Breaking silence
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06-07-2013, 09:27 PM
RE: Breaking silence
HG,
Counseling can really help if you find the right therapist for what you have going on. I had my doubts but when I broke from my mother I went to a few sessions with a woman that got me through it so much easier than what I had been through alone. She also counseled a good friend who broke from the JWs and left her daughter behind.

That doctor was so calming, understanding, and helpful. It may be worth a shot. Sometimes we get so deep into our own heads that we need some fresh eyes to help us see things more clearly. She told me that I didn't have to carry the burden alone...telling her gave part of it to her and eased my load. Talking to her really helped.

I am sorry this has been so hard on you on so many levels.

See here they are, the bruises, some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF
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06-07-2013, 09:42 PM
RE: Breaking silence
When I lived in Philly there was a pedophile who lived in the same condo where my wife and I resided. The Pedo was a local High School coach and well thought of in the local community. On Friday and Saturday nights, he would almost as a ruule bring a young boy back to his apartment after he had taken him to a Hockey, baseball, Football or Basketball game...or whatever.

On Friday and Saturday nights, he would almost as a rule bring a young boy back to his apartment late at night. Me and some neighbors got suspicious and we watched him and kept notes. Finally, one of the neighbors got enough evidence such that he was confident enough to go to the local police and inform them of his suspicions. When he told the local Chief of Police, he was damned-near arrested - it seems that the local Police thought well of the Pedo, too and would not even consider what my neighbor was saying.

Pedos are generally master Sociopaths. They are Masters at breaking the bonds between people who know what they are up to, and those powerful enough to put a stop to their craziness. More often than not, when someone comes forward and shines the light on the Pedo, they find that they are the target and not the Pedo. Amazing. Anyways...the guy was eventually caught in a federal sting operation, but not until years later.

My cousin had an uncle who went 70 years before he finally got caught, and even then his family wouldn't believe it until some other cousins came forward and related how he had molested them as children. The, Pedos family actually asked the cousins if they would testify in court as to the Pedos good character, and it was then that these cousins made thier stories known after keeping silent for over 20 years. Also, the Pedos brother then related to the family a story of how a girl they had known 50-years earlier had comitted suicide because the Pedo abused her. It took 55 years to stop that guy. Amazing.
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07-07-2013, 01:17 AM
RE: Breaking silence
(06-07-2013 08:47 PM)Hobbitgirl Wrote:  Thanks guys. Getting that out really actually made me feel a lot better. I think I can handle things now.

(Side note) Mom you and I should hang out sometime. Terrible we live so close and havent.

I'm glad you're feeling better. Smile

And ya we should. Hug


Wind's in the east, a mist coming in
Like something is brewing and about to begin
Can't put my finger on what lies in store
but I feel what's to happen has happened before...


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07-07-2013, 01:21 AM
RE: Breaking silence
Thanks again Julius! Hug


Wind's in the east, a mist coming in
Like something is brewing and about to begin
Can't put my finger on what lies in store
but I feel what's to happen has happened before...


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07-07-2013, 05:12 AM
RE: Breaking silence
Being a normal guy with normal, loving parents and a normal, loving family I can't imagine what it's like being treated so badly by your the people you're supposed to trust. I can only imagine it's very hard.

I can only give you lots of cyber-hugs Hug

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07-07-2013, 06:31 AM
RE: Breaking silence
(06-07-2013 08:55 PM)Julius Wrote:  
(06-07-2013 05:47 PM)Momsurroundedbyboys Wrote:  Recently a thread was started that just turned my life upside down....

Yep...I know of what thread you speak, and I also think it's brought a lot of pain to many others on this forum. I am saddened to hear how it has hurt you so.

Earlier today, I carefully read the entire thread that so upset Momsurroundedbyboys, and have concluded that the thread is not what it seems to be. I mean, if I started a thread that caused so many community members grief, and caused many of them to needlessly argue amongst themselves, then I would put a stop to the my posting when I could readily see how much potential bitterness it was causing - and I think most people would do the same. But not these Pedo Guys - they post on and on and on...and don't seem to give a damn about the grief it causes or the potential fallout.

Considering this...anybody care to convince me that these guys aren't the Sociopaths I suspect them to be?

THAT!!!! YES!!! They don't give a freaking shit what they are causing!

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Science is the process we've designed to be responsible for generating our best guess as to what the fuck is going on. Girly Man
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07-07-2013, 08:50 AM
RE: Breaking silence
So what do you guys think of this remark:

Quote:simgiran Wrote: The main points I remember are: Never make the victim feel responsible for the abuse. (Unfortunately there is still too many people who do. It can make horrible harm.) Be there for the victims, tell them that what happened to may feel them bad, feel damaged and that in such case you are there for them.

Would you have preferred if your abuser had comforted you and told you he was there to support you?

As a 4 year old, I would have eaten that up and gotten further under his spell. I think it just makes it easier for the abuser to come back for more. It doesn't help the victim at all to be comforted by the abuser, quite the opposite.

What do you think?

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Science is the process we've designed to be responsible for generating our best guess as to what the fuck is going on. Girly Man
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07-07-2013, 09:12 AM (This post was last modified: 07-07-2013 09:17 AM by Bows and Arrows.)
RE: Breaking silence
the horrible part is it always starts with TRUST.
- trust me- I'm not evil- I'm a nice guy.
-trust me- I would never do such a thing
-trust me- I'm just like everyone else.

trust and access- its all they need.


Be excellent to each other and party on, Dudes!
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07-07-2013, 09:30 AM
RE: Breaking silence
I would like to post some general statistics (so others can learn about this issue), but I don't want to upset anyone.

If you would be ok with it, let me know. Or if you object- let me know that too.


Be excellent to each other and party on, Dudes!
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07-07-2013, 09:38 AM
RE: Breaking silence
(07-07-2013 09:30 AM)Bows and Arrows Wrote:  I would like to post some general statistics (so others can learn about this issue), but I don't want to upset anyone.

If you would be ok with it, let me know. Or if you object- let me know that too.

I'm fine with that.

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Science is the process we've designed to be responsible for generating our best guess as to what the fuck is going on. Girly Man
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