Divorce led me to atheism
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29-05-2013, 09:53 AM
Divorce led me to atheism
I was listening to yesterdays podcast about whether or not things happen for a reason and when the subject of theism being like an emotionally unhealthy relationship came up I had an epiphany. I got divorced about a year and a half ago, and it was a very difficult relationship. We had gotten married young (19 and 20) for mostly traditional religious reasons, such as no sex before marriage and so on. Over the course of the three years we were married we grew apart as separate people going different ways in life and wanting/believing different things. However difficult it was though, when it actually came down to the separation and her essentially leaving me for someone else, I found it to be like tearing my skin off. The truly unexpected pain and suffering of no longer having the only real romantic love I had ever experienced was devastating. I wanted nothing more than the comfort of what I had known, even if it meant giving up all reason and logic I had about the situation. I told her that whatever problems we had in the relationship, they were ALL my fault and that I would do anything just to be with her again. I would've given up all of my free will just for the consolation, basically volunteering for emotional slavery. Luckily for me she refused.

It never occurred to me just how akin to a theistic mind set this is. I was a Christian for my whole life, growing ever more questioning over the years, but never turning completely away as it was the only thing I had known as I had been fully indoctrinated since birth. It was only a few months ago that I finally began to ask the hard questions and research what I believed in. I came to the conclusion that I had been misled all those years and am now a mostly out Atheist.

It never occurred to me until today just how well the emotional process of the divorce prepared me for my departure from theism. Once I realized that I can overcome the attachment that comes from a long term relationship, It was uncannily easy for me to finally listen to the small (now very large) voice of reason in my mind.

Moral of the story: Just because it has been for as long as you can remember does not make it true, and it is better to live a life that is true than one that is comfortable.

There is much pleasure to be gained from useless knowledge.

-Bertrand Russell
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30-05-2013, 04:57 AM
RE: Divorce led me to atheism
Glad to hear you were not sucked into the long and painful death of biblical marriage. Being with someone for the rest of your life, because of a promise made when you were young. I have seen many of those marriages end with very damaged kids.

On a side note, I noticed this thread because of your name. I thought you might enjoy this womans talk on vulcan logic, or lack there of.


good luck with the new life.

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