Poll: Jesus died on the cross or survived the crucifixion?
Jesus never existed
Jesus died on the cross
Jesus survived the crucifixion
the body was stolen
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Did Jesus survived the crucifixion?
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01-04-2016, 01:38 PM
RE: Did Jesus survived the crucifixion?
There was no one called Jesus.

The ancient text talk of a Yeshua.
They talk of a magical baby boy born of a virgin that when an adult cured ills and dead and walked on water and turned water into alcoholic beverages . Yeshua's tale is that of impossible magic, a fairy tale made for imaginative kids.
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01-04-2016, 03:16 PM
RE: Did Jesus survived the crucifixion?
(01-04-2016 01:38 PM)Stevil Wrote:  There was no one called Jesus.

The ancient text talk of a Yeshua.
They talk of a magical baby boy born of a virgin that when an adult cured ills and dead and walked on water and turned water into alcoholic beverages . Yeshua's tale is that of impossible magic, a fairy tale made for imaginative kids.

Jesus was a common name back in the day. I kinda think there was some Joe Schmo rabbi named Jesus whose legend it's all based on, similar to King Arthur or Robin Hood. I can't prove it or anything but knowing how humans love to tell stories about local heroes and interesting town folk, and also knowing how much people love to embellished a story with every retelling, pretty soon Jesus, the local Joe Schmoo Rabbi, became a magical and godly Jesus that storytellers shoehorned into Bible prophecy. And voila! Jesus became Magic Jesus, Son of God. Yeehaw!

It's my "Joe Schmoo theory of Jesus". Tongue

And if he was crucified he's deader than a doornail.

Shakespeare's Comedy of Errors.... on Donald J. Trump:

He is deformed, crooked, old, and sere,
Ill-fac’d, worse bodied, shapeless every where;
Vicious, ungentle, foolish, blunt, unkind,
Stigmatical in making, worse in mind.
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01-04-2016, 03:32 PM
RE: Did Jesus survived the crucifixion?
I suspect that there was a historical Jesus that the myths have been based on. All the best lies have a kernel of truth.

I suspect that the Romans crucified the fool. That bit is more likely than not given their attitude toward rabble-rousers in Judaea.

I suspect that the rest of the tale is a fable designed to fit the Messiah story. Hard to have him come back if he's rotting on the cross and being gnawed upon by vultures and jackals so we'll invent a quick death, dignified burial and miraculous ressurection. Voila! The tomb is empty because he never went in.

---
Flesh and blood of a dead star, slain in the apocalypse of supernova, resurrected by four billion years of continuous autocatalytic reaction and crowned with the emergent property of sentience in the dream that the universe might one day understand itself.
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01-04-2016, 04:03 PM
RE: Did Jesus survived the crucifixion?
Surviving the crucifixion was very possible. Josephus documented a few cases of people that survived the crucifixion with medical assistance. If the victim was taken down from the cross on time , they definitive can survived. So crucifixion is not necessary = death. But of course taking the victim down from the cross was VERY Rare.

Religion is bullshit. The winner of the last person to post wins thread.Yes
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01-04-2016, 05:49 PM
RE: Did Jesus survived the crucifixion?
(01-04-2016 03:16 PM)dancefortwo Wrote:  Jesus was a common name back in the day. I kinda think there was some Joe Schmo rabbi named Jesus whose legend it's all based on, similar to King Arthur or Robin Hood. I can't prove it or anything but knowing how humans love to tell stories about local heroes and interesting town folk, and also knowing how much people love to embellished a story with every retelling, pretty soon Jesus, the local Joe Schmoo Rabbi, became a magical and godly Jesus that storytellers shoehorned into Bible prophecy. And voila! Jesus became Magic Jesus, Son of God. Yeehaw!

It's my "Joe Schmoo theory of Jesus". Tongue

This so reminds me of this.




#sigh
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01-04-2016, 06:54 PM
RE: Did Jesus survived the crucifixion?
(01-04-2016 05:49 PM)GirlyMan Wrote:  
(01-04-2016 03:16 PM)dancefortwo Wrote:  Jesus was a common name back in the day. I kinda think there was some Joe Schmo rabbi named Jesus whose legend it's all based on, similar to King Arthur or Robin Hood. I can't prove it or anything but knowing how humans love to tell stories about local heroes and interesting town folk, and also knowing how much people love to embellished a story with every retelling, pretty soon Jesus, the local Joe Schmoo Rabbi, became a magical and godly Jesus that storytellers shoehorned into Bible prophecy. And voila! Jesus became Magic Jesus, Son of God. Yeehaw!

It's my "Joe Schmoo theory of Jesus". Tongue

This so reminds me of this.




Yes! One of my favorite movies and unfortunately kind of forgotten. Chauncy Gardner is a blank slate and people see in him what they want to see. Interesting ending too.

Shakespeare's Comedy of Errors.... on Donald J. Trump:

He is deformed, crooked, old, and sere,
Ill-fac’d, worse bodied, shapeless every where;
Vicious, ungentle, foolish, blunt, unkind,
Stigmatical in making, worse in mind.
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02-04-2016, 02:19 AM
RE: Did Jesus survived the crucifixion?
It's obvious that jesus and his identical twin pulled off the crucifiction scam together, they must have spent hours arguing about which one of them got to wait in the tomb, jesus (1) lost 3-2 at rock paper scissors, jesus (2) was the most relieved man in history.
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02-04-2016, 02:43 AM (This post was last modified: 02-04-2016 02:54 AM by GirlyMan.)
RE: Did Jesus survived the crucifixion?
(01-04-2016 06:54 PM)dancefortwo Wrote:  Interesting ending too.

Life, is a state of mind.




#sigh
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02-04-2016, 10:03 AM
RE: Did Jesus survived the crucifixion?
Quote:Heck-sakes, there were 6000 people crucified in the Spartacus saga alone.

That tale survives in Appian, alone. Plutarch does not mention it. Livy's History for the period exists only in a summary form and while he mentions Crassus' victory he does not mention the crucified along the road story.

Atheism is NOT a Religion. It's A Personal Relationship With Reality!
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02-04-2016, 11:39 AM
RE: Did Jesus survived the crucifixion?
The person portrayed in the bible did not exist. But let's grant for a moment that there was a crucifixion that went along these lines.

Crucifixion was intended as a method of humiliation, and pure death through that was slow. A few days usually. Jesus died in a few hours. He was flayed and stabbed in the side.

Either he bled out or he survived.

Option one: He bled out. The followers then told people that the body disappeared. Perhaps it was stolen or cremated. Perhaps scavengers got it.

Option two: he was unconscious but alive. Possible, of course, and explains a few things. Take him down after he passed out, rehydrate him and stop the bleeding. Then let him walk out after he is stable.
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