Coping with death
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13-06-2016, 05:41 AM
RE: Coping with death
(13-06-2016 05:35 AM)TheInquisition Wrote:  
(13-06-2016 05:25 AM)Dark Wanderer Wrote:  dont be so envious of theists' apparent embracing of death. ive seen a lot of tears shed at funerals that say otherwise. i think deep down most of them know that they are kidding themselves, and it really hits them when a close loved one dies.

The flip side of that fantasy world is that some of their loved ones aren't going to heaven, some of them will go to hell according to their beliefs.

That is certainly not reassuring.

A former friend of mind is a fundamentalist. One of our mutual friends from over 20 years was murdered in an apartment fire. He was Japanese and was definitely not Christian.

20 years later, I let him know I don't believe in his god anymore, so I'm headed there as well, according to his belief system.

That would be one of the first things I would ask him if a I saw him again. Both of his best friends will be in hell according to his beliefs, does he really want to accept that? Does that belief really give him comfort? How does that work?

heaven and hell make no sense. if i was christian and my daughter was an atheist how the fuck would i enjoy heaven knowing my daughter is being tortured for eternity? ridiculous.
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13-06-2016, 05:42 AM
RE: Coping with death
sorry, i pretty much said the same thing you just said. im at work and have to be brief.
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13-06-2016, 07:44 AM
RE: Coping with death
I've said this many times before.

While you are of reproductive age, your instinct of survival is at it's peak. As it should be, children need parents.

After that, your body starts slowly losing function. Along with that comes less of an instinct for survival.

If you are lucky and reach a ripe old age, you will get to where you welcome death. You will be much more familiar with it as you have seen your relatives and peers die. Your body becomes a nuisance and a burden. Now your own death is not so scary, but the death of your peers remains horrible.

So, it is totally normal to be scared of the unknown. The more familiar you become with it, the less scary it gets.

So, if you can, don't worry. It will take care of itself.

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13-06-2016, 10:12 AM
RE: Coping with death
(13-06-2016 01:11 AM)Nzy7482 Wrote:  I want to understand how any of us unbelievers can cope meaningfully with our own mortality. Can one be spiritual and be atheist? If death is just void nothingness, why did we have life at all? Should we look forward to death for any reason ? How do we not fear it, yet know it will occur?

These are jumbled thoughts and I'm not really looking for answers. More just discussion of the subject.

I can't speak for others but I deal with death by recognizing that I'll die some day weather I like it or not. That means that I need to use the time I have wisely. I don't fear death but I do fear not being able to do the things I enjoy such as biking and camping. When I get to the point where all the values that I seek are out of my reach then I'll be ready to die. As I am now 49 years old I'm really starting to see that I don't have much longer to enjoy these things so I need to get out and do them now as much as possible. I'm starting to regret all the days I sat around watching television or doing other lazy things. I wish I had every one of those hours now to mountain bike, camp, fish, study and learn more. I'm also much more conscious of what I eat and drink now because I want to stay healthy and fit as long as possible. I hope to be riding when I'm in my 70"s.

I think the answer is to be so busy living that you don't have time to worry about dying.

Do not lose your knowledge that man's proper estate is an upright posture, an intransigent mind and a step that travels unlimited roads. - Ayn Rand.

Don't sacrifice for me, live for yourself! - Me

The only alternative to Objectivism is some form of Subjectivism. - Dawson Bethrick
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13-06-2016, 10:31 AM
RE: Coping with death
(13-06-2016 05:35 AM)TheInquisition Wrote:  
(13-06-2016 05:25 AM)Dark Wanderer Wrote:  dont be so envious of theists' apparent embracing of death. ive seen a lot of tears shed at funerals that say otherwise. i think deep down most of them know that they are kidding themselves, and it really hits them when a close loved one dies.

The flip side of that fantasy world is that some of their loved ones aren't going to heaven, some of them will go to hell according to their beliefs.

That is certainly not reassuring.

A former friend of mind is a fundamentalist. One of our mutual friends from over 20 years was murdered in an apartment fire. He was Japanese and was definitely not Christian.

20 years later, I let him know I don't believe in his god anymore, so I'm headed there as well, according to his belief system.

That would be one of the first things I would ask him if a I saw him again. Both of his best friends will be in hell according to his beliefs, does he really want to accept that? Does that belief really give him comfort? How does that work?

And if a theist is in heaven knowing some of their friends and loved ones are in hell how the hell can heaven be heavenly with this knowledge. I asked someone about this once and they said god makes it so you don't know who's in hell so you remain happy in heaven. Facepalm

Well then if that's the case I wondered why they even care if people go to hell or not. Geesh! So god wipes out your memory or something? Dumb.

Anyway, back to the topic at hand. When I'm dead I won't know I'm dead because I'll be dead. I'll be nonexisting. Both my parents don't exist now, a couple of my half brothers are nonexisting. I don't even think of them as being dead because "being dead" is a state of being. My family members simply don't exist. I don't seem to have a problem with that. Drinking Beverage

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13-06-2016, 01:14 PM
RE: Coping with death
(13-06-2016 01:11 AM)Nzy7482 Wrote:  I want to understand how any of us unbelievers can cope meaningfully with our own mortality.


What is there to cope? Everybody will die and I'm not different in this regard.

Quote: If death is just void nothingness, why did we have life at all?


Cause our parents had sex. But it have nothing to do with void.

Quote: Should we look forward to death for any reason ?


While I'm not afraid of death I see no reason for looking forward to it. But if my life was endless suffering I suppose my perspective would be different.

Quote: How do we not fear it, yet know it occur.

Epicurus dealt with fear of death: Death does not concern us, because as long as we exist, death is not here. And when it come, we no longer exist.

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The first revolt is against the supreme tyranny of theology, of the phantom of God. As long as we have a master in heaven, we will be slaves on earth.

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15-06-2016, 09:47 AM
RE: Coping with death
(13-06-2016 01:11 AM)Nzy7482 Wrote:  I want to understand how any of us unbelievers can cope meaningfully with our own mortality. Can one be spiritual and be atheist? If death is just void nothingness, why did we have life at all? Should we look forward to death for any reason ? How do we not fear it, yet know it will occur?

These are jumbled thoughts and I'm not really looking for answers. More just discussion of the subject.

The last part of this video says it all.

http://www.alastairhumphreys.com/introdu...ort-video/

Do not lose your knowledge that man's proper estate is an upright posture, an intransigent mind and a step that travels unlimited roads. - Ayn Rand.

Don't sacrifice for me, live for yourself! - Me

The only alternative to Objectivism is some form of Subjectivism. - Dawson Bethrick
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15-06-2016, 10:08 AM
RE: Coping with death
(15-06-2016 09:47 AM)true scotsman Wrote:  
(13-06-2016 01:11 AM)Nzy7482 Wrote:  I want to understand how any of us unbelievers can cope meaningfully with our own mortality. Can one be spiritual and be atheist? If death is just void nothingness, why did we have life at all? Should we look forward to death for any reason ? How do we not fear it, yet know it will occur?

These are jumbled thoughts and I'm not really looking for answers. More just discussion of the subject.

The last part of this video says it all.

http://www.alastairhumphreys.com/introdu...ort-video/
Love love love stronger than like.
We ( my wife and I ) sit in this rut of sedentary Monday~Friday that spills right onto the weekend. I will show her this.
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15-06-2016, 10:47 AM (This post was last modified: 15-06-2016 11:05 AM by true scotsman.)
RE: Coping with death
(15-06-2016 10:08 AM)skyking Wrote:  
(15-06-2016 09:47 AM)true scotsman Wrote:  The last part of this video says it all.

http://www.alastairhumphreys.com/introdu...ort-video/
Love love love stronger than like.
We ( my wife and I ) sit in this rut of sedentary Monday~Friday that spills right onto the weekend. I will show her this.

I'm glad you love it. I just discovered this person and I think his ideas are life changing for me. He has a bunch of videos on his microadventure theme. I just found him while watching some videos on bike packing. One of the videos was about a guy who quit his job to ride his bike from Oregon to the southern tip of South America. When asked why, he said that "the routine is the enemy of time, it makes it fly by". That is so true. Last year on a lark My son and I and his friend hiked up to the top of a hill overlooking our valley at sunset and watched the full moon rise over the mountains to the east. Then we hiked back down by moonlight. I don't remember what I did the rest of that month, it"s all a blur but I remember that evening like it happened yesterday. I'm planning to put his ideas to practice and start a microadventure club in my area to do these kinds of things more often. I already have my next microadventure planned. We're going to ride our bikes 15 miles to a hot springs pool and then camp at the UFO watch tower which is right down the road from the pool and spend the night watching the stars and the space station going overhead. I can't wait.

Edit: There may be alcohol involved so we just might see a UFO as well.

Do not lose your knowledge that man's proper estate is an upright posture, an intransigent mind and a step that travels unlimited roads. - Ayn Rand.

Don't sacrifice for me, live for yourself! - Me

The only alternative to Objectivism is some form of Subjectivism. - Dawson Bethrick
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15-06-2016, 11:35 AM (This post was last modified: 16-06-2016 08:36 AM by Mr. Boston.)
RE: Coping with death
(13-06-2016 01:11 AM)Nzy7482 Wrote:  If death is just void nothingness, why did we have life at all?

In the timeless words of Walter Sobchak, "Fuck it Dude, let's go bowling."

But in all seriousness I feel like it's us non-believers who ACTUALLY "deal with" death - our own and other people's. Believers in any faith with an afterlife or reincarnation don't really deal with it at all, they just punt the ball. Aunt Judy's "in a better place," etc. They don't have to truly confront the notion that a person has ceased to exist.

I actually take solace in the fact that nothing I do or say will have any true immortal consequences. It's pretty damn liberating really. Last thing I need is people dealing with my bullshit after I'm dead, lol. In 2 or 3 generations there'll be nobody left who knew me alive; and very few people who give a shit about me anecdotally either. Fine. Good riddance I say.

The matter that made me up will return to the universe from whence it came. If I'm lucky some un-needed organ of mine might extend someone else's life. But even if I'm worm-food I'm at least doing something for the environment. The Ego or spark or spirit or whatever one might want to call it that defined my "being" will be done. I'm not particularly worried about it, just like I don't much worry about the billions of years the Universe managed to carry-out its affairs before I was born.

I don't WANT to die while there's still guitar riffs, and raising my kids, and at least a couple more seasons of Game of Thrones left to watch. But my passing isn't something I really fear. When it happens it happens. Honestly I think my non-belief, my assurance that there's nothing after this life, gives me a confident peace of mind that believers don't ever really have during a lifetime spent with nagging doubt about where they'll end up or what REALLY happens after they die.
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