Cunning child + Dumb parents = Upbringing issues - HELP!
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27-12-2011, 04:20 PM
Cunning child + Dumb parents = Upbringing issues - HELP!
Well, my uncle and aunt have a 4 year old girl. She in my eye, is a little devil, not only she is naughty, spoiled and completely out of control, but also very cunning. At her age she have learned to use fake tears, smooth lies, pretended bad mood and simply monkey rage to get out of trouble and get whatever she wants.

The thing is that - my uncle and aunt did not even realize it.

Just few minutes ago, we find there is scratches on the wall and we questioned her. Her immidiate response was a "I dont know whats going on" face, followed by deninnal. I noticed she is lying straight away, however her parents did not at all.
So i asked her - Are you lying? tell us the truth in deep tome. She panicked and starts to fake tears saying how sorry she was. Her parents simply goes "ah" and start trying to cover the scratches, where she simply get away and starts to play on her Ipad straight away.

Ive notice her behaviour is driving my uncle and aunt apart, whenever they argue she seems to take a side and encourage the fight in some cases.

I have tried to use the naughty stool method but she simply refuses to participate, and when I spoke to my uncle and aunt, they think shes just too little for punishment (DUDE SHES 4! WHEN I WAS 4 I GET A SMACK IN THE HEAD WITH A CHOPSTICK BY MY MUM!), and her behaviour was in the acceptable limit (by which dragging off her mums feet for over 45 minutes crying crazy, shouting and punching around. or making noises on the piano on max volume making the whole house into madhouse and when been told off to switch down the volume she ran under the table and start crying) and whenever shes been naughty, and really piss her parents off, she just wiggles pretend in bad mood and then run into uncle/aunt with dripping voice of mummy mummy or pappy pappy... problem solved, my dumb uncle and aunt buys it.

ps - despite he is very smart but im feeling shes wasting her talent, im not saying who was smarter, me or her, but when I was 4, I can already recite many stories and write & read, as well as fluent speech. and she can only semi-munble, cant read and cant even hold a pen properlly.

So, Its not really upbringing tip i need here, I know how to tackle spoiled naughty devils as that I was one myself, its how can I make my uncle and aunt its time to rise a kid properlly. not only for the best of the kid but also themselves
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27-12-2011, 04:26 PM
RE: Cunning child + Dumb parents = Upbringing issues - HELP!
(27-12-2011 04:20 PM)BlahBlokesBraBroke Wrote:  So, Its not really upbringing tip i need here, I know how to tackle spoiled naughty devils as that I was one myself, its how can I make my uncle and aunt its time to rise a kid properlly. not only for the best of the kid but also themselves

Some will tell you it's none of your business, not your problem, or not your place to interfere.

I'm not one of them.

However, you risk alienating your aunt and uncle, ruining your relationship if you do say anything.
That choice is yours.

Skepticism is not a position; it is an approach to claims.
Science is not a subject, but a method.
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27-12-2011, 04:31 PM
RE: Cunning child + Dumb parents = Upbringing issues - HELP!
That type of parenting is nauseating.

Even at 2, my son understands behavior and consequences.

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27-12-2011, 05:19 PM
RE: Cunning child + Dumb parents = Upbringing issues - HELP!
What gets me is that a 4 year old has an iPad. I'm not a parent, but I can see that this type of parenting won't get her anywhere in life, your aunt and uncle need to understand that nobody will coddle her when she is older. Best way to do that? No idea.

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27-12-2011, 05:23 PM
RE: Cunning child + Dumb parents = Upbringing issues - HELP!
(27-12-2011 05:19 PM)kylestyle Wrote:  What gets me is that a 4 year old has an iPad. I'm not a parent, but I can see that this type of parenting won't get her anywhere in life, your aunt and uncle need to understand that nobody will coddle her when she is older. Best way to do that? No idea.

yeah I won't even get my 10 yr old a laptop, he breaks everything he touches or touches everything that breaks....which one could it be I don't know.

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27-12-2011, 06:10 PM
RE: Cunning child + Dumb parents = Upbringing issues - HELP!
If your cousin were to spend a day with my Gran, she would beat naughtiness out of her. (Trust me you don't want to get my Gran angry ._.)

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27-12-2011, 06:57 PM
RE: Cunning child + Dumb parents = Upbringing issues - HELP!
gotta use shock treatment!... no not with a stun gun or wall outlet..

Here's an example of what I'm talking about. Somthing I did with my own son. During the process of 'potty' training... my son caught on quickly to pee into the toilet... however he wouldn't take to poopin in the toilet. He continued to soil his underwear... So I resorted to shock treatment to get him to stop shittin' his pants and to use the toilet...

How was this done? I told my son that from now on... every time he pooped his pants he would get a cold shower. Sure enough later that day he shit his pants and I proceded to remove his soiled clothes and stood him in the shower... and turned on the cold full. The 'shock' of the cold shower really got his attention. .. The next day he used the toilet.. the following day i guess he wanted to test it again and pooped his pants... well he got a 2nd cold shower. After that he never shit his pants again... problem solved.

As for the 4 year old girl... sounds like it's time for spankings. I'm not talkin bare hand either... pattle / belt spankings.. no more iPod ... no privilages at all untill that 4 year old learns some respect.

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28-12-2011, 12:35 AM
RE: Cunning child + Dumb parents = Upbringing issues - HELP!
Oh dear. Unfortunately with this scenario there isn't a lot YOU can do. If her parents aren't willing to really see what's going on then it's going to get a lot worse before it gets better. If nothing is done now the situation will spiral out of control and then not only will it probably divide the parents (probably permanently) the child will grow up not knowing any boundaries and expecting everything to go her own way. This inevitably will lead to total rebellion and the child being socially unaccepted. If it's gets to that stage it can only have dire consequences.
There are so many parents out there that believe young children cannot understand discipline and therefore it is left until too late. This couldn't be further from the truth.
The only way this can get better is for the parents to admit there is a problem and if they can't intervene themselves they will require professional help. But that's the hard part as they obviously think they're not doing anything wrong (which screams 'uneducated').
The only 'easy' way out would be to maybe buy them a 'parenting' book which they may or may not like as it points out they are not doing a very good job.
I'm sorry as I don't see this ending too well. Very sad

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28-12-2011, 12:59 AM
RE: Cunning child + Dumb parents = Upbringing issues - HELP!
(28-12-2011 12:35 AM)aurora2020 Wrote:  The only way this can get better is for the parents to admit there is a problem and if they can't intervene themselves they will require professional help.

There was a series of programs a while back where problem kids + families would consult a psychologist and they would follow the kid's progress for the next few weeks. I watched a few - not a single one where the kids didn't end up becoming much better behaved, and in a short space of time too. They did some with teenagers as well - really amazing.

I reckon what Aurora said - convince them that there is a problem - could be as easy as pointing out that other people's kids are not crazy screaming bundles of terror - and suggest to meet with a child psychologist to discuss a solution.
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28-12-2011, 04:25 AM (This post was last modified: 28-12-2011 04:31 AM by BlahBlokesBraBroke.)
RE: Cunning child + Dumb parents = Upbringing issues - HELP!
(27-12-2011 06:10 PM)tazmin98 Wrote:  If your cousin were to spend a day with my Gran, she would beat naughtiness out of her. (Trust me you don't want to get my Gran angry ._.)

dont work, my grans were sexist and they honestly dont give a dam about her (but not me cos im the head male of the generation, dammit!) . funny enough, when shes around stranger or less-known people, she behave normal, its only with parents and people she know very well, she dish out these behaviour
(27-12-2011 06:57 PM)ddrew Wrote:  gotta use shock treatment!... no not with a stun gun or wall outlet..

Here's an example of what I'm talking about. Somthing I did with my own son. During the process of 'potty' training... my son caught on quickly to pee into the toilet... however he wouldn't take to poopin in the toilet. He continued to soil his underwear... So I resorted to shock treatment to get him to stop shittin' his pants and to use the toilet...

How was this done? I told my son that from now on... every time he pooped his pants he would get a cold shower. Sure enough later that day he shit his pants and I proceded to remove his soiled clothes and stood him in the shower... and turned on the cold full. The 'shock' of the cold shower really got his attention. .. The next day he used the toilet.. the following day i guess he wanted to test it again and pooped his pants... well he got a 2nd cold shower. After that he never shit his pants again... problem solved.

As for the 4 year old girl... sounds like it's time for spankings. I'm not talkin bare hand either... pattle / belt spankings.. no more iPod ... no privilages at all untill that 4 year old learns some respect.


Yes, if im her parent i would defintly try this. The problem is that her parents did not realize how serious her condition was. Last night she vandaled the wall with crayon, and I told my uncle and aunt its time for punlishment, and they agrred. So i used the old "naughty chair" supernanny method, it did work, but she keep crying no no no no no for her parents attention, while my uncle finally got his heart soft, while she saw this opputunity she stood off and ran into her dads arm. While I told my uncle he is spoiler her, my uncle said "come on shes only 4, shes too young"

Too young my ass n1gger!!

(27-12-2011 06:57 PM)ddrew Wrote:  gotta use shock treatment!... no not with a stun gun or wall outlet..

Here's an example of what I'm talking about. Somthing I did with my own son. During the process of 'potty' training... my son caught on quickly to pee into the toilet... however he wouldn't take to poopin in the toilet. He continued to soil his underwear... So I resorted to shock treatment to get him to stop shittin' his pants and to use the toilet...

How was this done? I told my son that from now on... every time he pooped his pants he would get a cold shower. Sure enough later that day he shit his pants and I proceded to remove his soiled clothes and stood him in the shower... and turned on the cold full. The 'shock' of the cold shower really got his attention. .. The next day he used the toilet.. the following day i guess he wanted to test it again and pooped his pants... well he got a 2nd cold shower. After that he never shit his pants again... problem solved.

As for the 4 year old girl... sounds like it's time for spankings. I'm not talkin bare hand either... pattle / belt spankings.. no more iPod ... no privilages at all untill that 4 year old learns some respect.


Yes, if im her parent i would defintly try this. The problem is that her parents did not realize how serious her condition was. Last night she vandaled the wall with crayon, and I told my uncle and aunt its time for punlishment, and they agrred. So i used the old "naughty chair" supernanny method, it did work, but she keep crying no no no no no for her parents attention, while my uncle finally got his heart soft, while she saw this opputunity she stood off and ran into her dads arm. While I told my uncle he is spoiler her, my uncle said "come on shes only 4, shes too young"

Too young my ass n1gger!!
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