Becoming The Demon
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04-05-2013, 04:39 AM (This post was last modified: 04-05-2013 07:36 AM by Luminon.)
RE: Becoming The Demon
Hey, Misantropik! Looks like you're living inside your body and want to show who's inside.

OK, I think I understand. In my experience, psychologic changes very often go hand in hand with the need to make bodily changes. If you don't make these changes, they often develop into some disease (probably psychosomatic) and the place will need to be cut anyway.
I want to tell you, that this is not about demons or changes of appearance, this is about experiencing the pain, cuts, piercings and so on. This is about the physical experience. A surgery without anaesthesia (or perhaps with) would do the same thing, the nerve system needs a shock, a trauma to shake itself from the current style of function into another.
I say, don't spare yourself, cut and pierce exactly where you want as much as you need, but understand that this is a very private thing that is right for you at this moment. It has nothing to do with people around or with your future.

I had lots of mole removals and quite extensive dentist works (still ongoing). I had my long hair cut and I have fought hard for years against parents and idiots to keep them growing. And I had extensive psycho-spiritually-emotional changes during that. However, that means nothing to nobody I know. If I had made some permanently visible changes, I think that would stifle my development, it would make people put me into the category of weirdos with tattoos, piercings and so on, who are likely more dumb, poor and violent than I actually am. If you think you have a potential and can become something more than now, avoid modifying your body and image in such a way that would later prove to be an obstacle. I'm not done developing yet and I wouldn't want to affix the current state into my image. Are you?

In my opinion, what you are planning to do is basically a form of acupuncture in all senses.

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04-05-2013, 08:00 AM
RE: Becoming The Demon
(04-05-2013 01:24 AM)Misanthropik Wrote:  
(03-05-2013 10:10 PM)Chas Wrote:  You have an obsessive - compulsive idea, a fixation. This is temporary thing. Get over it.

I am not a stranger to this kind of obsessive behavior, just not body modification. Do nothing. Wait.

I intend to wait, Chas. My largest obstacle is the overall cost, but I also wish to make sure that I am absolutely certain of this choice. As I've said: that's why I posted this in the first place. I'm not going to butcher my body on a whim.

With that said, you must also understand that while I respect you and your views - more than the majority of the others here, to be frank - I must also take what you say with a grain of salt. Perhaps a little more. I'm of course not trying to be offensive, but the cranky-old-codger-who-can't-believe-damn-kids-put-metal-in-their-noses-and-paint-their-hair-green-these-days routine is fairly obvious. It's shown itself several times, and specifically when the topic of conversation was the altering of one's body in unusual ways. (But then, what is "usual"?)

So, while I respect your view(s) and take what you and others say, have said, or might say into consideration, I also consider the source(s) and any possible biases which may be present. I also bear in mind the fact that I'm not a stranger to obsession or disorder either. I've lived with it for some time. It's one of those things that has made me feel at a loss for control. And I'm so familiar with it that, at this point, I can tell the difference between a psychological fixation based upon disturbance, and a genuine desire based upon whatever my personal preferences so choose to base it upon.

In the end, if I go through with it and regret it in 20 years; tough titty for me. But right now, it's a desireable pursuit, and I intend to entertain it as a viable and favorable possibility.

You can be dismissive of a 'cranky old codger', but that is the easy, lazy response.

I'm responding from a vantage of concern and experience.
Consider the possibility that your thoughts are obsessive and unhealthy.

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04-05-2013, 04:14 PM (This post was last modified: 04-05-2013 04:21 PM by amyb.)
RE: Becoming The Demon
Quote: Mutilation is something we strive to avoid in most cases
That's why people involved in body modification call it "modification," as in "change," not "mutilation" in the sense of destroying or disfiguring something. I used to be heavily involved in the BM scene online and offline and even ran into people who were into amputation. I won't go into that, but the idea was that if you remove a foot because you want to remove a foot, it is not mutilation. If someone else removes your foot against your will, it IS mutilation. (Again, not getting into the psychological implications of removing a foot or limb.) I've also encountered people who did strange things with their genitals, because they wanted to. I'd say also: if someone holds you down and cuts off your dick against your will, that person is an asshole and you have been mutilated. If you have sexual reassignment surgery and a doctor cuts off your dick, you've been modified but not mutilated.

Quote:What such people fail to understand is that it’s not about fitting in or looking cool or even worrying about “getting a job” later on.
Verily. But the problem is most people see it as young people getting trendy tattoos to fit in and for people to think they're cool. And more people have been getting tattoos in the past 15 or 20 years, different kinds of people, different ages, etc. I mean it's not just sailors and gang members anymore, but people haven't moved on mentally to think people might do these things for themselves. I think it's a symptom of a culture where people do things for the approval of others. If you're fat and want to lose weight, the commercials targeting you say you'll be "sexy", they don't say you'll be "healthier." The implication is that the only reason to lose weight (which is changing your body, in a way) is to get the approval of the opposite (or same) sex.

As a woman, my most hated thing to hear is when people find out I have tattoos on my stomach and chest, and they say "those are gonna look bad when you get pregnant." I have no intention of every breeding, so that is annoying to me. For another thing, they are assuming I give a shit what they think of my tattoos (which they haven't even seen, likely), or what anyone thinks of them. People are also oftentimes confused as to why I have a lot of tattoos in some places people don't see all the time. I didn't get them for them to see.

Related: "Those are gonna look bad when you're 80." As if ANY part of me is going to look GOOD at 80. WTF.
I would argue that piercings are reversible, also.

Quote:For this reason, I feel it’s rather fitting to manifest this transformation into a living symbol; one which will become the most literal interpretation of the “demonic” metaphor possible. With a pair of black talons curving from my chin, one could be forgiven for viewing them as a kind of metal goatee. This is where my idea originally took root; given that many Christian interpretations of demons or devils sport a sinister goatee on their chin
And this is probably why I think goatees are sexy, it goes back to my christian roots. ^_^

Quote: As I've said: that's why I posted this in the first place. I'm not going to butcher my body on a whim
That too. Many assume people get piercings or tattoos because they were drunk and crazy one night, which is often quite far from the truth. Personally, i thought about my tattoos sometimes for 5+ years before getting them.

Another thing is this, and I'm gonna have trouble explaining, but people seem to over-value some things. I remember when I got Norplant (hormonal birth control) they had to put a small incision (1/2 inch) in my upper arm, and they made me sign things, told me it might scar, etc like it was end of the fucking world. A half inch scar on the inside of my upper left arm. I have trouble understanding why such a scar would ever bother anybody, ever. Even if you work as a model, no one would notice that shit. I'm fucking covered in scars on my arms and legs from doing dangerous shit as a kid/teenager. And I'm amazed when I see products to reduce the appearance of scars and they show some lady with a tiny scar on her arm, who is apparently very self conscious about this tiny thing. But anyway, I think that all feeds into it, the idea of not having society's idea of a "perfect" body. This is also why it annoys me when people say I will regret my tattoos. For one thing, they don't know me well enough to say that. And for another, I see my tattoos as part of me, and representing what I felt like having a tattoo of at that point in time, therefore, also a part of my past. There is nothing to regret. I don't care if I won't be able to be an underwear model at age 92 or whatever.

Sorry for this rambling...

ETA:
Quote:If I had made some permanently visible changes, I think that would stifle my development, it would make people put me into the category of weirdos with tattoos, piercings and so on, who are likely more dumb, poor and violent than I actually am. If you think you have a potential and can become something more than now, avoid modifying your body and image in such a way that would later prove to be an obstacle. I'm not done developing yet and I wouldn't want to affix the current state into my image. Are you?
If you have to be done developing personally, no one would have any piercings or tattoos until they were on their deathbed. Also, some people feel at home with the "weirdos." And if people don't realize that smart and decent people modify their bodies, nothing will ever change the stigma attached to it and the stereotype of dumb, violent brutes with piercings and tattoos.

TLBig Grinr: I don't think you should avoid doing something you want to do and are aware of the consequences of just because some small minded people may judge you for it.
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04-05-2013, 04:36 PM
RE: Becoming The Demon
There other ways of getting those feelings without them being permanent. Pain can be exhilarating and powerful, and it's a huge high to get to the level where the mind floats.

But as I said, that can be achieved without permanently modifying your body. And it can be done more often.


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Wind's in the east, a mist coming in
Like something is brewing and about to begin
Can't put my finger on what lies in store
but I feel what's to happen has happened before...


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04-05-2013, 05:12 PM
RE: Becoming The Demon
(04-05-2013 04:36 PM)Momsurroundedbyboys Wrote:  There other ways of getting those feelings without them being permanent. Pain can be exhilarating and powerful, and it's a huge high to get to the level where the mind floats.

But as I said, that can be achieved without permanently modifying your body. And it can be done more often.

It was my understanding that he had a physical transformation/goal in mind, not that he just wanted an endorphin high from pain, see following quote:

Misanthropik Wrote:I intend to wait, Chas. My largest obstacle is the overall cost, but I also wish to make sure that I am absolutely certain of this choice. As I've said: that's why I posted this in the first place. I'm not going to butcher my body on a whim.
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04-05-2013, 05:27 PM
RE: Becoming The Demon
(04-05-2013 05:12 PM)amyb Wrote:  
(04-05-2013 04:36 PM)Momsurroundedbyboys Wrote:  There other ways of getting those feelings without them being permanent. Pain can be exhilarating and powerful, and it's a huge high to get to the level where the mind floats.

But as I said, that can be achieved without permanently modifying your body. And it can be done more often.

It was my understanding that he had a physical transformation/goal in mind, not that he just wanted an endorphin high from pain, see following quote:

Misanthropik Wrote:I intend to wait, Chas. My largest obstacle is the overall cost, but I also wish to make sure that I am absolutely certain of this choice. As I've said: that's why I posted this in the first place. I'm not going to butcher my body on a whim.

You're probably right but I was referring to mostly this passage:


(03-05-2013 05:24 PM)Misanthropik Wrote:  .

When I sat down in that medical chair; watching my piercer, Aaron, sterilize his tools and unpacking his needles, I felt something which is only felt at certain intervals in an individual's life. I felt a sense of power. There was to be pain involved, yes, but I was consciously choosing to endure it, and that gave me power. My body was not born into this world with steel talons affixed to my lower lip, and in choosing to add something which was contrary to nature; I found power. And when finally I felt the piercing shrill of the needle as it skewered my flesh; piercing the muscle tissue below and emerging from the other side, twice, I felt not only power, but a sense of total liberation. A sense of leaping from a mountainous peak and freefalling into absolute freedom. The purest sense of potential at my front and the chains of reservation and fear left far behind. It was an exhilarating experience, and one who's gravity I did not fully comprehend until later; when I was afforded ample time for reflection.

And that is why I said what I did earlier. I would also argue its not really an endorphin high from simply pain, but also the anticipation.


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Wind's in the east, a mist coming in
Like something is brewing and about to begin
Can't put my finger on what lies in store
but I feel what's to happen has happened before...


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04-05-2013, 05:35 PM
RE: Becoming The Demon
Ah, I see. When I read that part, I interpreted it as the "power" to take control over the form of one's own body, and that the feelings involved were noteworthy but only secondary to the main goal.
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04-05-2013, 05:41 PM
RE: Becoming The Demon
Could be. I just saw it from a different perspective is all. Like I said you're probably right.


[Image: mrhanky.jpg]

Wind's in the east, a mist coming in
Like something is brewing and about to begin
Can't put my finger on what lies in store
but I feel what's to happen has happened before...


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04-05-2013, 06:13 PM
RE: Becoming The Demon
(04-05-2013 05:35 PM)amyb Wrote:  Ah, I see. When I read that part, I interpreted it as the "power" to take control over the form of one's own body, and that the feelings involved were noteworthy but only secondary to the main goal.

Pretty much this. People who have a deep desire to have children still enjoy the sex needed to make them.


I'm gonna start copyrighting my metaphors, by the way. Drinking Beverage

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04-05-2013, 06:22 PM
RE: Becoming The Demon
Years ago when I was 100% into my fitness, MMA and Krav Maga I used to consider my body as a "machine".... so much so that I wanted the word "Machine" tattooed on my forearm as a constant reminder.

Looking back I'm glad I never had it done as things have changed since. That's not me saying you shouldn't have it done Mis. At the end of the day its your body and your life, however I wouldn't be too quick to "shun" the warnings given to you by the older generations on this board.

Im glad your having a good hard long think about it. Sadly people will judge you everywhere you go because of it, going for job interviews you will put people off no matter how qualified and how polite you may be (id wager 95% just wouldn't take the "risk" plus you are representing somebody's company/business, your image would become their image)

Im 32 years old, compared to how I used to be I am now a very boring old cunt and Instead of going for wild ladies, partying all night, putting a front on with my image of looking "badass"... I have grown up out of those things for the most part, thats why I previously said try not to be quick to "shun" the advice of elders as you may think they may not emapthise with your decision, but do you remember when you were an adolescent teen and nobody seemed to understand the raging hormones and changes going through your body then??? How much advice can you look back on that you never took on but had to experience yourself, the old sayings that you probably laughed at that you may now be passing onto the next generations yourself???

If it was just a pain and liberation thing then go for suspension. Have some hooks whacked through your chest/back/arms and get hung up and swung around. There are places/conventions that do it. I'm not trying to second guess why you want it done but to me if you did it is a permanent externalisation to the outside world, it is a statement that you wish others to judge you by, be it cool, distastefull, rebelious, careless, intimidating, and millions of other words that I am too tired to write down.

Id defo have a looooooooooonnnnnnnnnnng hard think about having it done.

For no matter how much I use these symbols, to describe symptoms of my existence.
You are your own emphasis.
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