Basic Training.
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13-12-2012, 12:17 PM
Basic Training.
My boyfriend, who I am seriously committed to, is leaving for Marine basic training in a few months.
I cannot stop thinking about the risk of him leaving me for someone else, or just leaving because he's changed his views on me.
8-10 weeks of worrying if he's going to leave me if going to suck; just thinking about it brings me to tears.

I honestly, don't know why I posted this though.
Asking for advice? Giving me insight? Cheering me up? I don't know.
Anyway yeah, I'm going to go now.
-sigh- Undecided
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13-12-2012, 12:29 PM
RE: Basic Training.
Maybe not what you want to hear, but I'm a big believer in two things that might be at play here:

1. the notion that we all judge everyone else by our own standards. By this I mean people who lie, cheat, and steal always expect others to do the same, but people who are intrinsically honest expect others to be honest too. Etc. More specifically to you, is there a chance that your own personality is such that, during those 10 weeks, if you met a hunky dude you might bail on your marine boyfriend? Is that the kind of person you are, even if you don't really want to be? Something to think about, and believe me, tons of servicemen have received "Dear John" letters for exactly this reason.

2. the notion that we often sense, or perceive, things about other people and our environment that we don't even consciously know. Could it be that you've sensed that your boyfriend is much less committed to you than you are to him? Could you have perceived, maybe only subconsciously, that he's drifting away, losing interest, or whatever, and your subconscious is the part of you that's worrying your and bringing you to tears - maybe that's your subconscious trying to warn you?

Now, I'm not saying either of those things are true. Nor am I accusing you of something. But, in my experience, this is how people behave and how people react to what is going on around them. A lot.

So ask yourself if either or both of these two things might be applicable. If it's the first one, maybe he's totally loyal to you and your fears are a transposition of your own personality onto him. If it's the second one, well, time to write this one off because he almost certainly is.

But, if it's neither one, then maybe you're just worrying over nothing. Calm down and talk to him, share your concerns, enjoy the few months you have before he goes and make the most of them - if he's a good man and you are as committed as you say you are, then he'll be back.

In short, figure out if there is a real reason (yours or his) for your worries and plan accordingly, but if there's no real reason then stop worrying and enjoy your time together.

"Whores perform the same function as priests, but far more thoroughly." - Robert A. Heinlein
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13-12-2012, 02:49 PM
RE: Basic Training.
Solution:
You join the army too.
Drinking Beverage

It was just a fucking apple man, we're sorry okay? Please stop the madness Laugh out load
~Izel
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13-12-2012, 02:55 PM
RE: Basic Training.
(13-12-2012 02:49 PM)Erxomai Wrote:  Solution:
You join the army too.
Drinking Beverage
Umm, no. She's under-age.

Skepticism is not a position; it is an approach to claims.
Science is not a subject, but a method.
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13-12-2012, 03:21 PM
Basic Training.
(13-12-2012 02:55 PM)Chas Wrote:  
(13-12-2012 02:49 PM)Erxomai Wrote:  Solution:
You join the army too.
Drinking Beverage
Umm, no. She's under-age.

Meh. Plenty of underage people have signed up. A coworker went to Nam when he was 17.

It was just a fucking apple man, we're sorry okay? Please stop the madness Laugh out load
~Izel
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