CHRISTIAN SEX TOYS!!
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17-07-2013, 03:51 PM
RE: CHRISTIAN SEX TOYS!!
(17-07-2013 03:49 PM)Momsurroundedbyboys Wrote:  That made me snort.

Snorting cocaine is not good for your health.

[Image: Untitled-2.png?_subject_uid=322943157&am...Y7Dzq4lJog]
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17-07-2013, 04:39 PM
RE: CHRISTIAN SEX TOYS!!
Is this really a picture of Mary Magdalene?
Consider ....and where can I get me a life sized replica? Big Grin

[Image: Mary-Magdalene.jpg]

Would they sell door to door, you think?

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17-07-2013, 04:51 PM
RE: CHRISTIAN SEX TOYS!!
(17-07-2013 03:22 PM)kingschosen Wrote:  I've seen a lot of ridiculous things in my 31 years here on earth... this ranks up there.

I mean... why "Christian"? Sex toys are sex toys. They don't have a religion.

It's possible that being a Christian clouds your judgment on this one KC, but the truth is the one thing the church likes more than God and totalitarianism is money. They are ingenious at finding a way to make a buck by taking popular secular products and either rebranding them as religious or creating knockoff copies of them. Just reference Contemporary Christian Music, social clubs, pop culture trends.....Heck, even Answers in Genesis is an attempt of the church to capitalize on "science", or at least create a disingenuous analog of PEARL.

So it's not surprising that the Church would attempt to profit off of the booming business that Adult entertainment is (Note: they even sell Porn Videos on Covenant Spice as 'romantic entertainment'.). Ads for condoms and Viagra appear nightly on television, as do ads for adult toys on late night television. Dildos and vibrators are sold openly at Walgreens and CVS stores. I'm sure this stuff knocks the average pious little Baptist out of their chair and into an indignant tirade about how Satan is attempting to corrupt the church with this filth. Nonetheless, this is what sells and the Church wants a chunk of the market for itself.

And it's fairly easy to 'Christianize' this stuff. After all, God condones sex between a husband and wife and many passages in the Bible e.g. Song of Solomon are highly erotic in nature. And as long as a married couple is using them? The Church sees no problem with that. So, off we go into the dildo business, 100% Jesus approved.

"IN THRUST WE TRUST"

"We were conservative Jews and that meant we obeyed God's Commandments until His rules became a royal pain in the ass."

- Joel Chastnoff, The 188th Crybaby Brigade
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18-07-2013, 01:13 AM
RE: CHRISTIAN SEX TOYS!!
(17-07-2013 09:34 AM)PleaseJesus Wrote:  
Quote:I thought it was all about procreation...be fruitful and multiply and all that. Sex toys aren't required for that.

A thoughtful question, thanks. Certainly, Adam and Noah were told to fill the earth when it had but a few people on it. Those were the sole people so commanded, and both testaments describe sex for pleasure and enjoyment for married couples...

Really? Please tell us where, exactly, the bible "describe sex for pleasure and enjoyment for married couples"
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18-07-2013, 01:24 AM
RE: CHRISTIAN SEX TOYS!!
(16-07-2013 11:38 AM)PleaseJesus Wrote:  
Quote:PJ...Where in the Bible does it say that sex toys are allowed for married couples? Chapter and verse if you don't mind.

Are we making an argument from silence? We know the term "sex toys" is not in the scriptures. 1) Love God supremely. 2) Love your fellow human. If it doesn't cause emotional or physical pain to your partner, why not?

RE "If it doesn't cause emotional or physical pain to your partner, why not?"

How very saucy and modern of you PJ!

BUT....Paul, the inventor of your cult, wouldn't approve.

Paul loathed his own sexuality.
“The fact is, I know of nothing good living in me—living, that is, in my unspiritual self—for though the will to do what is good is in me, the performance is not, with the result that instead of doing good the things I want to do, I carry out the sinful things I do not want. When I act against my will, then, it is not my true self doing it, but sin which lives in me…I can see my body follows a different law that battles against the law which my reason dictates…What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body doomed to death” (Rom. 7:18–24, NJB.)

Poor, pathetic Paul! Deluded with puritanical ideas, he was repulsed by his own libido and miserable. He was a suppressed, toxic little man, ill at ease with himself.

It’s no surprise he was celibate:
“I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, it is good for them if they abide even as I. But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn” (1 Cor. 7:8–9, KJV.)

To be single was quite unusual for a Pharisee, as they were expected to marry. I suspect Paul would have had difficulty finding a woman willing to live with him. Or he may have been homosexual, yet ashamed to be, so he lived “in the closet.” Whatever the case, he quite clearly had a neurosis about sex:

"For to be carnally minded is death; but to be spiritually minded is life and peace. Because the carnal mind is enmity against God: for it is not subject to the law of God, neither indeed can be. So then they that are in the flesh cannot please God. But ye are not in the flesh, but in the Spirit, if so be that the Spirit of God dwell in you. Now if any man have not the Spirit of Christ, he is none of his. And if Christ be in you, the body is dead because of sin; but the Spirit is life because of righteousness. But if the Spirit of him that raised up Jesus from the dead dwell in you, he that raised up Christ from the dead shall also quicken your mortal bodies by his Spirit that dwelleth in you. Therefore, brethren, we are debtors, not to the flesh, to live after the flesh. For if ye live after the flesh, ye shall die: but if ye through the Spirit do mortify the deeds of the body, ye shall live” (Rom. 8:6–13, KJV.)

"He wants you to keep away from fornication and each one of you to know how to use the body that belongs to him in a way that is holy and honorable, not giving away to selfish lust like the pagans who do not know God, He wants nobody at all to ever sin by taking advantage of a brother in these matters; the Lord always punishes sins of that sort, as we told you before and assured you. We have been called by God to be holy, not to be immoral” (1 Thess. 4:3–7, NJB.)

“Yes, it is a good thing for a man not to touch a woman. But since sex is always a danger, let each man have his own wife and each woman her own husband. The husband must give his wife what she has the right to expect, and so too the wife to the husband. The wife has no rights over her own body; it is the husband who has them. In the same way, the husband has no rights over his body; the wife has them. Do not refuse each other except by mutual consent, and then only for an agreed time, to leave yourselves free for prayer; then come together again in case Satan should take advantage of your weakness to tempt you” (1 Cor. 7:1–6, NJB.)

Commentary is almost superfluous. He thought sex was distasteful, an annoying but necessary nuisance, like going to the toilet. He implied people should get it over with quickly, so they could get on with praying. He thought people got married so sex was on tap. A spouse was like a convenient toilet.

From where did he get this sour, jaundiced perspective? He may have been sexually abused as a child, or had erectile difficulties, or been disgusted by his own attraction towards men, or been brainwashed with Platonic ideas about base bodily functions. He may have genuinely thought the end of the world was imminent, so it was better to not reproduce.

I think he was put out by people’s sexuality, particularly because it was way more interesting than his spiritual profundities. So he tried to control this part of people’s lives too.

While most people today quite rightly dismiss this dogma, a sizable minority doesn’t. Consider the psychological damage inflicted on millions of innocent people through their upbringings. All youngsters explore their sexuality; yet the child is often told that such behaviors—even thoughts—are sins! The consequence is guilt and shame. The underlying agenda is to get people to dislike themselves. When an ego is wounded, a person feels shame, so is easier to control. The virgin Jesus is pure and sinless, just like his mother, so jumps to the rescue, and the church has conned another customer. The punter is saved from a problem he never had in the first place.

This negativity about sex is a filthy stain that’s hard to wash out of people’s minds once it has taken root. Shame on churches for promoting this as the word of God!

Sex is a special, natural, wholesome, and beautiful part of life. It’s a private affair, so preachers should butt out of people’s personal practices.
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18-07-2013, 10:37 AM
RE: CHRISTIAN SEX TOYS!!
(13-07-2013 11:11 PM)Carlo_The_Bugsmasher_Driver Wrote:  This one.....I........I have no words for.

Covenant Spice is a mail order company that sells Christian marital aids to spice up things between you and your hubby.
http://www.covenantspice.com/

ID be intersted to see how much business they do given how uptight Christians are about sex. A pious southern baptist ordering a two headed dildo????
Jesus is also in this relationship, how could you just forget him?

Unless by "hubby" you actually did mean Jesus.
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18-07-2013, 07:47 PM
RE: CHRISTIAN SEX TOYS!!
(18-07-2013 10:37 AM)Vlad Wrote:  
(13-07-2013 11:11 PM)Carlo_The_Bugsmasher_Driver Wrote:  This one.....I........I have no words for.

Covenant Spice is a mail order company that sells Christian marital aids to spice up things between you and your hubby.
http://www.covenantspice.com/

ID be intersted to see how much business they do given how uptight Christians are about sex. A pious southern baptist ordering a two headed dildo????
Jesus is also in this relationship, how could you just forget him?

Unless by "hubby" you actually did mean Jesus.

Lol. Jesus is having a three way with married couples......which would make Jesus a bisexual. Boy, wouldn't that just drive the Westboro Baptist church up the wall!

"IN THRUST WE TRUST"

"We were conservative Jews and that meant we obeyed God's Commandments until His rules became a royal pain in the ass."

- Joel Chastnoff, The 188th Crybaby Brigade
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19-07-2013, 01:06 AM
RE: CHRISTIAN SEX TOYS!!
Buy a cross-shaped dildo, so your wife can share Jesus' pain! Only 5.5$
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19-07-2013, 01:36 AM
RE: CHRISTIAN SEX TOYS!!
@kc
they are obviously blessed.
Thats why you hear "OH GOD,OH GO00DDD" when its used

I don't really like going outside.
It's too damn "peopley" out there....
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23-07-2013, 02:11 PM
RE: CHRISTIAN SEX TOYS!!
Quote:Paul loathed his own sexuality.
“The fact is, I know of nothing good living in me—living, that is, in my unspiritual self—for though the will to do what is good is in me, the performance is not, with the result that instead of doing good the things I want to do, I carry out the sinful things I do not want. When I act against my will, then, it is not my true self doing it, but sin which lives in me…I can see my body follows a different law that battles against the law which my reason dictates…What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body doomed to death” (Rom. 7:18–24, NJB.)

I've never read this passage, nor have most Christians I've known, read this passage and thought of sexuality. This passage could refer to any number of unchaste acts from overindulging in food or drink to anger or bitterness. Where did you get this notion from?

Paul spoke knowingly about marriage. Many scholars think that he was married and that his wife had passed. Then he devoted himself to the church. And...?

Quote:But since sex is always a danger, let each man have his own wife and each woman her own husband.

And here's a "danger" I preach about in my congregation frequently, these terrible paraphrase translations. "Sex is always a danger..."? Temptation from people one is not wed to is the danger... God "married" Adam and Eve - Gen 2:24, the next verse saying they had sex. God didn't say, "Oh no! I didn't say do THAT!"

God made sex. I love God. God commands me in the passage you cited to have sex with my wife and vice versa. I love God!
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