Dealing with patience
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16-10-2016, 03:44 AM
Dealing with patience
I'm not sure if philosophy is the right forum for this topic, but if it isn't, forgive me and feel free to move it when you want.

I was giving my little brother advice on something and I said it required a great deal of patience, and my little brother is known to be impatient most of the time and hates waiting.

I thought to myself, there's really no way to acquire patience when waiting, the only thing you can do is just fill the time by occupying yourself doing something and if there's little access to anything, there's only access to one thing and that is your brain. I told him if you are in a place where you have nothing tangible he can keep himself occupied with; no access to books, phones, laptops... etc. he only has his brain at his disposal. One of the most important quality one needs to have in order to tackle with patience is 'imagination'. If you're not an imaginative person, you will barely handle waiting at all. I also believe that in order to develop your imagination, you need to have passion over something, especially a skill that is acquired.

If you have skills over something and you are passionate about it, your imagination over it will be endless. You will plan out your dreams, your future. You will boost your enthusiasm and your ego, and you will think of new ways to develop your skills.

An example would be myself. I have been figure skating for many years now, and I am very passionate about my skating skills. Every time I am required to wait, it gives me the opportunity for my imagination to soar. I think of how I can gain more fitness into increasing my skills, I think of many ways I can choreograph my skating, I think of how I can teach people how to skate, I delve into it so deeply that I get lost in my imagination, and in turn I lose track of time.

This is just my two cents on how to deal with patience, and I was wondering what your take is on this topic, I would love to hear many different kinds of opinions. Smile
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16-10-2016, 06:01 AM
RE: Dealing with patience
I had dial-up internet until about 8 years ago, so my patience is endless.
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16-10-2016, 06:17 AM
RE: Dealing with patience
(16-10-2016 03:44 AM)OnlyLogicPlease Wrote:  This is just my two cents on how to deal with patience, and I was wondering what your take is on this topic, I would love to hear many different kinds of opinions. Smile

It sounds to me like you've got a few different things going on. The first is dealing with impatience and you are advocating a distraction approach. That's fine, but doesn't really address the problem. Sometimes it requires compartmentalizing things that you can't affect yourself and sometimes it requires planning how to move closer to the goal. The key in both of those approaches, apart from learning to figure out which to choose, is in learning to control the emotional factors to dampen the "I have to have it now" feeling.

The second thing you have happening is the value of imagination as a tool for self-distraction and whether or not a strong passion is needed for that. I agree that imagination can be an effective way to pass time and that a passion can give you a focus for that imagination and make it easier to leverage. I don't think it's particularly necessary, at least not for me. I've always had a strong imagination and get easily lost in thought over many different topics so the need for a passion may vary between individuals. It may also be that practice affects it as I've always loved mythology and sci-fi and reading and they all give you practice in imagining.

Atheism: it's not just for communists any more!
America July 4 1776 - November 8 2016 RIP
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16-10-2016, 09:44 AM
RE: Dealing with patience
I like to try and view things as a journey. When I get impatient, I remind myself that if this was easy, everybody would be able to do it. The fact that it's going to take some time to hone my skills and I am going to have to work hard to achieve my goals is rewarding to me.
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16-10-2016, 10:14 AM
RE: Dealing with patience
Maybe old age helps!

I was middling patient with my own "having to waits", unless another was dithering needlessly, but often impatient with others who could not grasp things first time round.

The thing that "cured" me was "teaching": first as a volunteer assistant in adult literacy then as a "computer buddy" (euck) in the Gloucester Library. Losing one's rag these jobs could destroy a fragile confidence that you may have spent weeks building in the other- a definite no-no! Patient reiterations of the same thing until that glorious glow of realisation - teacher's prime reward - came over the learner's face. Or, in one case, a deadpan reaction, a few moments of reflection and then a very astute question, quietly put, that took her immediately onto the next stage and that told me there was a very good brain in that lady's head.

I went home feeling the after-glow of ahievement myself that evening!

Tomorrow is precious, don't ruin it by fouling up today.
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16-10-2016, 08:47 PM
RE: Dealing with patience
I can wait hours just sitting around and staring into space. I have a really skilled imagination so I just imagine I'm not bored and it works.
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17-10-2016, 01:26 AM
RE: Dealing with patience
I don't think that imagination has much to do with patience. It could help pass time but that's about it. Patience is learned I would say - I stood in many queues, at first I was impatient but after some time I become accustomed to slow rhythm of given queue. Having said that I almost always carry book with me when I'm expecting longer period of waiting - no sense in wasting time that could be spent on widening one knowledge.

The first revolt is against the supreme tyranny of theology, of the phantom of God. As long as we have a master in heaven, we will be slaves on earth.

Mikhail Bakunin.
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17-10-2016, 05:44 AM
RE: Dealing with patience
Try being stuck in a wheelchair for 18 months.........

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I was HAPPY to have dial-up internet. I'd probably gone nuts without it.

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The difference between prayer and masturbation - is when a guy is through masturbating - he has something to show for his efforts.
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17-10-2016, 06:15 AM
RE: Dealing with patience
Years and years ago, back in the earliest days of personal computing in Britland, I bought a Sinclair ZX81 then the next model, both using a cassette recorder for loading programs - every time you wanted to use them!

Took ten minutes to load "The Hobbit", ah, well, enough time to go away and make a cuppa and a sarnie..

Then Sinclair invented the Microdrive, a tiny continuous loop tape cassette.. Faster, now only took about minute to load a "large" programme. Not long emough to do much but long enough to get me tapping the table with impatience!

Tomorrow is precious, don't ruin it by fouling up today.
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19-10-2016, 10:40 PM
RE: Dealing with patience
I used to be incredibly impatient but developed patience almost without trying, just with the passage of years. Recently, though, I picked up a willpower tip from someone's blog (don't remember which blog; sorry). It's a simple technique that your brother might be able to use to work on patience.

When you want something, for instance a chocolate bar, rather than saying "no" and then fighting the impulse to grab it anyway, you say "wait" or "later." The length of the interval is irrelevant; it could be less than a minute. The key is that you give yourself permission to do something later rather than automatically going with a compulsion to do it immediately.
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