Decided to come out: Access denied
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04-10-2013, 05:56 AM (This post was last modified: 04-10-2013 06:00 AM by absols.)
RE: Decided to come out: Access denied
there must b smthg else, i never heard of such story..women would never divorce or leave the father of her child or a man bc he doesnt want to go to church anymore

on the contrary women expect that from men, bc men are more independant and dont need to keep praying and praising the lord for anything like women do, so in fact women like to see it in men as a sign of his strength and virility

i dont mean anything, it must b true since u say so, it is just weird reaction so maybe is there smthg else you are not saying too

bc also for christians the most valuable life is to convert and love the atheist till he would b convinced of jesus love
especially for women this is their ways in being religious the love section of the lord is their strength to brag about knowing in life or their obligations to assume especially inside their house and for family values which is the principal value to give to in christians life
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04-10-2013, 07:53 AM
RE: Decided to come out: Access denied
That's good advice. I wasn't trying to convert her though, I just felt like it was something she should know. Later down the line things could have been much uglier if I was just keeping this from her. But you're right, laying low with all that is probably for the best.
Thanks for that
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04-10-2013, 09:47 AM
RE: Decided to come out: Access denied
Give it time. Don't bring it up again unless she does.

She was shocked. She will settle down.

It is important though that any further discussion of this come from HER, not you.

Just enjoy your daughter and be nice in general and maybe things will resolve themselves in time.

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Science is the process we've designed to be responsible for generating our best guess as to what the fuck is going on. Girly Man
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04-10-2013, 03:18 PM
RE: Decided to come out: Access denied
Sorry dude. I feel sorry for your daughter too.

"No gods, no masters."
-Margaret Sanger

Peace is not the absence of war but the presence of justice.

If you want to be a language policeman, I suggest you find yourself in a George Orwell novel.
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04-10-2013, 04:16 PM
RE: Decided to come out: Access denied
My wife (She Is, for forum purposes) recommends you talk to the priest/pastor of your wife's church. The church leader is likely to see you as a stray sheep. His responsibility will probably be to maintain the family. If you don't argue with him too much, he'll probably recommend to your wife that she give you some time, a second chance, etc.

If he rejects you too, well, no additional loss.

This may seem a bit cynical, using a church's priorities to support your own position. Keep in mind that the social strength fostered by the church is not the same thing as the BS theology they claim is true. Let them do the good that they can, and possibly keep your marriage together.

So, invite her to go to the church and talk to him. Maybe even meet him ahead of time and explain the situation. It might work out in your favor.

I AM he who is called... cat furniture.
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05-10-2013, 10:07 AM
RE: Decided to come out: Access denied
In my experience the first reaction is not the final answer. This is particularly true with the XX gender, IMHO. Whatever you do, don't try to talk about these issues anymore. Just be totally cool and positive and happy every time you see her - smile, flirt and be yourself. Don't try to resolve any more issues verbally. Give her time to come around by remembering what an awesome positive person you are. That's your best shot.

Work hard as school and get good grades. You are a year away from your first job, which is really important. Try to focus on that and enjoying your time with your little girl when you get time to see her.

Stay positive, and good luck!

Don't sell yourself short Judge, you're an incredible slouch.

Martin Luther was the "father" of two movements - The Reformation and Nazism.
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05-10-2013, 12:38 PM
RE: Decided to come out: Access denied
Wow! I don't see a happy ending to this. It's an unfortunate example of the power so many have over those of us who are atheists. Our jobs can be taken from us. We can become pariahs of our community in an instant. And in your, very sad case, we can lose the ones we love! I can't even say "I pray for you!" But you have my deepest sympathy.
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05-10-2013, 12:42 PM
RE: Decided to come out: Access denied
But what a beautiful daughter! Don't let anyone keep you from her!
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05-10-2013, 12:50 PM
RE: Decided to come out: Access denied
Tell her that although you don't believe in God, that no doubt, God still believes in you and that she should follow God's example and not give up on you either.
Isn't God's message to love, forgive and be compassionate?
At what point did Jesus preach to forsake those that don't believe as you do?
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06-10-2013, 06:49 PM
RE: Decided to come out: Access denied
I like the advice of backin off. Like you said, you're not trying to convert. You just wanted this out there in the open. And for that much, you had enough strength.

Now is time to love on your baby. Support mom as much as possible. Listen to her because she is likely exhausted beyond the point she has ever been before. If you're the kind of dad that tries to be there as much as possible for her emotionally and are attentive and ready to tend to your baby to give her a break when you can be home from school that will speak for you. We know that just because one doesnt believe in a deity it says nothing about their compassion and care for others.

Congrats!! She is beautiful.

Blink
If everyone is thinking alike, then somebody isn't thinking. -George S. Patton
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