Dear you immoral heathens, sinners, hellbound god-haters
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08-03-2012, 11:47 AM
RE: Dear you amoral heathens, sinners, hellbound god-haters
(08-03-2012 11:45 AM)kineo Wrote:  Many churches have pre-church Sunday School classes for different age sets (depending on the size of the church). But I'm confused too, it's a forum? Are they trying to ambush you to save you from your heathenous thinking?

Yeah, it's a forum. Kind of like this one.

And, I think it's innocent enough... as everyone in the SS was invited... but, I'm still wary of an ambush.

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08-03-2012, 12:18 PM
RE: Dear you amoral heathens, sinners, hellbound god-haters
(08-03-2012 11:47 AM)kingschosen Wrote:  
(08-03-2012 11:45 AM)kineo Wrote:  Many churches have pre-church Sunday School classes for different age sets (depending on the size of the church). But I'm confused too, it's a forum? Are they trying to ambush you to save you from your heathenous thinking?

Yeah, it's a forum. Kind of like this one.

And, I think it's innocent enough... as everyone in the SS was invited... but, I'm still wary of an ambush.

They're gonna surround you in a circle and put their hands on you, then the preacher man is gonna shout out to the LORD to save your scurvy soul! Arrrr Big Grin
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08-03-2012, 02:20 PM
RE: Dear you amoral heathens, sinners, hellbound god-haters
(08-03-2012 12:18 PM)morondog Wrote:  
(08-03-2012 11:47 AM)kingschosen Wrote:  
(08-03-2012 11:45 AM)kineo Wrote:  Many churches have pre-church Sunday School classes for different age sets (depending on the size of the church). But I'm confused too, it's a forum? Are they trying to ambush you to save you from your heathenous thinking?

Yeah, it's a forum. Kind of like this one.

And, I think it's innocent enough... as everyone in the SS was invited... but, I'm still wary of an ambush.

They're gonna surround you in a circle and put their hands on you, then the preacher man is gonna shout out to the LORD to save your scurvy soul! Arrrr Big Grin

I looked for a faith-healing headsmack-healed falling-down-saved talking-in-tongues animated gif but couldn't find one.

As it was in the beginning is now and ever shall be, world without end. Amen.
And I will show you something different from either
Your shadow at morning striding behind you
Or your shadow at evening rising to meet you;
I will show you fear in a handful of dust.
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08-03-2012, 03:04 PM
RE: Dear you amoral heathens, sinners, hellbound god-haters
(08-03-2012 02:20 PM)GirlyMan Wrote:  
(08-03-2012 12:18 PM)morondog Wrote:  They're gonna surround you in a circle and put their hands on you, then the preacher man is gonna shout out to the LORD to save your scurvy soul! Arrrr Big Grin

I looked for a faith-healing headsmack-healed falling-down-saved talking-in-tongues animated gif but couldn't find one.

How's this?

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08-03-2012, 03:42 PM
RE: Dear you amoral heathens, sinners, hellbound god-haters
(08-03-2012 03:04 PM)kineo Wrote:  
(08-03-2012 02:20 PM)GirlyMan Wrote:  
(08-03-2012 12:18 PM)morondog Wrote:  They're gonna surround you in a circle and put their hands on you, then the preacher man is gonna shout out to the LORD to save your scurvy soul! Arrrr Big Grin

I looked for a faith-healing headsmack-healed falling-down-saved talking-in-tongues animated gif but couldn't find one.

How's this?

[Image: 4090531d-31d5-46e9-8d50-b137cf3398ef.gif]

Damn, you fuckers are good at finding these. Big Grin

As it was in the beginning is now and ever shall be, world without end. Amen.
And I will show you something different from either
Your shadow at morning striding behind you
Or your shadow at evening rising to meet you;
I will show you fear in a handful of dust.
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08-03-2012, 03:48 PM
RE: Dear you amoral heathens, sinners, hellbound god-haters
That gif is now my sig.

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08-03-2012, 04:24 PM
RE: Dear you amoral heathens, sinners, hellbound god-haters
(08-03-2012 03:48 PM)kingschosen Wrote:  That gif is now my sig.

you speeded it up? ROFL. He looks like a coat wielding martial artist Big Grin
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12-04-2012, 10:10 AM
RE: Dear you amoral heathens, sinners, hellbound god-haters
In another strange twist...

So basically, I was denied the right to teach in the church because of my Calvinist beliefs. The reasoning was that they didn't want someone in quasi-authority teaching that held to a doctrine that the Southern Baptists disagree with.

I get it. I don't agree with it, but I get it.

My rebuttal was, "What about teaching things that have zero to do with freewill and predestination?"

I was still declined based on principle.

Now, the messed up part...

The church provided all of the Sunday School classes with a book about Revelation and end times written by Dr. David Jeremiah. Dr. David Jeremiah is a Calvinist.

So, it's okay to learn about the end times from a Calvinist; however, I can't teach about different things that have nothing to do with Calvinism because I'm a Calvinist. Wait... what?

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12-04-2012, 10:34 AM
RE: Dear you amoral heathens, sinners, hellbound god-haters
(12-04-2012 10:10 AM)kingschosen Wrote:  In another strange twist...

So basically, I was denied the right to teach in the church because of my Calvinist beliefs. The reasoning was that they didn't want someone in quasi-authority teaching that held to a doctrine that the Southern Baptists disagree with.

I get it. I don't agree with it, but I get it.

My rebuttal was, "What about teaching things that have zero to do with freewill and predestination?"

I was still declined based on principle.

Now, the messed up part...

The church provided all of the Sunday School classes with a book about Revelation and end times written by Dr. David Jeremiah. Dr. David Jeremiah is a Calvinist.

So, it's okay to learn about the end times from a Calvinist; however, I can't teach about different things that have nothing to do with Calvinism because I'm a Calvinist. Wait... what?
Shame, all those poor predestined kiddies, growing up without the light that is Calvinism shining into their darkened little souls Big Grin You realise all that about being denied the right to speak at Sunday School was predestined right? God's just messing with you KC Wink
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12-04-2012, 10:38 AM
RE: Dear you amoral heathens, sinners, hellbound god-haters
(12-04-2012 10:34 AM)morondog Wrote:  
(12-04-2012 10:10 AM)kingschosen Wrote:  In another strange twist...

So basically, I was denied the right to teach in the church because of my Calvinist beliefs. The reasoning was that they didn't want someone in quasi-authority teaching that held to a doctrine that the Southern Baptists disagree with.

I get it. I don't agree with it, but I get it.

My rebuttal was, "What about teaching things that have zero to do with freewill and predestination?"

I was still declined based on principle.

Now, the messed up part...

The church provided all of the Sunday School classes with a book about Revelation and end times written by Dr. David Jeremiah. Dr. David Jeremiah is a Calvinist.

So, it's okay to learn about the end times from a Calvinist; however, I can't teach about different things that have nothing to do with Calvinism because I'm a Calvinist. Wait... what?
Shame, all those poor predestined kiddies, growing up without the light that is Calvinism shining into their darkened little souls Big Grin You realise all that about being denied the right to speak at Sunday School was predestined right? God's just messing with you KC Wink
Or he's revealing something to me. Or teaching me.

That or he's developing my much needed patience with Christians.

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