Dealing with anger
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05-02-2011, 02:11 PM
Dealing with anger
What do you all do when you are very angry at someone to the point you just want to hit them or angry over something that didn't go the way you wanted it to? Doesn't have to do with religion but life in general. Like a small group of guys keep harassing me around campus. Also people keep on making fun of how young I look for my age. Another thing is that sometimes I get frustrated when I do bad on a college assighnment like right now I cannot figure something out.
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05-02-2011, 02:29 PM
RE: Dealing with anger
Interesting timing for this thread. (It's been a heck of a day so far) I just found out that my step-daughter is having troubles with friends at school. She's only ten, and very quiet. Her "best friend" is having a birthday party and didn't invite her. She is devestated. I am really angry right now, and it's always how I get when someone I love gets hurt. I'm ashamed to say, right now I feel like punching a ten year old girl right in the nose!

Sorry I don't have any advice, but I'm definitely looking for some too.

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05-02-2011, 02:33 PM
RE: Dealing with anger
My cures come from others. Good friends or my good woman. Sometimes with a bottle of beer or two thrown in.
Might I ask Omega, what kind of harassment is going on?

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05-02-2011, 02:52 PM
RE: Dealing with anger
BTW, my first reaction was, "just tell me who's harassing you and I'll kick their ass!" Um, ya, not the best reaction huh?

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05-02-2011, 02:54 PM
RE: Dealing with anger
''I'm lucky'' to be one of those guys who don't get angry easily. I just curse alot when shit happens and then it's over. And when I pissed I think ''this is a temporary feeling, wait and it will go away''.

When it's -20 degrees outside and I'm going home from a grocery store and my bike's chains suddenly break into pieces and the plastic bag breaks and my groceries break and I'm still kilometers from home and starving, I might kick the broken milk can and throw the bike to a ditch, but then I get that ''I'll just have to walk the bike home and grab as much groceries as I can, and when I'll be resting home in warmness and eating, I will feel alot more comfortable''.

It will take alot of effort to anger me, especially if I've been listening to happy music.

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05-02-2011, 03:03 PM
RE: Dealing with anger
(05-02-2011 02:29 PM)Stark Raving Wrote:  Interesting timing for this thread. (It's been a heck of a day so far) I just found out that my step-daughter is having troubles with friends at school. She's only ten, and very quiet. Her "best friend" is having a birthday party and didn't invite her. She is devestated. I am really angry right now, and it's always how I get when someone I love gets hurt. I'm ashamed to say, right now I feel like punching a ten year old girl right in the nose!

Sorry I don't have any advice, but I'm definitely looking for some too.

It is cool. Sorry for your step daughter's problem I hope that things work out.
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05-02-2011, 03:04 PM
RE: Dealing with anger
I used to have anger issues especially with bullying back in middle school. I used to keep my anger and hold it like a seed in my mind. It will grow by feeding the more anger you put in and/or just being there. Feeding it make's it grow faster. The anger will grow until an event happens and then it will explode like an atomic bomb.

That bomb destroys a bit of me, my family, and my surroundings. I bring my suffering onto others.

This my or may not work for you.

What helped me got rid of my anger issues was a suggestion from my cousin (during my conflict times of me officially disbelieving in Christianity and god.) to read some books from some Buddhist teachers.

They all said that anger is a normal process which you must accept, but not let you control. If you can just let it go and if your are into meditation. Use meditation to help clear your mind of the anger and use it to understand the anger and move it away. Live with compassion for others and including your enemies. Anger will lead to more anger. That is true in my experience.

If someone angers me I will let it go. I would forgive the person as long the action was forgivable. If there are others picking you. The best bet is too accept that they are picking you, but never fight back with anger. The others will use your anger as fuel to fight you again. Find a way to deal with them, find a way to ignore and avoid, or even get some help.

You are responsible with your own anger. Just don't let it take it over.

"Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned. " - The Buddha

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“Believe nothing, no matter where you read it, or who said it, no matter if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense.” ~ Gautama Buddha
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05-02-2011, 03:06 PM
RE: Dealing with anger
(05-02-2011 02:33 PM)cfhmagnet Wrote:  My cures come from others. Good friends or my good woman. Sometimes with a bottle of beer or two thrown in.
Might I ask Omega, what kind of harassment is going on?

Well they tell me that I am a loser for going to strip clubs all the time. I do go to strip clubs but it isn't their business that I enjoy going to them and why I go so often. Also they tease me for looking younger than most students on campus and that I will never get a girlfriend. They started when they found out I was an atheist go figure.
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05-02-2011, 03:06 PM
RE: Dealing with anger
I once almost got bullied. I'm not recommending it for everyone, I think it's more of a size thing, but anyway.

There was 5 guys who followed me around break times at high school shouting out various incarnations of "you are a fat shit", throwing food at me and such. After about a week of ignoring it I got one of my best friends and we both beat the living shit out of all 5 guys in the park outside school grounds.

I don't think they knew the difference between blobby fat and that kind of fat that's balanced with an equal amount of muscle xD

Or more recent people take the piss out of me because I dress outside of my age range. But usually I just take the piss back and twice as hard because I'm twice the size and twice the intelligence of them.

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05-02-2011, 03:07 PM
RE: Dealing with anger
(05-02-2011 02:54 PM)Kikko Wrote:  ''I'm lucky'' to be one of those guys who don't get angry easily. I just curse alot when shit happens and then it's over. And when I pissed I think ''this is a temporary feeling, wait and it will go away''.

When it's -20 degrees outside and I'm going home from a grocery store and my bike's chains suddenly break into pieces and the plastic bag breaks and my groceries break and I'm still kilometers from home and starving, I might kick the broken milk can and throw the bike to a ditch, but then I get that ''I'll just have to walk the bike home and grab as much groceries as I can, and when I'll be resting home in warmness and eating, I will feel alot more comfortable''.

It will take alot of effort to anger me, especially if I've been listening to happy music.

I understand what you mean. I do need to do a better job of getting over things.
(05-02-2011 03:04 PM)The Doctor Wrote:  I used to have anger issues especially with bullying back in middle school. I used to keep my anger and hold it like a seed in my mind. It will grow by feeding the more anger you put in and/or just being there. Feeding it make's it grow faster. The anger will grow until an event happens and then it will explode like an atomic bomb.

That bomb destroys a bit of me, my family, and my surroundings. I bring my suffering onto others.

This my or may not work for you.

What helped me got rid of my anger issues was a suggestion from my cousin (during my conflict times of me officially disbelieving in Christianity and god.) to read some books from some Buddhist teachers.

They all said that anger is a normal process which you must accept, but not let you control. If you can just let it go and if your are into meditation. Use meditation to help clear your mind of the anger and use it to understand the anger and move it away. Live with compassion for others and including your enemies. Anger will lead to more anger. That is true in my experience.

If someone angers me I will let it go. I would forgive the person as long the action was forgivable. If there are others picking you. The best bet is too accept that they are picking you, but never fight back with anger. The others will use your anger as fuel to fight you again. Find a way to deal with them, find a way to ignore and avoid, or even get some help.

You are responsible with your own anger. Just don't let it take it over.

"Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned. " - The Buddha

Good advice. I will try to do a better job of not letting my anger control me, and do a better job of not letting others fuel it. I will remember what you said thanks.
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