Chink in your armor.
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11-03-2016, 02:53 PM
RE: Chink in your armor.
(10-03-2016 10:46 PM)TurkeyBurner Wrote:  
(10-03-2016 05:52 PM)TurkeyBurner Wrote:  I can never finish anyth...

Oh, and women. And for the record, I always make sure they finish.


You mean like these ladies?

[Image: SD-Finland-women-ice-hockey-team.jpg]

Big Grin

Shakespeare's Comedy of Errors.... on Donald J. Trump:

He is deformed, crooked, old, and sere,
Ill-fac’d, worse bodied, shapeless every where;
Vicious, ungentle, foolish, blunt, unkind,
Stigmatical in making, worse in mind.
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11-03-2016, 04:07 PM
RE: Chink in your armor.
(11-03-2016 02:53 PM)dancefortwo Wrote:  
(10-03-2016 10:46 PM)TurkeyBurner Wrote:  Oh, and women. And for the record, I always make sure they finish.


You mean like these ladies?

[Image: SD-Finland-women-ice-hockey-team.jpg]

Big Grin

sure, why not

I just wanted to let you know that I love you even though you aren't naked right now. Heart
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11-03-2016, 04:47 PM
RE: Chink in your armor.
(11-03-2016 04:07 PM)TurkeyBurner Wrote:  
(11-03-2016 02:53 PM)dancefortwo Wrote:  You mean like these ladies?

[Image: SD-Finland-women-ice-hockey-team.jpg]

Big Grin

sure, why not

That was like a joke ya know. As in, like, Finland...Finnish. Hahaha. I crack myself up sometimes.

Shakespeare's Comedy of Errors.... on Donald J. Trump:

He is deformed, crooked, old, and sere,
Ill-fac’d, worse bodied, shapeless every where;
Vicious, ungentle, foolish, blunt, unkind,
Stigmatical in making, worse in mind.
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11-03-2016, 04:50 PM
RE: Chink in your armor.
I grew up with a father who always treated me like I was stupid and he called me "idiot" a lot. Even when I was really little and still learning to read he would verbally abuse me. To this day I can't stand being treated like I am dumb. I've rarely been called dumb but I worked in customer service and it happens. It always made my blood boil. I try very hard to be intelligent but I'm still human, I do stupid things all the time and I'm fine with admitting when I'm wrong and asking questions when I'm unsure but it's taken me years to get to this point. Maybe someday it won't bother me at all.

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11-03-2016, 05:00 PM
RE: Chink in your armor.
(10-03-2016 06:57 PM)Metazoa Zeke Wrote:  And the fact is no woman has ever said i looked good.

I feel ya. I'm the guy who gets told, "You're, well... You look... Um..."
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11-03-2016, 05:01 PM
RE: Chink in your armor.
Unworthy. I feel unworthy.
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11-03-2016, 05:05 PM
RE: Chink in your armor.
(11-03-2016 12:13 AM)jennybee Wrote:  
(10-03-2016 11:57 PM)jariel Wrote:  Ah - how I wish this were true for me. I happen to be a proficient pianist, composer and vocal arranger, and am indeed a better musician than most people. But my negative self-talk tells me I'm a bad, selfish, lazy, unlovable, extremely unattractive person. So down, down, down goes my self-esteem Sad

Have you ever tried to talk to a therapist about it? Maybe what you are dealing with is more than just low self-esteem. I'm sorry you are struggling with all of that though Hug

I agree you should talk to a therapist and someone who doesn't know you or else your'e gonna get "But, you're awesome!" and that doesn't help. You need to believe you are awesome and that can take time and work.

I can give you some advice I heard in a group therapy session. The therapist said just imagine if all the people in the world were not as kind as you , not as thoughtful or funny or talented and they all hated you because of it. Would they be right? No, they would be wrong becuase they are the bad ones. You are the only good person in the world so in this scenario literally no one likes you. So just know that even if that is the case as long as you like you, as long as you can stand up and say "I'm a good person and I try to do the right thing, I like me." That's all that really matters because in this world if only one person likes you, it should be you. You aren't the only one either, other people like you too but only you really know yourself and can really decide that but it's important that you realize how great you are and always remind yourself of that everyday and strive to be that person you always like, even if you make mistakes as long as you try to be good, that's all that matters.

I hope that helps, it helped me when I hated myself and I feel insecure all the time but when I imagine at least that one part of myself that's cheering me on and saying "You're great!" I start to feel better. Even if the other parts are calling me lazy and useless, that one little part still believes and it's enough.

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11-03-2016, 05:08 PM
RE: Chink in your armor.
(11-03-2016 05:00 PM)Clockwork Wrote:  
(10-03-2016 06:57 PM)Metazoa Zeke Wrote:  And the fact is no woman has ever said i looked good.

I feel ya. I'm the guy who gets told, "You're, well... You look... Um..."

You said you looked like Zach Galifianakis. He's pretty cute Thumbsup
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11-03-2016, 05:19 PM
RE: Chink in your armor.
(11-03-2016 05:05 PM)SitaSky Wrote:  
(11-03-2016 12:13 AM)jennybee Wrote:  Have you ever tried to talk to a therapist about it? Maybe what you are dealing with is more than just low self-esteem. I'm sorry you are struggling with all of that though Hug

I agree you should talk to a therapist and someone who doesn't know you or else your'e gonna get "But, you're awesome!" and that doesn't help. You need to believe you are awesome and that can take time and work.

I can give you some advice I heard in a group therapy session. The therapist said just imagine if all the people in the world were not as kind as you , not as thoughtful or funny or talented and they all hated you because of it. Would they be right? No, they would be wrong becuase they are the bad ones. You are the only good person in the world so in this scenario literally no one likes you. So just know that even if that is the case as long as you like you, as long as you can stand up and say "I'm a good person and I try to do the right thing, I like me." That's all that really matters because in this world if only one person likes you, it should be you. You aren't the only one either, other people like you too but only you really know yourself and can really decide that but it's important that you realize how great you are and always remind yourself of that everyday and strive to be that person you always like, even if you make mistakes as long as you try to be good, that's all that matters.

I hope that helps, it helped me when I hated myself and I feel insecure all the time but when I imagine at least that one part of myself that's cheering me on and saying "You're great!" I start to feel better. Even if the other parts are calling me lazy and useless, that one little part still believes and it's enough.

Good post Thumbsup I agree, just telling someone they're awesome isn't going to change the way they feel about themselves. It does take work and it's not something that will happen overnight. I think talking about it with a trained therapist can certainly help the way you are feeling about yourself.

I also think it's good to look at society for what it is--a man-made institution that likes to dictate to people how they should be, who they should love, how they should look, how much money they should make, where they should live, how they should live their lives. No wonder people don't feel good enough--society sets impossible standards. I try and separate myself from all of that--and the minute I start feeling like "Oh I should probably live in this type of house, make this kind of money, marry this type of person, settle down and have 2.5 kids, do my hair this way etc. because that's what everyone else is doing...I say fuck it. And I immediately ask myself What do I want to do? Not what society wants--what do *I* want.

I also think it's important to embrace your uniqueness. Realize being unique can be very sexy. Embrace it and be confident about it. People are attracted to unique and confident people. I know it's not always easy to feel confident about yourself, and that's why it can be a good idea to seek some outside help. You don't need to live a life feeling miserable about yourself--life is too short--and you all seem like amazing people who deserve to see that in yourselves.
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11-03-2016, 05:26 PM
RE: Chink in your armor.
(11-03-2016 05:01 PM)Hobbitgirl Wrote:  Unworthy. I feel unworthy.

I'm sorry you feel that way about yourself Hug

You're so smart and pretty...

and I'm still hoping you take me behind the party tree Tongue
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