Doc's mephitic Sunday School (silent but deadly since 2013)
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12-05-2013, 09:38 AM
DOC'S HOLISTIC SUNDAY SCHOOL (WHERE WE TEACH THE WHOLE BIBLE)
So Jesus' body was simply an avatar controlled by an alien in earth's orbit? Mary was just a convenient incubator?
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12-05-2013, 11:34 PM
RE: DOC'S HOLISTIC SUNDAY SCHOOL (WHERE WE TEACH THE WHOLE BIBLE)
OK doc I have been on a 72 hour meth run. When I was not taking apart the stove and cleaning it thoroughly or clearing the refrigerator and also taking it apart and cleaning it thoroughly, I had a thought. I am going to crash for the next 48 hours so your response does not have to be quick.

In the OT god was all over the place smiting various opponents to the Israelites, talking directly to people and so on. In the NT he sent a physical manifestation of himself (I know it is awkward but to the extent I know the manifestation of god it is always male besides how else could god have impregnated mary) and that manifestation preformed miracles and such. Then he disappeared. What happened. Did god disappear from human life or what.
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13-05-2013, 10:16 AM (This post was last modified: 13-05-2013 04:19 PM by docskeptic.)
RE: DOC'S HOLISTIC SUNDAY SCHOOL (WHERE WE TEACH THE WHOLE BIBLE)
Cardinal Smurf: So Jesus' body was simply an avatar controlled by an alien in earth's orbit? Mary was just a convenient incubator?

Doc (shocked): What do you mean, young man?

Cardinal Smurf: I mean, Luke 1:35 says that the Holy Spirit would come upon Mary and that the power of the Most High would overshadow her and she would conceive. What did that process look like from her point of view? Did the Spirit assume the shape of a man with all the necessary appurtenances to perform the deed?

Doc (shuddering at the blasphemy): Of course not! I believe that God created sperm as a stand-alone product and introduced it into Mary.

Cardinal Smurf: A single spermatozoon or a packet of sperm? The latter would imply that there could have been alternate Christs, each with a distinct genetic makeup.

Doc: All right. A single spermatozoon, then.

Cardinal Smurf: And, where did Jesus's divinity come from? Certainly not from Mary's ovum. The source had to be the "divine" spermatozoon. How did this "divine" spermatozoon differ from a "normal" one? And what made it divine? The genetic makeup? There's not much else in a spermatozoon that divinity can rest in. If so, then surely we can reproduce that specific genetic combination in the laboratory (at least in principle). If the "divine" spermatozoon is indistinguishable from a "normal" one, then could the source not have been a normal male, like the Pantera that the Roman historian Celsus, wrote about?

Doc (waving his hand mysteriously): You don't need science to explain all that. Faith will do.

Cardinal Smurf: Faith is no good out here. I need something more real.

Doc (waving his hand again): But faith will do fine.

Cardinal Smurf: No, it won't. What? You think you're some kind of evangelist or something, waving your hand around like that? I'm a realist. Faith doesn't work on me. Only facts.

Doc: Pudu!
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13-05-2013, 10:33 AM
RE: DOC'S HOLISTIC SUNDAY SCHOOL (WHERE WE TEACH THE WHOLE BIBLE)
(13-05-2013 10:16 AM)docskeptic Wrote:  Cardinal Smurf: So Jesus' body was simply an avatar controlled by an alien in earth's orbit? Mary was just a convenient incubator?

Doc (shocked): What do you mean, young man?

Cardinal Smurf: I mean, Luke 1:35 says that the Holy Spirit would come upon Mary and that the power of the Most High would overshadow her and she would conceive. What did that process look like from her point of view? Did the Spirit assume the shape of a man with all the necessary appurtenances to perform the deed?

Doc (shuddering at the blasphemy): Of course not! I believe that God created sperm as a stand-alone product and introduced it into Mary.

Cardinal Smurf: A single spermatozoon or a packet of sperm? The latter would imply that there could have been alternate Christs, each with a distinct genetic makeup.

Doc: All right. A single spermatozoon, then.

Cardinal Smurf: And, where did Jesus's divinity come from? Certainly not from Mary's ovum. The source had to be the "divine" spermatozoon. How did this "divine" spermatozoon differ from a "normal" one? And what made it divine? The genetic makeup? There's not much else in a spermatozoon that divinity can rest in. If so, then surely we can reproduce that specific genetic combination in the laboratory (at least in principle). If the "divine" spermatozoon is indistinguishable from a "normal" one, then could the source not have been a normal male, like the Pantera that the Roman historian Celsus, wrote about?

Doc (waving his hand mysteriously): You don't need science to explain all that. Faith will do.

Cardinal Smurf: Faith is no good out here. I need something more real.

Doc (waving his hand again): But faith will do fine.

Cardinal Smurf: No, it won't. What? You think you're some kind of evangelist or something, waving your hand around like that? I'm a realist. Faith doesn't work on me. Only facts.

Doc: Bantha pudu!

Doc don't you know we all minored in Jedi. Thos force tricks wont work on the likes of us.

(31-07-2014 04:37 PM)Luminon Wrote:  America is full of guns, but they're useless, because nobody has the courage to shoot an IRS agent in self-defense
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13-05-2013, 04:06 PM
RE: DOC'S HOLISTIC SUNDAY SCHOOL (WHERE WE TEACH THE WHOLE BIBLE)
(13-05-2013 10:16 AM)docskeptic Wrote:  Cardinal Smurf: I mean, Luke 1:35 says that the Holy Spirit would come upon Mary and that the power of the Most High would overshadow her and she would conceive. What did that process look like from her point of view? Did the Spirit assume the shape of a man with all the necessary appurtenances to perform the deeu!

(Giggling in back stoner row about the above pun about the Holy Spirit coming upon Mary)
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13-05-2013, 05:24 PM
DOC'S HOLISTIC SUNDAY SCHOOL (WHERE WE TEACH THE WHOLE BIBLE)
(13-05-2013 04:06 PM)cjs Wrote:  
(13-05-2013 10:16 AM)docskeptic Wrote:  Cardinal Smurf: I mean, Luke 1:35 says that the Holy Spirit would come upon Mary and that the power of the Most High would overshadow her and she would conceive. What did that process look like from her point of view? Did the Spirit assume the shape of a man with all the necessary appurtenances to perform the deeu!

(Giggling in back stoner row about the above pun about the Holy Spirit coming upon Mary)

Oh there's a bit more innuendo than just that:

(13-05-2013 10:16 AM)docskeptic Wrote:  and that the power of the Most High would overshadow her and she would conceive.
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13-05-2013, 06:26 PM
RE: DOC'S HOLISTIC SUNDAY SCHOOL (WHERE WE TEACH THE WHOLE BIBLE)
So now, Cardinal Smurf, I'm not just tittering, the whole back row has fallen out snorting with full-on stoner Cheech-and-Chong laughs!

Godless in the Magnolia State
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13-05-2013, 08:10 PM
RE: DOC'S HOLISTIC SUNDAY SCHOOL (WHERE WE TEACH THE WHOLE BIBLE)
Cardinal Smurf: Oh there's a bit more innuendo than just that.

Doc: Cardinal-a Smurf, you bad-da boy. You wash you mouth out with a-da soap!
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13-05-2013, 08:14 PM
RE: DOC'S HOLISTIC SUNDAY SCHOOL (WHERE WE TEACH THE WHOLE BIBLE)
(13-05-2013 08:10 PM)docskeptic Wrote:  Cardinal Smurf: Oh there's a bit more innuendo than just that.

Doc: Cardinal-a Smurf, you bad-da boy. You wash you mouth out with a-da soap!

/raises hand "Hey Doc I remember hearing about a gospel of Jesus as a kid. They said he was like Dennis the menace. What's up with that?"

(31-07-2014 04:37 PM)Luminon Wrote:  America is full of guns, but they're useless, because nobody has the courage to shoot an IRS agent in self-defense
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13-05-2013, 09:15 PM
RE: DOC'S HOLISTIC SUNDAY SCHOOL (WHERE WE TEACH THE WHOLE BIBLE)
As I laugh in the the back row, without snorting I will say, I think we in the stoners row should be quiet. doc does have his moments and remember we need this class to graduate.
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