As a parent, what was it like to find out your child is transgender?
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28-06-2017, 03:31 PM
RE: As a parent, what was it like to find out your child is transgender?
(28-06-2017 03:29 PM)ImFred Wrote:  I'd let my wife decide.

Laugh out load I guess that's one way to handle it!

I hope you don't think I was picking on you! I am honestly curious how other people might feel about this because I'm in my little bubble, and most people don't ever have to think about it.
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28-06-2017, 06:36 PM
RE: As a parent, what was it like to find out your child is transgender?
(28-06-2017 03:31 PM)Emma Wrote:  
(28-06-2017 03:29 PM)ImFred Wrote:  I'd let my wife decide.

Laugh out load I guess that's one way to handle it!

I hope you don't think I was picking on you! I am honestly curious how other people might feel about this because I'm in my little bubble, and most people don't ever have to think about it.

I could tell you about how my parents reacted when I was caught wearing girls clothes..... I'm pretty sure I'm not transgendered, but... how do I put it... ah fuck it kids do shit and parents beat them up for it. That's all.

(I got beat up for it a lot when I was age 10-15, then I stopped wearing girls clothes)

DLJ Wrote:And, yes, the principle of freedom of expression works both ways... if someone starts shit, better shit is the best counter-argument.
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28-06-2017, 08:44 PM
RE: As a parent, what was it like to find out your child is transgender?
(28-06-2017 06:36 PM)JesseB Wrote:  
(28-06-2017 03:31 PM)Emma Wrote:  Laugh out load I guess that's one way to handle it!

I hope you don't think I was picking on you! I am honestly curious how other people might feel about this because I'm in my little bubble, and most people don't ever have to think about it.

I could tell you about how my parents reacted when I was caught wearing girls clothes..... I'm pretty sure I'm not transgendered, but... how do I put it... ah fuck it kids do shit and parents beat them up for it. That's all.

(I got beat up for it a lot when I was age 10-15, then I stopped wearing girls clothes)

That isn't transgender, it's cross-dressing. It ain't even homosecksual! Nothing wrong with that, either. Sorry to see that you went through this.
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28-06-2017, 08:56 PM
RE: As a parent, what was it like to find out your child is transgender?
I mean these as serious questions

If you think your gender is biologically misaligned does that mean it really is

And is there a difference between thinking you think something and actually thinking it

And does thinking become knowing at a certain point of maturity.

And are more non-bigoted people starting to view sexual and gender identity as more fluid

How much of it biology and how much of it social construct and how much does that matter?
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28-06-2017, 09:17 PM (This post was last modified: 28-06-2017 09:20 PM by JesseB.)
RE: As a parent, what was it like to find out your child is transgender?
(28-06-2017 08:44 PM)Fireball Wrote:  
(28-06-2017 06:36 PM)JesseB Wrote:  I could tell you about how my parents reacted when I was caught wearing girls clothes..... I'm pretty sure I'm not transgendered, but... how do I put it... ah fuck it kids do shit and parents beat them up for it. That's all.

(I got beat up for it a lot when I was age 10-15, then I stopped wearing girls clothes)

That isn't transgender, it's cross-dressing. It ain't even homosecksual! Nothing wrong with that, either. Sorry to see that you went through this.

Yea... I know.... and thank you Smile

I had this weird thought as a kid, my dad always wanted daughters and my parents were pretty honest about that. I was beaten up all the time, and I saw my dad treat my mom well (at least from my perspective as an ignorant child) and he treated other girls well.... So that may have played into the fantasy I had as a child of wishing I had been born a girl, and in fact I still wish that... But at no point did I feel confused, or like... idk I never felt I was a girl at all. That's not to take away from real trans people it's just acknowledging that I very much wasn't trans myself. For this reason I'd say trans is likely biological in my personal opinion. and I think the argument of biology vs social constructionist matters a lot, if you remove biology from the equation then the argument of it's ok to be Gay because it's natural and biological and not something that can be changed also goes out the window. But frankly I think there's an argument to be made that it's mostly biological on all accounts, I've seen studies and data that would seem to indicate a strong biological component. For now I'm satisfied with this conclusion.

Still... If there was a way for me to do over as a girl... I would. If there was a way to swap into a female body or a female robot body (like the Major in Ghost in the shell) hell ya I would, without hesitation. I don't see gender as being that important or big a deal personally.... but then I play female in games all the time and idk it's just not that big a deal either way. Mostly I think I just would like to be pretty >.>

#forevertheuglyduck

DLJ Wrote:And, yes, the principle of freedom of expression works both ways... if someone starts shit, better shit is the best counter-argument.
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28-06-2017, 09:22 PM
RE: As a parent, what was it like to find out your child is transgender?
(28-06-2017 09:17 PM)JesseB Wrote:  
(28-06-2017 08:44 PM)Fireball Wrote:  That isn't transgender, it's cross-dressing. It ain't even homosecksual! Nothing wrong with that, either. Sorry to see that you went through this.

Yea... I know.... and thank you Smile

I had this weird thought as a kid, my dad always wanted daughters and my parents were pretty honest about that. I was beaten up all the time, and I saw my dad treat my mom well (at least from my perspective as an ignorant child) and he treated other girls well.... So that may have played into the fantasy I had as a child of wishing I had been born a girl, and in fact I still wish that... But at no point did I feel confused, or like... idk I never felt I was a girl at all. That's not to take away from real trans people it's just acknowledging that I very much wasn't trans myself. For this reason I'd say trans is likely biological in my personal opinion. and I think the argument of biology vs social constructionist matters a lot, if you remove biology from the equation then the argument of it's ok to be Gay because it's natural and biological and not something that can be changed also goes out the window. But frankly I think there's an argument to be made that it's mostly biological on all accounts, I've seen studies and data that would seem to indicate a strong biological component. For now I'm satisfied with this conclusion.

Still... If there was a way for me to do over as a girl... I would. If there was a way to swap into a female body or a female robot body (like the Major in Ghost in the shell) hell ya I would, without hesitation. I don't see gender as being that important or big a deal personally.... but then I play female in games all the time and idk it's just not that big a deal either way. Mostly I think I just would like to be pretty >.>

Well, for every scraggly horse, there's a scraggly bush to tie it to. Just saying. You would do well to get out of Dodge and find people who accept you for who you are.
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28-06-2017, 09:30 PM
RE: As a parent, what was it like to find out your child is transgender?
(28-06-2017 09:22 PM)Fireball Wrote:  
(28-06-2017 09:17 PM)JesseB Wrote:  Yea... I know.... and thank you Smile

I had this weird thought as a kid, my dad always wanted daughters and my parents were pretty honest about that. I was beaten up all the time, and I saw my dad treat my mom well (at least from my perspective as an ignorant child) and he treated other girls well.... So that may have played into the fantasy I had as a child of wishing I had been born a girl, and in fact I still wish that... But at no point did I feel confused, or like... idk I never felt I was a girl at all. That's not to take away from real trans people it's just acknowledging that I very much wasn't trans myself. For this reason I'd say trans is likely biological in my personal opinion. and I think the argument of biology vs social constructionist matters a lot, if you remove biology from the equation then the argument of it's ok to be Gay because it's natural and biological and not something that can be changed also goes out the window. But frankly I think there's an argument to be made that it's mostly biological on all accounts, I've seen studies and data that would seem to indicate a strong biological component. For now I'm satisfied with this conclusion.

Still... If there was a way for me to do over as a girl... I would. If there was a way to swap into a female body or a female robot body (like the Major in Ghost in the shell) hell ya I would, without hesitation. I don't see gender as being that important or big a deal personally.... but then I play female in games all the time and idk it's just not that big a deal either way. Mostly I think I just would like to be pretty >.>

Well, for every scraggly horse, there's a scraggly bush to tie it to. Just saying. You would do well to get out of Dodge and find people who accept you for who you are.

I hope one day I can get out of here (soon), and I hope I can find a place where people accept me for who I am.

DLJ Wrote:And, yes, the principle of freedom of expression works both ways... if someone starts shit, better shit is the best counter-argument.
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29-06-2017, 02:21 AM
RE: As a parent, what was it like to find out your child is transgender?
I wouldn't mind generally but I would know the struggles, so yeah.

About my mom. I am not sure how she'd react. Either thinking that it's a phase, or thinking I lost my mind, or a simple "I don't care" like when I came out bi to her. But I know for sure, there wouldn't be a huge tragedy about it like it might be in other families. My mom is pretty laid back.

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29-06-2017, 02:43 AM
RE: As a parent, what was it like to find out your child is transgender?
Emma, for what it's worth I've talked and listened to you and I think you're an intelligent and remarkably beautiful woman (I hope saying so doesn't make your wife jelly lol), and hmm, my personal opinion if you or anyone else came out transgender and people can't see the value in who you are and how awesome you are, accepting you for you and not wanting to change you... well then they are really missing out on knowing a pretty awesome person.

For what my little opinion is worth

DLJ Wrote:And, yes, the principle of freedom of expression works both ways... if someone starts shit, better shit is the best counter-argument.
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29-06-2017, 03:08 AM
RE: As a parent, what was it like to find out your child is transgender?
Wouldn't be an issue for me, I would just hope she would see that as well, and wouldn't feel the need to "come out" as it were. There is telling somebody something in confidence, and then the way that I associate "coming out" with, which is mainly in fear/apprehension of the other persons reaction.

Me and my wife discussed it many years ago, "what if our daughter is gay/bi/trans/whatever" and it never was an issue for me. My wife said she wouldn't be too impressed, however has since said differently, I think now she has friends who are a lesbian couple.

Oh well, regardless, at least I'd be there for support.

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