Do you fear death?
Post Reply
 
Thread Rating:
  • 5 Votes - 4.2 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
02-01-2015, 08:31 AM
RE: Do you fear death?
(02-01-2015 07:56 AM)Im_Ryan Wrote:  I posted the song of this a while back...

Hm, I don't remember seeing that. What thread is it in? I'd like to hear that.

"Most people are other people.
Their thoughts are someone else's opinions,
their lives a mimicry,
their passions a quotation."
-Oscar Wilde
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
02-01-2015, 08:36 AM
RE: Do you fear death?
(01-01-2015 09:49 PM)LadyWallFlower Wrote:  Hello my beautiful bunch of lovely loves! (Sorry, I'm drinking a margarita at the moment)

Ok, this is actually a serious topic for me, so put your serious faces on! So I have stopped fearing hell for a while now, but recently I've been fearing death. I've just been realizing how inevitable death is. I'm afraid of my life going by too fast or dying too young. I just love living and I can't imagine ever being ready to die!

Does anyone else deal with this fear? What do you do?

So getting back to the OP I am wondering if any of this is helping? I am conscious that my posts may not have made things better. Sad

"I don't mind being wrong...it's a time I get to learn something new..."
Me.
N.B: I routinely make edits to posts to correct grammar or spelling, or to restate a point more clearly. I only notify edits if they materially change meaning.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
02-01-2015, 09:06 AM
RE: Do you fear death?
(02-01-2015 08:36 AM)gofish! Wrote:  So getting back to the OP I am wondering if any of this is helping? I am conscious that my posts may not have made things better. Sad

Actually, they did help. The thing you posted about the best thing I can hope for is having someone to hold my hand when I'm dying was actually comforting. Because there is a pretty decent chance I won't be alone when I die.

Also, reading about the people who have been close to death and how scary it actually feels, gives more explanation (as if there weren't enough already) to why people make up pleasant stories about what happens after we die.

"Most people are other people.
Their thoughts are someone else's opinions,
their lives a mimicry,
their passions a quotation."
-Oscar Wilde
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
02-01-2015, 09:14 AM
RE: Do you fear death?
(02-01-2015 09:06 AM)LadyWallFlower Wrote:  
(02-01-2015 08:36 AM)gofish! Wrote:  So getting back to the OP I am wondering if any of this is helping? I am conscious that my posts may not have made things better. Sad

Actually, they did help. The thing you posted about the best thing I can hope for is having someone to hold my hand when I'm dying was actually comforting. Because there is a pretty decent chance I won't be alone when I die.

Also, reading about the people who have been close to death and how scary it actually feels, gives more explanation (as if there weren't enough already) to why people make up pleasant stories about what happens after we die.

That's good to know.

For me, the experience of being an atheist is very often a crystal clear recognition that there is nothing to hide behind, stuck as we are to the sides of this rock like barnacles, and that we are all at the mercy of great universal natural forces we have no hope to control.

In good moments it is an exhilarating, awe-inspiring feeling, but sometimes it can be a tad scary. Smile

"I don't mind being wrong...it's a time I get to learn something new..."
Me.
N.B: I routinely make edits to posts to correct grammar or spelling, or to restate a point more clearly. I only notify edits if they materially change meaning.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 2 users Like gofish!'s post
02-01-2015, 09:26 AM
RE: Do you fear death?
Quote:How am I scary? Unsure

Keep in mind I see people kept alive on life support... For months.... I don't want that for my loved ones, or myself.

Edit: people with no hope for survival, with anoxic brain injuries. It's awful.

I dunno. I guess it's the breaking people's ribs and bypassing their lungs thing... I know it's for good but the way you described it... Confused

I've had a friend who was brain dead - family were straightforward about it though. Once she was dead machines were off the next day, after the docs had managed to take the undamaged organs... I think that's kinda cool - at least she helped other people stay alive. Note to self - must sign up as organ donor...

We'll love you just the way you are
If you're perfect -- Alanis Morissette
(06-02-2014 03:47 PM)Momsurroundedbyboys Wrote:  And I'm giving myself a conclusion again from all the facepalming.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 2 users Like morondog's post
02-01-2015, 09:28 AM
RE: Do you fear death?
(02-01-2015 06:53 AM)LadyWallFlower Wrote:  A poem I read not too long ago that I thought was beautiful:

Do not stand at my grave and weep
by Mary Elizabeth Frye

Do not stand at my grave and weep:
I am not there; I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow,
I am the diamond glints on snow,
I am the sun on ripened grain,
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning’s hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circling flight.
I am the soft starshine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry:
I am not there; I did not die.




[Image: dobie.png]Science is the process we've designed to be responsible for generating our best guess as to what the fuck is going on. Girly Man
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 4 users Like Dom's post
02-01-2015, 09:33 AM
RE: Do you fear death?
(02-01-2015 09:06 AM)LadyWallFlower Wrote:  ... gives more explanation (as if there weren't enough already) to why people make up pleasant stories about what happens after we die.

An additional explanation might be that we make up stories about everything all our lives, and dying and death is no different.

As LadyWallFlower, perhaps your story about yourself might be that you a kind, sensitive, articulate person wrestling with some big thoughts.

As Baba Bozo, my story about myself is that I'm the ornery bastard with a heart of gold who has breathtakingly deep insights in to the human condition. :-)

For many of our friends here, their stories about themselves are that they are so smart that they know what doesn't exist in an arena they can't define, and this makes them superior intellects to the theists among us.

Some of the readers will have a story about themselves that they are shy folks who really don't know what to type here, but for some reason they enjoy quietly reading.

As humans we all have stories about everything and everybody all the time, and they're always a crazy scrambled stew of fact and fiction.

So why would death be any different?
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes Baba Bozo's post
02-01-2015, 09:37 AM
RE: Do you fear death?
I'm not afraid of death itself, or being dead, but I am afraid of losing my life... If that makes sense. I love living, being conscious, experiencing the universe.

The idea that it can all just be taken from you in an instant is scary... But, it is irrational, because the dead don't know they are dead, and its not as if they will miss life. I don't know whether I would prefer to know I was dying months in advance, or just be struck down without warning. I suppose an argument can be made for each.

Its easy to try and imagine how you would react to the diagnosis of a terminal disease, but very often people react in completely unexpected ways... Many people have reported feeling euphoric after receiving the news. Not because the want to die, but because it forces them to live in the moment, and to savor every second of existence.

[img]

via GIPHY

[/img]
Visit this user's website Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 3 users Like Sam's post
02-01-2015, 09:51 AM
RE: Do you fear death?
I want you all to know that, even if I don't respond to every reply, I am taking your replies and stories to heart. It's nice to know people understand this fear and many understand it even more than I do. I've been pondering all these responses this morning and talking to my husband about your replies and your stories. Fear is an ugly thing, but the human experience is beautiful. And I think death makes life more beautiful.

(02-01-2015 12:01 AM)Im_Ryan Wrote:  Then think of death as your next* experience?

*not literally next, but you know what I mean

Yes! That's is how I'm going to look at it now. It's just a part of life.

(02-01-2015 01:13 AM)Cthulhu Dreaming Wrote:  Not so much anymore. I used to. In the last three years, I had two close brushes with my own mortality. I'm not in any hurry to die, but I figure after the first, every day I had left was a freebie, and that allowed me to face the second with a zen-like acceptance.

My husband said something like that. I want to have that kind of acceptance. My husband said to look at death as going into ultimate peacefulness. Even though I will not exist, I do right now and it's just easier to see death as peace and serenity.

(02-01-2015 01:28 AM)freetoreason Wrote:  I've been spending a lot of time on it lately as well and exploring its visceral anguish, as well as searching for a strange beauty in what is the ultimate expression of devotion and endearment. I feel like I'm on to something, for my own understanding.

I'll have more to say later as I'm currently trying to sort it out. Saw an interesting title in the bookstore today on the history of death in different cultures.

Wonderful conversation!

Very interesting! I'm excited to hear what you'll have to say later. Smile

(02-01-2015 05:07 AM)GenericBox Wrote:  I don't think anyone is really afraid of the state of death -- but I'm afraid of death in that I'm not living.

People have said to me the logic posted earlier in this thread: "you weren't alive before you were born and you didn't fear it" -- yeah, but before I was born I hadn't experienced LIFE yet. Now that I've experienced LIFE I don't want to stop experience it.

I'm 25 and I've died 7 times now --

I know exactly what you mean when you say "but I'm afraid of death in that I'm not living." I almost posted that but I wasn't sure if anyone would understand. Somehow saying that I'm afraid of not living explains my fear better than if I said that I'm afraid of dying/death.

I'm sorry for your awful experiences. I hope things get better for you. Even if you're scared, you are very brave. Thumbsup

(02-01-2015 05:26 AM)The Polyglot Atheist Wrote:  I also disagree with those that say "It's like going to sleep, you're not afraid of going to sleep". Well, that's because I expect to wake up again the next morning. Dying is perpetual, at least as far as we know eheh, so I fail to see the analogy.

I hate the idea of dying and in my transition to become an atheist, discovering that my eternal life was gone was a bit of a shock. Not for heaven, but the idea that I might not "survive" my death and live as a spirit. I realized that I would just stop existing, and to be honest I don't want to.

Many atheist say they're happy that their existence stops, but I never managed to agree with that line of thought. If forced eternity is hell, then forced death is no better either.

Damn you existence, at least let me choose!

I feel the same way! I like existing too, lol. That's why part of me hopes I become a ghost when I die. Not like a scary ghost. Like the ghosts off of Harry Potter. Wink

(02-01-2015 09:14 AM)gofish! Wrote:  In good moments it is an exhilarating, awe-inspiring feeling, but sometimes it can be a tad scary. Smile

I agree! That's how I feel whenever I watch documentaries about space. It's so awesome and gorgeous but I feel so small and everything feels uncertain! We could just get sucked into a black hole and that would be it! Although, what a way to go!! Big Grin

"Most people are other people.
Their thoughts are someone else's opinions,
their lives a mimicry,
their passions a quotation."
-Oscar Wilde
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 3 users Like LadyWallFlower's post
02-01-2015, 09:56 AM
RE: Do you fear death?
I am not scared of death.

The times when people are most scared is when they first wrap their head around it (teenagers, scary shit because everything is so dramatic then) and when they are raising offspring.

After that, your parents die, your aunts and uncles die, everyone who was around when you were a kid is dead. You are more and more exposed to death, and it hurts but you still don't draw the parallels to yourself much.

Then your peers start dying. Now you can identify. You can see the horror and the peace, depending on how death happens around you. Your own body starts failing in many little ways. Time starts flying by, a year is nothing much anymore.

At that time, if you are lucky and made it thus far, you become friends with your own death. The survival instinct decreases as responsibilities decrease (no more kids to worry about).

Personally, I will do my darndest to pre-empt a painful, drawn out death.

I enjoy life. And because of that, I will likely die by my own hand someday. A good life, a good death, that's the plan.

At no time will I allow myself to be at the mercy of strangers, lying in some hospital bed, being kept alive for more and more suffering. WTF is that? Who is going to benefit if you linger on a few more days? The hospital, that's who. Not you, and not your relatives, even though they are likely clinging to straws and waiting for miracles...

Nope, when I get to a point where I can't take proper care of myself, I will take the exit of my choosing at the time of my choosing. And you know what? Thousands of older people do it all the time. It's just usually covered up and hush hush. Bet someone in your family did it and you never heard.

So, don't worry, for most people the fear of death gets smaller and smaller the older you get. What remains is the distaste for suffering. If you want to make things easy for yourself, stand up for death with dignity laws. All states should have it to where terminal and suffering people can receive medical help to choose the exit as needed.

And nurse, I love your posts in this thread. Thumbsup

[Image: dobie.png]Science is the process we've designed to be responsible for generating our best guess as to what the fuck is going on. Girly Man
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 5 users Like Dom's post
Post Reply
Forum Jump: