E mail from god?
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04-03-2012, 04:37 AM
E mail from god?
One day God was looking down at Earth and saw all of the misbehavior that was going on. So he called one of His angels and sent the angel to Earth for a time.

When he returned, he told God, 'Yes, it is bad on Earth; 95% are misbehaving and only 5% are not.

God thought for a moment and said, 'Maybe I had better send down a
second angel to get another opinion.'

So God called another angel and sent him to Earth for a time.

When the angel returned he went to God and said, 'Yes, it's true. The
Earth is in decline; 95% are misbehaving, but 5% are being good.'

God was not pleased So He decided to e-mail the 5% that were good, because he wanted to encourage them, and give them a little something to help them keep going.

Do you know what the e-mail said?

Okay, I was just wondering, because I didn't get one either.

When I find myself in times of trouble, Richard Dawkins comes to me, speaking words of reason, now I see, now I see.
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04-03-2012, 04:46 AM
RE: E mail from god?
Yes, I got one but unfortunately the first line (after the usual, hi, howya doin', this is god again - small talk kinda stuff) was the commandment that I was not allowed to speak about the content of the email.

I am however, permitted to write a book with cryptic messages in an undecipherable language.

I've been working on the book for a while but you know how things are, I'm a bit busy at work so I'm only on around page 666.

Then, I need to get it reviewed but a Mr Gabriel has said he's going to help, like he did last time so that should speed things up a bit.

I'll keep you posted.

Cheers
DLJ (part of the chosen 5%)

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04-03-2012, 06:03 AM
RE: E mail from god?
It said something about, he was the king of heaven and that his son died. And I have been chosen to hold a large sum of money, and that I should send my bank account details immediately.

He also sent me a few other emails trying to sell me cheap Viagra, and in a couple he claimed to be my bank and that I should send my bank details Dodgy

Behold the power of the force!
[Image: fgYtjtY.gif]
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04-03-2012, 06:25 AM
RE: E mail from god?
Must have went straight to my 'spam' box... Now that I think of it, it was the same as FSM-scot's mail... Wow - small world.

"I feel like the weight of the world has been lifted from my shoulders...
Thanks for getting off my back!"
-
Arcticspear Idea
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04-03-2012, 08:56 AM
RE: E mail from god?
For those who deleted it with looking, this is the entire content:



----------- HOLD ON -----------
---------
GOOD GUYS ----------
--------
It won't be long now! --------

If you pray to anything, you're prey to anything.
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04-03-2012, 12:08 PM
RE: E mail from god?
I got an email from god yesterday.
He said he was draining satan's bank account, and wanted to know if he could use mine temporarily to hold all the money in it. All I had to do was deposit the check he'll send me, then mail him the balance after keeping 5% for myself...

[Image: 21omssh.jpg]
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04-03-2012, 12:11 PM
RE: E mail from god?
(04-03-2012 08:56 AM)Peterkin Wrote:  For those who deleted it with looking, this is the entire content:



----------- HOLD ON -----------
---------
GOOD GUYS ----------
--------
It won't be long now! --------

aaa ! aaaa! I'm COMING !!!!!!
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04-03-2012, 11:09 PM
RE: E mail from god?
E-mail? Plz, you no wonder you haven't heard from God. He only uses Facebook these days.


[Image: godfacebook.jpg?w=593]

"Ain't got no last words to say, yellow streak right up my spine. The gun in my mouth was real and the taste blew my mind."

"We see you cry. We turn your head. Then we slap your face. We see you try. We see you fail. Some things never change."
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05-03-2012, 02:59 AM
RE: E mail from god?
I love that picture, just shared it on facebook myself.
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