Discount Gypsy Curse
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10-10-2014, 01:10 PM
Discount Gypsy Curse
Ok so we all know about the infamous Gypsy Curses (see the movie Thinner for a great example) they are usually earth shattering and awful. But what if there was a whole range of options for the curse you want placed on your mortal enemies? I give you the discount gypsy curse.

May the ambient temperature in your room always be too warm for a blanket but too cold without one.

May the sun always be situated in the spot the car visor does not reach.

May the cart you pick at the store always have a bad wheel and a squeak.

Come up with your own Discount Gypsy curses to annoy and delight.

(31-07-2014 04:37 PM)Luminon Wrote:  America is full of guns, but they're useless, because nobody has the courage to shoot an IRS agent in self-defense
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10-10-2014, 01:29 PM
RE: Discount Gypsy Curse
Images of your parents naked and aroused will fill your mind everytime you approach sexual climax!!!

Everytime you release faeces, no matter its size, toilet water shall splash upon you!!!

I feel so much, and yet I feel nothing.
I am a rock, I am the sky, the birds and the trees and everything beyond.
I am the wind, in the fields in which I roar. I am the water, in which I drown.
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10-10-2014, 01:39 PM
RE: Discount Gypsy Curse
The last paragraph of every novel you read will have been damaged beyond readability.

We'll love you just the way you are
If you're perfect -- Alanis Morissette
(06-02-2014 03:47 PM)Momsurroundedbyboys Wrote:  And I'm giving myself a conclusion again from all the facepalming.
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10-10-2014, 01:40 PM
RE: Discount Gypsy Curse
May your microwave never cook your food evenly, and always leave one part cold.

May your Internet service be slow, but now so slow that you upgrade to a better service.

May you always find construction on the route to wherever you are going.

May your beer ever be flat.

May you always wake up fifteen minutes before your alarm is set to go off while you really have to pee.


(Fuck, apart from my fourth one, I think I've actually run afoul with this particular gypsy.)


(10-10-2014 01:10 PM)Revenant77x Wrote:  May the sun always be situated in the spot the car visor does not reach.

That actually sounds like the most powerful curse I've ever heard of. It would probably kill everyone on the planet!
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10-10-2014, 01:41 PM
RE: Discount Gypsy Curse
There was a bunch of gypsies who moved onto some land nearby, owned by a farmer I know... He politely asked them to leave, to which they threatened to set their dogs on him.

Two hours later he returned with a dumper truck full of rubble and hardcore, and threatened to block the entrance to the field if they didn't leave within the hour... They were gone within 10 minutes.

In all, they were there from about 9am to 11:30... but in that short time, they'd stolen all the metal from one of his sheds, and siphoned diesel out of all his machinery.

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10-10-2014, 02:03 PM
RE: Discount Gypsy Curse
May your printer always jam on the last page.

May your Check Engine light always be on.

Skepticism is not a position; it is an approach to claims.
Science is not a subject, but a method.
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10-10-2014, 02:04 PM
RE: Discount Gypsy Curse
When I think of Gypsy curses, I think of that really bad movie Drag me to hell.


My Youtube channel if anyone is interested.
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCEkRdbq...rLEz-0jEHQ
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10-10-2014, 02:09 PM
RE: Discount Gypsy Curse
Quote:May his spade never dig, may his sow never pig
May each hair on his wig be well thrashed with the flail
May his roof have no thatch, may his door have no latch
May his turkeys not hatch, may the rats eat his meal
May every old fairy from Cork to Dun Laoghaire
Dip him snug and airy in river or lake
So the eel and the trout they can dine on the snout
Of the monster who murdered Nell Flaherty's drake

May his pig never grunt, may his cat never hunt
May a ghost ever haunt him at dead of the night
May his hens never lay, may his horse never neigh
May his goat fly away like an old paper kite
May the flies and the fleas and the rats ever tease
May the piercin' March breeze make him shiver and shake
May a lump of the stick raise the lumps fast and quick
On the monster who murdered Nell Flaherty's drake

... Big Grin

We'll love you just the way you are
If you're perfect -- Alanis Morissette
(06-02-2014 03:47 PM)Momsurroundedbyboys Wrote:  And I'm giving myself a conclusion again from all the facepalming.
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10-10-2014, 03:29 PM
RE: Discount Gypsy Curse
You fuckers. Curses are my dept.

When I want your opinion I'll read your entrails.
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10-10-2014, 03:31 PM
RE: Discount Gypsy Curse
(10-10-2014 03:29 PM)WitchSabrina Wrote:  You fuckers. Curses are my dept.

We assumed you only dealt in quality curses - not discount ones. Smile

Skepticism is not a position; it is an approach to claims.
Science is not a subject, but a method.
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