Chink in your armor.
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11-03-2016, 05:34 PM
RE: Chink in your armor.
(11-03-2016 04:47 PM)dancefortwo Wrote:  
(11-03-2016 04:07 PM)TurkeyBurner Wrote:  sure, why not

That was like a joke ya know. As in, like, Finland...Finnish. Hahaha. I crack myself up sometimes.

That was actually a very, very good joke. I am totally smacking myself upside the head for missing it.

I just wanted to let you know that I love you even though you aren't naked right now. Heart
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11-03-2016, 05:56 PM
RE: Chink in your armor.
(10-03-2016 11:57 PM)jariel Wrote:  
Quote:The best way to build your self-esteem is to find something you are inherently good at. Everyone has at least one thing. Then work on putting your efforts into that and enhancing it. Since you are naturally good at it, have worked to enhance it, you will be better at it than most people, which will help build both your confidence and your self-esteem.

Ah - how I wish this were true for me. I happen to be a proficient pianist, composer and vocal arranger, and am indeed a better musician than most people. But my negative self-talk tells me I'm a bad, selfish, lazy, unlovable, extremely unattractive person. So down, down, down goes my self-esteem Sad

I'm a musician, too. Fairly good at what I do--sometimes have actual lines of people who want to tell me how much they enjoyed my playing. It's not enough to make me feel secure about myself as a human or a performer. I've had to accept that there's a bottomless pit there, and also that it is a rude/burdensome to acknowledge that. The good news is that feeling of inadequacy seems to be common in our profession.

Once I was getting compliments after a performance and was saying to a fellow musician who had complimented me, "I wish I had a couple of those notes back." He snapped back: "Fine, you sucked." I realized how tiresome and needy I was being and determined to be less so in the future. It's fine for me to nitpick what I did, but when people say you did a good job, do your best to accept it.

Nowadays I unload that stuff in my journal or on my husband. He says, "How did the concert go?" and I tell him about the beat where my tongue and my fingers weren't coordinated and how I played out of tune with the first flute for a couple of notes.

I'm in a pro vocal group, too (though I am mostly an instrumentalist)--if you want to PM me a link so I can check out your arrangements, please do--we are always looking for new pieces to program.
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11-03-2016, 06:00 PM
RE: Chink in your armor.
(11-03-2016 04:50 PM)SitaSky Wrote:  I grew up with a father who always treated me like I was stupid and he called me "idiot" a lot. Even when I was really little and still learning to read he would verbally abuse me. To this day I can't stand being treated like I am dumb. I've rarely been called dumb but I worked in customer service and it happens. It always made my blood boil. I try very hard to be intelligent but I'm still human, I do stupid things all the time and I'm fine with admitting when I'm wrong and asking questions when I'm unsure but it's taken me years to get to this point. Maybe someday it won't bother me at all.

I'm sorry your dad treated you like that. Hug
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11-03-2016, 06:49 PM
RE: Chink in your armor.
(11-03-2016 05:08 PM)jennybee Wrote:  You said you looked like Zach Galifianakis. He's pretty cute Thumbsup

His hometown is close to me. Smile
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11-03-2016, 07:05 PM
RE: Chink in your armor.
(10-03-2016 05:56 PM)Metazoa Zeke Wrote:  Were do I begin.

First of, nobody wants me dead more than me. I sit everyday waiting to just drop dead. And i have no redeeming factors. I am the embodiment of cancer.

I also think i look to ugly. I have a face that turns straight women into lesbians. One minute a girl can sit down and think of some boy she likes, then she sees me and begins thinking about how she can make her best friend a lesbian as well.

I forget things not science related.

I procastinate

I am a 19 year old virgin

Im nuts

I will just list those.

I felt the same way when I was your age. I had no idea how to take a compliment from a girl. No I am not exaggerating one bit. Girls never showed interest in me at all when I was in high school. I was 18 or 19 when I received my first compliment on my looks from a girl and it was about my eyes. I remember it as clear as if it were yesterday. I still thought I was ugly for a long time after that, even after I met my wife. Having come from a pretty dark place myself, I can tell you that it gets better.

My problem is that I can come off as abrasive and extremely sarcastic (way more the latter). I am aware of it and I always have to watch myself.

"If we are honest—and scientists have to be—we must admit that religion is a jumble of false assertions, with no basis in reality.
The very idea of God is a product of the human imagination."
- Paul Dirac
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11-03-2016, 07:06 PM
RE: Chink in your armor.
(11-03-2016 07:05 PM)The Organic Chemist Wrote:  
(10-03-2016 05:56 PM)Metazoa Zeke Wrote:  Were do I begin.

First of, nobody wants me dead more than me. I sit everyday waiting to just drop dead. And i have no redeeming factors. I am the embodiment of cancer.

I also think i look to ugly. I have a face that turns straight women into lesbians. One minute a girl can sit down and think of some boy she likes, then she sees me and begins thinking about how she can make her best friend a lesbian as well.

I forget things not science related.

I procastinate

I am a 19 year old virgin

Im nuts

I will just list those.

I felt the same way when I was your age. I had no idea how to take a compliment from a girl. No I am not exaggerating one bit. Girls never showed interest in me at all when I was in high school. I was 18 or 19 when I received my first compliment on my looks from a girl and it was about my eyes. I remember it as clear as if it were yesterday. I still thought I was ugly for a long time after that, even after I met my wife. Having come from a pretty dark place myself, I can tell you that it gets better.

My problem is that I can come off as abrasive and extremely sarcastic (way more the latter). I am aware of it and I always have to watch myself.

You do have pretty nice eyes Wink
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11-03-2016, 07:40 PM
RE: Chink in your armor.
[Image: DbrQ80J.jpg]

Yeah, I know. Rolleyes

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11-03-2016, 07:44 PM
RE: Chink in your armor.
(11-03-2016 02:00 PM)Unbeliever Wrote:  [quote='dancefortwo' pid='959365' dateline='1457646469']What is the most
. I make friends easily once I know that someone is open to making friends, but you basically have to hit me over the head with a cinderblock to get the message through.

Bangin
Hi, I am a potential friend. I am adorable and friendly too. Big Grin
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11-03-2016, 07:46 PM
RE: Chink in your armor.
(11-03-2016 07:40 PM)TheGulegon Wrote:  [img]http://i.imgur.com/DbrQ80J

Yeah, I know. Rolleyes

[Image: 5208758.jpg]
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11-03-2016, 08:18 PM
RE: Chink in your armor.
(11-03-2016 07:40 PM)TheGulegon Wrote:  [Image: DbrQ80J.jpg]

Yeah, I know. Rolleyes

I just had that same thought.

"If we are honest—and scientists have to be—we must admit that religion is a jumble of false assertions, with no basis in reality.
The very idea of God is a product of the human imagination."
- Paul Dirac
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