Crulax's Guide to getting rid of Jehovah's Witnesses!
Post Reply
 
Thread Rating:
  • 0 Votes - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
12-12-2013, 04:54 AM
RE: Crulax's Guide to getting rid of Jehovah's Witnesses!
I've been known to answer the door saying

"Sure you can tell me about your religion if I can tell you all about mine. Because mine is VERY magical and you might just find yourself converted by the time I'm done with you. How much time do you have? I would really like to talk to you for HOURS; maybe well into the night. You have the time right? I've been hoping you'd knock on MY door because you have GOT to hear all that I have to share with you............did you bring other's with you? Get them IN HERE? Go get everyone you have visiting our neighborhood........ let's get started. There is SOOO so much I can share with you!! Damn I am excited. I can't wait to tell you ALL about satan and his special powers for changing your life. Like how you won't EVER have to do this door to door shit ever again. Where are your friends? Go get them. Let's get started!!!"

(talk very fast and Loud and sound very chatty while doing this)

the expressions on their faces is just priceless.

They hand you a brochure and can't leave fast enough. Works like a charm.





You're welcome Thumbsup

When I want your opinion I'll read your entrails.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes WitchSabrina's post
12-12-2013, 05:32 AM
RE: Crulax's Guide to getting rid of Jehovah's Witnesses!
(12-12-2013 04:54 AM)WitchSabrina Wrote:  I've been known to answer the door saying

"Sure you can tell me about your religion if I can tell you all about mine. Because mine is VERY magical and you might just find yourself converted by the time I'm done with you. How much time do you have? I would really like to talk to you for HOURS; maybe well into the night. You have the time right? I've been hoping you'd knock on MY door because you have GOT to hear all that I have to share with you............did you bring other's with you? Get them IN HERE? Go get everyone you have visiting our neighborhood........ let's get started. There is SOOO so much I can share with you!! Damn I am excited. I can't wait to tell you ALL about satan and his special powers for changing your life. Like how you won't EVER have to do this door to door shit ever again. Where are your friends? Go get them. Let's get started!!!"

(talk very fast and Loud and sound very chatty while doing this)

the expressions on their faces is just priceless.

They hand you a brochure and can't leave fast enough. Works like a charm.

You're welcome Thumbsup

Sounds like a bit of powdered sugar under the nose would go well with that. Thumbsup

"Good news, everyone!"
-Cody
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 2 users Like Anudist's post
12-12-2013, 05:35 AM
RE: Crulax's Guide to getting rid of Jehovah's Witnesses!
(12-12-2013 05:32 AM)Anudist Wrote:  
(12-12-2013 04:54 AM)WitchSabrina Wrote:  I've been known to answer the door saying

"Sure you can tell me about your religion if I can tell you all about mine. Because mine is VERY magical and you might just find yourself converted by the time I'm done with you. How much time do you have? I would really like to talk to you for HOURS; maybe well into the night. You have the time right? I've been hoping you'd knock on MY door because you have GOT to hear all that I have to share with you............did you bring other's with you? Get them IN HERE? Go get everyone you have visiting our neighborhood........ let's get started. There is SOOO so much I can share with you!! Damn I am excited. I can't wait to tell you ALL about satan and his special powers for changing your life. Like how you won't EVER have to do this door to door shit ever again. Where are your friends? Go get them. Let's get started!!!"

(talk very fast and Loud and sound very chatty while doing this)

the expressions on their faces is just priceless.

They hand you a brochure and can't leave fast enough. Works like a charm.

You're welcome Thumbsup

Sounds like a bit of powdered sugar under the nose would go well with that. Thumbsup

LOL I'd never thought of that. Thanks for the tip. Thumbsup LOL
Oh - that's goooood!

When I want your opinion I'll read your entrails.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
23-12-2013, 11:42 PM
RE: Crulax's Guide to getting rid of Jehovah's Witnesses!
The last time I had one come by, I took off my shirt opened the door pointed at the car parked on the edge of the road. Said "hey man my wife is out of town and her best friend is over to give me a piece, Come back in about 30 min" It's been 4 years without a single knock. Now the fun of messing with them is over. Weeping
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
23-12-2013, 11:49 PM
RE: Crulax's Guide to getting rid of Jehovah's Witnesses!
Years ago I was a member of a popular forum that no longer exists.

One of the members offered a suggestion for ensuring the Jehovah's Witnesses never bothered you again.

Invite them in, offer them a drink (laced with a sleeping agent), then take their bodies to a secluded woods area where they will awake and think twice before visiting you again.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
24-12-2013, 03:51 PM
RE: Crulax's Guide to getting rid of Jehovah's Witnesses!
Some years back, 2 of them walked up to my machine shop and I was having a problem that was about to send me over the edge. I looked up and saw them standing there out of no where, I guess I was cussing at the offending part , took me all of a second to realize who they were and screamed " FIGURE THE ODDS" .... they spun on their heels and left without a word.... my day got better after that. Big Grin
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
Post Reply
Forum Jump: