Breaking the Moral Contract
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03-09-2012, 02:42 PM
RE: Breaking the Moral Contract
(03-09-2012 08:52 AM)TrulyX Wrote:  
(02-09-2012 06:18 PM)Logica Humano Wrote:  IF the TWO AGREE and PROMISE TO EACH OTHER that their relationship (marriage or not) includes that they can only have sex with each other, and they break that promise, they are in the wrong.

I don't think that was annoying enough for all of us to get the point. Could you please try again and be more of a bitch this time?

It seemed to me like you were going back and forth just to be argumentative. I had to do something to see if that is what it was or if I could get you to stop.

It's not my fault you didn't read anything I posted. I have stated my stance three fucking times.

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03-09-2012, 03:44 PM
RE: Breaking the Moral Contract
(03-09-2012 09:11 AM)Dom Wrote:  Back to the original post:

Whether infidelity is right or wrong in your opinion has nothing to do with whether it is ok to interfere in the lives of others.

These are totally seperate issues.

I happen to think infidelity is wrong, and interfering in the lives of others is also wrong.

Two wrongs do not make a right.

I'm with Dom on this. My brother living in Tokyo is going through this now with his cheating wife. Not only would I not inject myself into this situation, I'm uncomfortable even advising my brother after he pulled me in. I got no direct experience with this. But that's what brothers are for. Best I could do was tell him that since he's already decided on divorce he needs to find a good lawyer quick and separate his income and assets from any joint accounts before the courts tell him he can't (of course since he lives in Japan, I'm not even sure of the US court system's jurisdiction even though he is technically still a resident of Delaware). And I told him I'd support him in any way I can. He's my fucking brother after all.

Trust me, Dewey, you don't want no part of this shit.

I did though bring up, "Kabukichō and Geisha Girls?" Evil_monster

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03-09-2012, 05:09 PM
RE: Breaking the Moral Contract
(03-09-2012 02:42 PM)Logica Humano Wrote:  It's not my fault you didn't read anything I posted. I have stated my stance three fucking times.

I have read your posts; that's why I responded. I could have cared less what your stance was, I just couldn't figure out why you kept being argumentative and getting offended by what Thomas was posting, then Chas, and why you felt the need to keep responding.

Maybe you should go back and read your posts, paying attention to the tone, and think about how what you were writing could have been interpreted by other people reading them.

It could be because of the type of person you are or how often you use the word 'fuck', but either way, your posts were coming off as combative and argumentative.

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04-09-2012, 02:18 PM
RE: Breaking the Moral Contract
(03-09-2012 05:09 PM)TrulyX Wrote:  
(03-09-2012 02:42 PM)Logica Humano Wrote:  It's not my fault you didn't read anything I posted. I have stated my stance three fucking times.

I have read your posts; that's why I responded. I could have cared less what your stance was, I just couldn't figure out why you kept being argumentative and getting offended by what Thomas was posting, then Chas, and why you felt the need to keep responding.

Maybe you should go back and read your posts, paying attention to the tone, and think about how what you were writing could have been interpreted by other people reading them.

It could be because of the type of person you are or how often you use the word 'fuck', but either way, your posts were coming off as combative and argumentative.

I can reply to your stuff without reading what you said.

So explain to me how one hears a tone from text?

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05-09-2012, 09:48 AM
RE: Breaking the Moral Contract
(04-09-2012 02:18 PM)Logica Humano Wrote:  So explain to me how one hears a tone from text?

I meant interpret. Sorry if I said hear?

Like if someone wrote 'fuck you, you're an idiot', you might see that and assume that the person is upset and angry with whomever the comment is directed.


I think after you responded with, "What the fuck are you talking about?", when there was no other reason to use the word 'fuck' to get a point across, that kind of made that post, and the rest of your posts, seem as if you were getting offended.

The Paradox Of Fools And Wise Men:
“The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, but wiser men so full of doubts.” ― Bertrand Russell
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05-09-2012, 11:53 AM (This post was last modified: 05-09-2012 11:58 AM by Logica Humano.)
RE: Breaking the Moral Contract
(05-09-2012 09:48 AM)TrulyX Wrote:  
(04-09-2012 02:18 PM)Logica Humano Wrote:  So explain to me how one hears a tone from text?

I meant interpret. Sorry if I said hear?

Like if someone wrote 'fuck you, you're an idiot', you might see that and assume that the person is upset and angry with whomever the comment is directed.


I think after you responded with, "What the fuck are you talking about?", when there was no other reason to use the word 'fuck' to get a point across, that kind of made that post, and the rest of your posts, seem as if you were getting offended.

You can fucking interpret anything the fuck you fucking like, you fucking fuck. It doesn't mean you are fucking right, God fucking damn it. Fuck. Wink

I said "fuck" in that instance because I was completely confused as to what Dom was talking about. Again, if you read my post you would understand my position from the beginning. Dom, however, said it was a misquote, so who cares?

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10-09-2012, 09:30 AM (This post was last modified: 10-09-2012 09:39 AM by NotSoVacuous.)
RE: Breaking the Moral Contract
Wow, this thread really took off. I'll try to jump in and reply to a lot of these later, but for now I am going to take the general idea being expressed here and tackle it.

I keep hearing that people aren't owned, thus as a partner you can do whatever you please and there is no moral contract being violated. When people decide to be in a relationship, they promise to be with each other exclusively. This is not a matter of owning someone. This is a matter of keeping your word. This contract does exist, and it is pretty straight forward. Don't like it? Don't agree to the relationship. Agree to the relationship? You are now bound to a moral code of not deceiving your partner.

Next I noticed the "Do unto others" moral philosophy brought up, and I understand that, but what I am suggesting is, are the people breaking this rule still protected by it? Simple as that. I am not sure, but I don't see me losing sleep over lying and stealing from a theif or lying, stealing and murdering a murderer. And as this thread appears to be focused on, invading the privacy of a cheater. Why isn't it my business? I would like to be explained why it isn't. Why is this person protected by a moral code that they obviously don't think exists? Isn't the only reason we are moral to people is so they are moral back? If the person is not capable/willing to deliver the same morality, then why respect them morally?

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10-09-2012, 10:11 AM
RE: Breaking the Moral Contract
...

All's fair in love and war. There are no rules. If it's your close friend then sure, you got his or her back, so if you find out about cheating you can get all angry about it and tell and so on... but otherwise... it seems a bit... weird... a bit... yeah, getting into other people's business.

I don't want some random in the street walking up to me and telling me "that girl you love isn't so great you know" - I love her remember - I'm more likely to assume "this guy's an asshole, he's got some agenda telling me this, he's trying to split us apart"... After all, why would I take the word of some jerk I met in the street over the word of the girl I love and have been going out with? Why would I even let that thought near me? Trust is very important in a relationship. If I'm with a girl, I trust her not to cheat. If she no longer likes me, I trust her to tell me and we can work stuff out. But someone trying to break the trust between us - that'd be death to any friendship I had with that person.

Those are the thoughts that go through my head when I think about what you said in the OP, that's why I wouldn't ever get involved unless it was my close friend whom I also trusted... My tone comes across kinda angry... well, yeah... love leaves its scars... Confused
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14-09-2012, 04:19 AM
RE: Breaking the Moral Contract
(29-08-2012 12:15 PM)Thomas Wrote:  Let's start with the following question:
What is cheating in a relationship?
Why do we have such a concept?

The idea that one individual owns the exclusive right to have sex with another individual is perverse. Every individual owns their own self. If a person wants to own the sex right to me I will tell them that this is my right exclusively. If at any time I choose to have sex with another individual it is my call. If I choose not to have sex with someone other than my wife, that is my call, not hers. She does not own me. I do not own her.

The concept comes from individuals who are insecure in their own person. They feel the need to control others, such as a sex partner. We make this a binding arrangement in the religious world. "Let no man break apart...."

To answer the original question, you should mind your own business. If there is an agreement between two other individuals regarding acts of sexual intercourse, it is not your concern. You are not the moral police, given that an agreement to exclusive sex rights is a moral issue at all. I don't believe that it is.

If I discovered a married friend of mine cheating, I would most certainly expose them. When I got married I made a promise to be faithful to my wife. If I were to change my mind, I would rather ask for a divorse than sneak around. I doubt that will ever happen though. If I didn't want to have such an agreement, I would never have gotten married. I would have stuck to just having girlfriends. You make an agreement with someone else, it is immoral to break the agreement. Especially since there are some nasty diseases out there. If you are married and think it is safe to have unprotected sex with your wife and it turns out she is out there screwing whoever she wants behind your back, she could infect you with any number of incurable diseases. That is part of the reason I chose to get married. I love my wife as well and also want a stable home for any kids we have. So, yes you sign away your personal sex rights when you get married. I can't say that I own the rights of my wife as far as getting in her pants whenever I want to, however she does not have the right to go screw whoever she chooses any more. Likewise for me as well. As far as outing the person in question, I might mention something in passing. Probably not though, since so many men and women consider quite a few people to be boyfriends or girlfriends at the same time. She might appear to be cheating on him, however he might be doing the same to her.
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