Doc's mephitic Sunday School (silent but deadly since 2013)
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11-05-2013, 04:53 PM (This post was last modified: 11-05-2013 04:59 PM by JAH.)
RE: DOC'S HOLISTIC SUNDAY SCHOOL (WHERE WE TEACH THE WHOLE BIBLE)
Revenant77x, I beg to differ, the foothills of California are the Meth capital of the world. Got the midwest all beat to hell.

doc, don't worry remember this is the stoners in the back row. And please do not kick us out we need this class to graduate.

Oh and doc you allowed all that stuff about Bollywood, we could report you to the principal or whoever is in charge of this school.
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11-05-2013, 05:16 PM
DOC'S HOLISTIC SUNDAY SCHOOL (WHERE WE TEACH THE WHOLE BIBLE)
(11-05-2013 04:53 PM)JAH Wrote:  Revenant77x, I beg to differ, the foothills of California are the Meth capital of the world. Got the midwest all beat to hell.

doc, don't worry remember this is the stoners in the back row. And please do not kick us out we need this class to graduate.

Oh and doc you allowed all that stuff about Bollywood, we could report you to the principal or whoever is in charge of this school.

I live in Lake Elsinore, CA. Meth country: confirmed!
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11-05-2013, 05:34 PM
RE: DOC'S HOLISTIC SUNDAY SCHOOL (WHERE WE TEACH THE WHOLE BIBLE)
(11-05-2013 04:53 PM)JAH Wrote:  Revenant77x, I beg to differ, the foothills of California are the Meth capital of the world. Got the midwest all beat to hell.

doc, don't worry remember this is the stoners in the back row. And please do not kick us out we need this class to graduate.

Oh and doc you allowed all that stuff about Bollywood, we could report you to the principal or whoever is in charge of this school.

I bow to your superior Meth knowledge.

(31-07-2014 04:37 PM)Luminon Wrote:  America is full of guns, but they're useless, because nobody has the courage to shoot an IRS agent in self-defense
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11-05-2013, 08:24 PM
RE: DOC'S HOLISTIC SUNDAY SCHOOL (WHERE WE TEACH THE WHOLE BIBLE)
(11-05-2013 04:26 PM)Revenant77x Wrote:  
(11-05-2013 03:52 PM)cjs Wrote:  JAH I'll swing by Copperhead Road on the way to the bridge and pick up some of the good stuff!





Grab some Moonshine while you're there and we can turn this into a party. Granted none of us will remember what the hell happened.

I have thought that, had that song been written later than the 1980s, there might have been a 4th verse about the family business expanding into meth. But we will limit our soirée to moonshine and weed!
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11-05-2013, 08:26 PM
RE: DOC'S HOLISTIC SUNDAY SCHOOL (WHERE WE TEACH THE WHOLE BIBLE)
(11-05-2013 04:41 PM)docskeptic Wrote:  Doc, listening to the above exchange, hugs his Bible to his chest: I have a feeling I'm not in Kansas anymore.

Definitely not, and I feel transported from the Bible Belt as well!
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11-05-2013, 11:38 PM
DOC'S HOLISTIC SUNDAY SCHOOL (WHERE WE TEACH THE WHOLE BIBLE)
Perhaps we should try breaking into the lab, guys?
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12-05-2013, 04:32 AM (This post was last modified: 12-05-2013 04:36 AM by docskeptic.)
RE: DOC'S HOLISTIC SUNDAY SCHOOL (WHERE WE TEACH THE WHOLE BIBLE)
cjs: I'm gonna join the stoner's back row since I'm joining this class near the end of the semester. Best Sunday school class ever!

Doc: Flattery will get you anywhere, but why did you insinuate earlier that you doubted the virgin birth of Jesus?

cjs: Well, think about it. If Jesus was fully human as well as fully God, he had to have had the normal human DNA complement of 46 chromosomes. Also, for some reason, God favored David and promised that the Messiah would come from his bloodline in Jeremiah 23:5, hence the importance of proving that Mary was descended from David (as documented in Luke's genealogy). If that be the case, 23 of Jesus's chromosomes had to have come from Mary, but where would the remaining 23 have come from?

Doc: Obviously from a "divine" spermatozoon.

cjs: Obviously. But consider this. Hebrews 10:5 has Jesus saying to God, "Sacrifice and offering you did not desire, but a body you prepared for me", suggesting that a human body had been prepared in advance for Christ's spirit to inhabit. However, the process of ovulation in humans is random. Which ovary contains the dominant follicle destined to form the ovum appears to be chosen at random. Also, each ovum is genetically distinct from its compatriots, as is each spermatozoon, hence the differences between siblings and non-identical twins.

If then, Mary had been impregnated during a different ovarian cycle, would we have had a different Jesus from the one we now know? What if the new Jesus had no interest in religion? What if he wanted to be a musician or a mathematician? How different would our society look now! If there could have been no other alternative, then this suggests that God's actions and the timing of his divine plan were constrained by a Jewish peasant girl's menstrual cycle, hardly the position for an omnipotent deity to find himself in! How can you fail to see that Jesus must have been the product of a normal conception rather than a divine one?

Doc: As my old Sunday School teacher once said, "Faith without reason puts "da fun" back in "fundamental""!

cjs (muttering): More like "da mental", you mean.
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12-05-2013, 05:00 AM
RE: DOC'S HOLISTIC SUNDAY SCHOOL (WHERE WE TEACH THE WHOLE BIBLE)
(12-05-2013 04:32 AM)docskeptic Wrote:  cjs: I'm gonna join the stoner's back row since I'm joining this class near the end of the semester. Best Sunday school class ever!

Doc: Flattery will get you anywhere, but why did you insinuate earlier that you doubted the virgin birth of Jesus?

cjs: Well, think about it. If Jesus was fully human as well as fully God, he had to have had the normal human DNA complement of 46 chromosomes. Also, for some reason, God favored David and promised that the Messiah would come from his bloodline in Jeremiah 23:5, hence the importance of proving that Mary was descended from David (as documented in Luke's genealogy). If that be the case, 23 of Jesus's chromosomes had to have come from Mary, but where would the remaining 23 have come from?

Doc: Obviously from a "divine" spermatozoon.

cjs: Obviously. But consider this. Hebrews 10:5 has Jesus saying to God, "Sacrifice and offering you did not desire, but a body you prepared for me", suggesting that a human body had been prepared in advance for Christ's spirit to inhabit. However, the process of ovulation in humans is random. Which ovary contains the dominant follicle destined to form the ovum appears to be chosen at random. Also, each ovum is genetically distinct from its compatriots, as is each spermatozoon, hence the differences between siblings and non-identical twins.

If then, Mary had been impregnated during a different ovarian cycle, would we have had a different Jesus from the one we now know? What if the new Jesus had no interest in religion? What if he wanted to be a musician or a mathematician? How different would our society look now! If there could have been no other alternative, then this suggests that God's actions and the timing of his divine plan were constrained by a Jewish peasant girl's menstrual cycle, hardly the position for an omnipotent deity to find himself in! How can you fail to see that Jesus must have been the product of a normal conception rather than a divine one?

Doc: As my old Sunday School teacher once said, "Faith without reason puts "da fun" back in "fundamental""!

cjs (muttering): More like "da mental", you mean.

Even if Jeebus was the product of a different ovarian cycle, his career options were still limited. You had a choice of 3 in those days
1. Peasant farmer
2. Fisherman
3. Messiah....which meant you tried to start a war with Rome and got killed for your trouble.
Our Jeebus made a bad choice.
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12-05-2013, 07:04 AM (This post was last modified: 12-05-2013 07:35 AM by docskeptic.)
RE: DOC'S HOLISTIC SUNDAY SCHOOL (WHERE WE TEACH THE WHOLE BIBLE)
(12-05-2013 05:00 AM)Mark Fulton Wrote:  
(12-05-2013 04:32 AM)docskeptic Wrote:  cjs: I'm gonna join the stoner's back row since I'm joining this class near the end of the semester. Best Sunday school class ever!

Doc: Flattery will get you anywhere, but why did you insinuate earlier that you doubted the virgin birth of Jesus?

cjs: Well, think about it. If Jesus was fully human as well as fully God, he had to have had the normal human DNA complement of 46 chromosomes. Also, for some reason, God favored David and promised that the Messiah would come from his bloodline in Jeremiah 23:5, hence the importance of proving that Mary was descended from David (as documented in Luke's genealogy). If that be the case, 23 of Jesus's chromosomes had to have come from Mary, but where would the remaining 23 have come from?

Doc: Obviously from a "divine" spermatozoon.

cjs: Obviously. But consider this. Hebrews 10:5 has Jesus saying to God, "Sacrifice and offering you did not desire, but a body you prepared for me", suggesting that a human body had been prepared in advance for Christ's spirit to inhabit. However, the process of ovulation in humans is random. Which ovary contains the dominant follicle destined to form the ovum appears to be chosen at random. Also, each ovum is genetically distinct from its compatriots, as is each spermatozoon, hence the differences between siblings and non-identical twins.

If then, Mary had been impregnated during a different ovarian cycle, would we have had a different Jesus from the one we now know? What if the new Jesus had no interest in religion? What if he wanted to be a musician or a mathematician? How different would our society look now! If there could have been no other alternative, then this suggests that God's actions and the timing of his divine plan were constrained by a Jewish peasant girl's menstrual cycle, hardly the position for an omnipotent deity to find himself in! How can you fail to see that Jesus must have been the product of a normal conception rather than a divine one?

Doc: As my old Sunday School teacher once said, "Faith without reason puts "da fun" back in "fundamental""!

cjs (muttering): More like "da mental", you mean.

Even if Jeebus was the product of a different ovarian cycle, his career options were still limited. You had a choice of 3 in those days
1. Peasant farmer
2. Fisherman
3. Messiah....which meant you tried to start a war with Rome and got killed for your trouble.
Our Jeebus made a bad choice.

Oh, I don't know, Mark. I could picture Jesus as a musician. You know, long hair and beard. Dreamy expression. Catchy lyrics such as, "Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites, because you devour widows' houses"

I think Jesus and the Diss-iples is a great band name and with hits such as "Sermon on the Mount" and "Golden Rule", Jesus had the potential of being bigger than the Beatles.

Doc
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12-05-2013, 08:19 AM
RE: DOC'S HOLISTIC SUNDAY SCHOOL (WHERE WE TEACH THE WHOLE BIBLE)
Jesus and the Dissiples--so that's where Iron Butterfly stole In-a-Gadda-da-Vida from...now it's all making sense! That and the biology discussion are expanding my consciousness, man....

Godless in the Magnolia State
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