Assistance for a Fellow Atheist?
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17-05-2012, 02:02 PM
Assistance for a Fellow Atheist?
I've recently found myself in a rather unique situation and I feel that some advice from other Atheists would help me here. I've been an Atheist for three years now. I had never really been into church or the Bible, and thus my parents were more curious than angry with me when a friend told their mom and their mom confronted my parents about it(though they did make me go to church 5x as much). They thought it was a phase, but after a while, they began to realize that I was serious about this and simply left it alone. A few weeks ago, me and my older sister were standing around in the kitchen downstairs. It was night and because I had sleep issues, and she had just come home from work, we were alone at the time. We engaged in a rather intelligent conversation, which we had suddenly started doing for the last week, and then suddenly, out of the blue, my sister said "By the way, I'm an Atheist too". At first, I was rather excited that someone in my family had actually taken the time to look at their religion.....But then I realized something. Not long before, my mom had claimed to have "Spoken to God" during a suicide attempt(Not a story for this time), and she and my grandmother, for the longest of time, had believed her to be their "Church" buddy. I can see now that they'll react rather strongly to her change of heart.....And I'm beginning to worry that they'll blame me for it, since they had walked in on me speaking to her several times before. I know for a fact that I did not influence her decision very much, if at all, but that may not be how they'll see it. I'm not going to ask my sister to keep it a secret, regardless of how unwillingly my decision came out, but I can't think of a way I'll end up dealing with this when the time -DOES- come.
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17-05-2012, 02:27 PM
RE: Assistance for a Fellow Atheist?
Oh noooooes! Church buddy has converted to the Si- the Jedi! Definitely the Jedi. The fact that our light sabers are red is just a coincidence. We are the true warriors for justice and peace. Now help me sacrifice this chicken to Satan.

Afraid there's no two ways about it, sounds like there might be a bit of unpleasantness headed your way. Just ride it out. If they came around to you being an atheist surely they must respect your sister's decision too.
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17-05-2012, 02:36 PM
RE: Assistance for a Fellow Atheist?
I can't see the problem here. Your sister is living in a modern world with a flow of new information, so to become an atheist, or rather to stop believing in Santa, is just a normal part of her growing up. If she was anything but atheist, then you would have to worry.

Smile

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17-05-2012, 02:51 PM
RE: Assistance for a Fellow Atheist?
(17-05-2012 02:36 PM)Filox Wrote:  I can't see the problem here. Your sister is living in a modern world with a flow of new information, so to become an atheist, or rather to stop believing in Santa, is just a normal part of her growing up. If she was anything but atheist, then you would have to worry.

Smile
As I stated, I don't care that She's an Atheist. It's just the reaction from my parents once she reveals it. Her converting would be much more serious than my conversion, since I had never been into church and they consider my sister their spiritual partner. Seeing as how I was the first to convert to Atheism, and how my mom's mind works, chances are, I'll be taking some serious blame and anger.
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17-05-2012, 03:00 PM
RE: Assistance for a Fellow Atheist?
I understand because I was in the same exact situation. I was the atheist in the family and also the less liked of my siblings. My father loved my brother but me and him were the exact opposite.

Well it eventually turned out my brother was an atheist and I was the one targeted even though I hardly talked to him about faith. Well even now it hasn't gotten better and my father seems to have gone more radical with some near death experiences he has been through. It is still my fault but in the end I believe you have to defend you and your siblings position and hope they understand. If they don't than I see no reason why they are your family if you are only bonded by faith rather than love.

I hope things go well and your parents understand. It is all up too them but you shouldn't back down.

"Mankind must put an end to war, or war will put an end to mankind." -John F Kennedy

The way to see by Faith is to shut the eye of Reason.” -Benjamin Franklin

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17-05-2012, 04:14 PM
RE: Assistance for a Fellow Atheist?
(17-05-2012 03:00 PM)ShirubaDangan Wrote:  I understand because I was in the same exact situation. I was the atheist in the family and also the less liked of my siblings. My father loved my brother but me and him were the exact opposite.

Well it eventually turned out my brother was an atheist and I was the one targeted even though I hardly talked to him about faith. Well even now it hasn't gotten better and my father seems to have gone more radical with some near death experiences he has been through. It is still my fault but in the end I believe you have to defend you and your siblings position and hope they understand. If they don't than I see no reason why they are your family if you are only bonded by faith rather than love.

I hope things go well and your parents understand. It is all up too them but you shouldn't back down.
It seems our situations are almost the exact same. Hopefully i'm just being paranoid about my step mother's thought processes..... My mother of birth has already called me Satanic, I don't need my step mother hating me aswell.
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17-05-2012, 05:05 PM
RE: Assistance for a Fellow Atheist?
Whatever happens, don't apologize for it. Be civil, but don't let them put you on the defensive for something you have no need to defend.
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17-05-2012, 05:19 PM
RE: Assistance for a Fellow Atheist?
Be very thankful that you have a sibling, or any family member, that is a fellow atheist.

Many of us have no such luxury.

Good luck with the turbulence you're about to deal with. If nothing else, you and your sister can work through it together.

Cheers!

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17-05-2012, 05:41 PM
RE: Assistance for a Fellow Atheist?
(17-05-2012 02:02 PM)pppgggr Wrote:  .....And I'm beginning to worry that they'll blame me for it, since they had walked in on me speaking to her several times before. I know for a fact that I did not influence her decision very much, if at all, but that may not be how they'll see it.
How can you really be sure that you didn't influence her decision very much? Even if she said that it was some other cause, the human brain is very bad at remembering where its thoughts originate from or how it arrives at a "conscious" decision. It's not as if a god touched her heart and changed her mind... it could have been because of you in part or in whole.

And I'd embrace that. Who cares if your mother blames you? She'll be upset with you whether or not you actually did it, because she's superstitious (which by definition means that she can't connect cause and effect properly).

Give your sister a "congrats" from me and let her know she's more than welcome to talk to us fellow atheists whenever she likes.

My girlfriend is mad at me. Perhaps I shouldn't have tried cooking a stick in her non-stick pan.
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17-05-2012, 06:39 PM
RE: Assistance for a Fellow Atheist?
I've recently talked to her about it again, and now she's switched from calling herself an Atheist, to calling herself Agnostic. I asked her what she meant by Agnostic, and she simply said that she has no religion, has no God, but is unsure as to whether or not there is a higher power. I told her that this means she's an Atheist. She denied it. This is a facepalm moment for me. Though this did solve my predicament, it also means that my sister has no idea what she's talking about.
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