-2017 06:02 PM)JesseB Wrote:  
(22-03-2017 05:56 PM)julep Wrote:  Many school districts now have rules that require parents to be waiting for the kids, or the kids aren't allowed off the bus. Just FYI.

I'm going to sound reallllly old saying this..... But I used to either take public transit or walk 10 miles round trip to one of my schools, I would bike a lot further, or took public transit (usually both) when I went to school in Battlegrounds, but lived in Vancouver. This rules seems kinda bizarre to me.

Then again my parents rarely knew where I was or what I was doing, and I'd go on my own all over Portland on the bus.

(this was back in the 90's)

I was never supervised at a bus stop, either. I went to a bunch of (5) elementary schools, but the only one I walked to was in fifth grade. It was an urban area with lots of junkies and other shady types. My best friend's parents had OD'd on heroin a few times, and there was an incredibly seedy motel across the street; my babysitter used to show us the track marks on her arms. Not sure how much of this my parents realized.

Not only did I walk to school, I was allowed to free-range anywhere as long as I was back in time for dinner. This was true of my whole childhood. When I was in the house, I was strictly supervised, but everybody's kids went out and played together in the general neighborhood without adults watching us.

My school district doesn't even have buses except for special needs kids and sixth graders who are too far from the middle school to walk. My kid was SN so he was entitled to a bus, but that didn't work out for long. We were required by the school to be there for pickups and drop-offs, and sometimes the bus wouldn't come at all... It was less of a hassle, frankly, to drive my kid to and from school every day, which is what I decided to do for the next 12 years. Saved me time.

It's insane how different childhood is these days than when I was a kid. I've tried to raise mine to be fairly independent, all things considered.
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22-03-2017, 06:21 PM
RE: Are Children Overprotected or Over Idolized?
(22-03-2017 05:56 PM)julep Wrote:  
(22-03-2017 05:02 PM)onlinebiker Wrote:  I observe neighbors who get up early, on their day off work to go sit at the end of the drive - waiting for their fucking kid's school bus.....

Hint - don't act surprised when you find your over-dependant ankle biter still living at home when they turn 35........

Many school districts now have rules that require parents to be waiting for the kids, or the kids aren't allowed off the bus. Just FYI.

Our district only had that for kindergarteners.

That was a total pain in the butt. My older kid knew exactly what to do if I didn't beat the bus home. He'd go into the basement and start his homework. Younger kid too knew this.

It only happened twice both times because I got stuck BEHIND the blasted school bus.

One time the bus driver wouldn't leave because I didn't open the front door. My older son (he was in 4th grade) had my younger son by the hand, pointing to me sitting in my car stuck behind the red flashing lights.

I had to physically leave my car in the middle of road, walk 40 feet to my front door, unlock it and then walk back to get my car.


But as if to knock me down, reality came around
And without so much as a mere touch, cut me into little pieces

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22-03-2017, 08:10 PM
RE: Are Children Overprotected or Over Idolized?
Ahhhh babysitting...had some good kids, awesome kids...and then some kids who locked me out of the house and threw eggs at me.

Ignorance is not to be ignored.

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23-03-2017, 04:32 AM
RE: Are Children Overprotected or Over Idolized?
(22-03-2017 05:56 PM)julep Wrote:  
(22-03-2017 05:02 PM)onlinebiker Wrote:  I observe neighbors who get up early, on their day off work to go sit at the end of the drive - waiting for their fucking kid's school bus.....

Hint - don't act surprised when you find your over-dependant ankle biter still living at home when they turn 35........

Many school districts now have rules that require parents to be waiting for the kids, or the kids aren't allowed off the bus. Just FYI.

That the school district has such rules is even worse.

Instead of it being one compulsively overprotective mother, it's a cabal of the goddamned bitches......


If I were the poor kid, I'd run off and join the circus.

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23-03-2017, 05:36 PM
RE: Are Children Overprotected or Over Idolized?
(23-03-2017 04:32 AM)onlinebiker Wrote:  
(22-03-2017 05:56 PM)julep Wrote:  Many school districts now have rules that require parents to be waiting for the kids, or the kids aren't allowed off the bus. Just FYI.

That the school district has such rules is even worse.

Instead of it being one compulsively overprotective mother, it's a cabal of the goddamned bitches......


If I were the poor kid, I'd run off and join the circus.
Well probably did that a century back, generally those are special needs, down sysdrome, autistic, whatnot.

...but also some districts have the age cutoff so low. Like 1st graders are fine to walk but they gotta be scariedy.

But unless I live in the wrong places, I've not really experienced the whole over idolization stereotypes ever in my life, apart from not beating kids I still see most parents ignore a kid excited about something dumb like making a collage or yell at them dropping a pop up in baseball ain't okay.

"Allow there to be a spectrum in all that you see" - Neil Degrasse Tyson
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23-03-2017, 05:48 PM (This post was last modified: 24-03-2017 03:41 PM by Leerob.)
RE: Are Children Overprotected or Over Idolized?
I think there are more and more parents over-anything with their kids. Overly protective, overly caring, etc.
Kids are not kids anymore for many parents. They are status symbols and they are little snowflakes and little kings and queens.

Getting annoyed at something that a child (be it your own or the one you are babysitting) is fine and it is also fine to show this to the child. It just depends on how you show it.
So in your case, the annoying 1-minute-song. Absolutely fine to say "ok one more and then stop it because it's really annoying". Yelling or rolling eyes etc is not a good reaction because that child won't learn from that. Telling them why they have to stop makes more sense as long as you don't over-explain and over-discuss it (as so many parents do nowadays... damn I hate those)

btw i am not talking out of my ass here. I am not a parent right now but I used to work in child care. I had all those little princesses and princes at work. And how relieved they usually where when their parents dropped them off and now they got proper direction and normal treatment at the daycare. I would absolutely tell a child off, put them in a time-out, or tell them that they need to wait for a minute. Kids need limits instead of pedestals and who else is supposed to teach them limits. Yes some things are self-regulating in a child but a lot of things need direction from an adult so they can learn how the world works. If I grow up the little princess, they will have a very traumatic and rude awakening once I am 21 and moving out into the real world...
I could ramble on about this topic for days...

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23-03-2017, 05:53 PM
RE: Are Children Overprotected or Over Idolized?
(22-03-2017 09:10 AM)Ruby Crystal Wrote:  ... Just because they smelled like sour milk and who knows where else their hands have been. I hate being touched by kids, and I wasn't a kid friendly person.

LOL... I love the "sour milk" aversion. I have that too. All little kids have that funny smell; either that or that unsubtle urine smell. Ewww...

I'm not and never have been kid-friendly either, and I hate them touching me with their moist, grubby little hands too. There's certainly nothing wrong with that, and like me, you may never wanna have kids—which is also okay despite numerous parenting friends telling you bullshit like "they're the best thing that ever happened to me" or "you'll adore them once you have them" or the fucking absolute most preposterous one "who'll look after you when you get old?"

Certainly not your kids!

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