As a parent, what was it like to find out your child is transgender?
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30-06-2017, 01:15 PM
RE: As a parent, what was it like to find out your child is transgender?
Doing that delayed puberty stuff would force people's hand in real life.
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30-06-2017, 02:28 PM
RE: As a parent, what was it like to find out your child is transgender?
(30-06-2017 01:15 PM)ImFred Wrote:  Doing that delayed puberty stuff would force people's hand in real life.

I don't understand what you mean. How would it force someone's hand? And force them to do what?
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30-06-2017, 02:33 PM
RE: As a parent, what was it like to find out your child is transgender?
Make a decision.

Saying you support your child to be whatever they want is one thing. Putting it into action is another. Talk is cheap.
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04-07-2017, 05:45 AM
RE: As a parent, what was it like to find out your child is transgender?
I wouldn't have any personal issue with a child being transgender / gay / whatever other than concern for the extra hardship such a life would impose on them ... but that'd be something out of my control.

When it comes to transgender the biggest thing that would impact parenting is just the whole decision tree around how to manage it, hormone blocking or therapy, surgery options, and the near-total lack of societal support for those special issues. I do believe that the most successful gender reassignments are started early, but that's a lot for a child to go through. Also in the mix, of course, is paying for it all if you live in the US. Honestly if I had one of those kids who so strongly identifies with the opposite gender that it's obvious by the time they're out of toddlerhood that they need gender reassignment, I'd find another country to obtain citizenship in that provides proper healthcare for its citizens and doesn't have an issue with gender reassignment. It would likely be worth the disruption and hardship.
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04-07-2017, 06:56 AM
RE: As a parent, what was it like to find out your child is transgender?
https://pjmedia.com/parenting/2017/06/07...edium=post
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04-07-2017, 07:24 AM
RE: As a parent, what was it like to find out your child is transgender?
This one actually touches on some interesting points

https://youtu.be/9L2jyEDwpEw
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05-07-2017, 10:07 AM
RE: As a parent, what was it like to find out your child is transgender?
(04-07-2017 07:24 AM)ImFred Wrote:  This one actually touches on some interesting points

https://youtu.be/9L2jyEDwpEw

I watched the whole video, and I absolutely agree that she makes good points. I still advocate for hormone blockers, however.

As more people come to some understanding of their gender identities (or lack there-of, I suppose?) and gender non-conforming behaviors, we're going to see some overlap between where this woman stands and where trans individuals lie. She's right that it's super messy, especially right now- when the medical world is struggling to understand and treat trans people respectfully and fully without harmful gate keeping. And none of that negates the need to treat trans youth in the best and safest way possible- and that includes blocking secondary sex-characteristics from developing for the wrong sex.

I don't agree with Julia Serano's definition of transgender either. We're all still figuring this out, as a whole, and the past has been especially brutal to trans people. Like a pendulum, it's likely to swing farther to the other side, now. Hopefully we'll find that balance quicker, though, than we have for allowing trans people to suffer. And that balance would likely include some gate-keeping and strong therapy to identify the gender non-conforming individuals who are maybe closer to trans than cis, but where transition would be an inappropriate treatment.
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07-07-2017, 08:43 AM
RE: As a parent, what was it like to find out your child is transgender?
(04-07-2017 07:24 AM)ImFred Wrote:  This one actually touches on some interesting points

https://youtu.be/9L2jyEDwpEw

By the way, thank you for sharing this. Those who de-transition are an important part of the trans story. And this has given me some things to think about and another side of this important story!

Trans people do tend to overlook de-transitioners, but that's because religious and anti-trans people tend to over-emphasize the likelyhood and prominence of people de-transitioning as a way of pushing trans people away from taking steps to transition. As a result, trans people tend to de-emphasize is as much as possible.

I can't count the number of times I've had to combat this message in my own transition. People from family to friends to strangers on the internet have told me that I am likely to de-transition, but the message came most strongly from my father- who now doesn't speak to me. So, being confronted with this reality carries some rather painful baggage with it for myself and many other trans people.

But, the fact will remain that there will be people who de-transition. And there are problems that will exist within the push for trans acceptance. Just like there will be problems with any movement. I have disagreements with other trans people over a bunch of different things, and had even been blocked by some prominent trans people on twitter for that disagreement.

Maybe the solution is not allowing HRT until 18? I don't know, but hormone blockers are still a must, for the sake of physical and mental health of trans people.
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