Feminism's doublespeak with perpetual victimhood
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02-04-2015, 10:23 AM
RE: Feminism's doublespeak with perpetual victimhood
I doubt there is as much of a pattern between feminists and similar schools of thought as there is with atheists.

But in regards to the paying a stay at home mom to stay at home, the lady you talked to just has her head up her ass. In my personal opinion, the option to be a stay at home mom is a luxury in this economic climate - your average middle class job doesn't make enough to support a family on one income. I could have stayed at home with my son, but I would have spent most of my time clipping coupons and bargain shopping to try and make ends meet. I wanted a career and money for things like going to the movies and eating out, so I paid a daycare to watch my son while I was at work (now he goes to school), and still came home and cooked and cleaned my house.

"If there's a single thing that life teaches us, it's that wishing doesn't make it so." - Lev Grossman
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02-04-2015, 10:35 AM
RE: Feminism's doublespeak with perpetual victimhood
(02-04-2015 10:23 AM)Nurse Wrote:  I doubt there is as much of a pattern between feminists and similar schools of thought as there is with atheists.

But in regards to the paying a stay at home mom to stay at home, the lady you talked to just has her head up her ass. In my personal opinion, the option to be a stay at home mom is a luxury in this economic climate - your average middle class job doesn't make enough to support a family on one income. I could have stayed at home with my son, but I would have spent most of my time clipping coupons and bargain shopping to try and make ends meet. I wanted a career and money for things like going to the movies and eating out, so I paid a daycare to watch my son while I was at work (now he goes to school), and still came home and cooked and cleaned my house.

I hope you don't think I was looking for a particular answer one way or the other, just a reasonable answer. You have given one and I appreciate it. Those of us that genuinely want to understand are often shut down by defensive people(I'm not such a person, I will always question). Thanks for being cool... Smile
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02-04-2015, 10:42 AM
RE: Feminism's doublespeak with perpetual victimhood
(02-04-2015 10:09 AM)Drunkin Druid Wrote:  .But hey, why give a straight answer to an honest question? It's not like this is a community of free thinkers.. Oh wait....

My point was that your acquaintances comment is not a feminist position so how can you really ask what feminists think about it? It's like asking for the atheist position on.... well, anything other than belief in gods.

As for the basic idea, I've seen this before and it's nonsense. You don't want to stay home with the kids, then go to work and pay for daycare. Or, try charging the kid for the services you provide. This person has an incredible sense of entitlement.

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When ignorance reigns, life is lost
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02-04-2015, 10:56 AM
RE: Feminism's doublespeak with perpetual victimhood
(02-04-2015 10:42 AM)BnW Wrote:  
(02-04-2015 10:09 AM)Drunkin Druid Wrote:  .But hey, why give a straight answer to an honest question? It's not like this is a community of free thinkers.. Oh wait....

My point was that your acquaintances comment is not a feminist position so how can you really ask what feminists think about it? It's like asking for the atheist position on.... well, anything other than belief in gods.

As for the basic idea, I've seen this before and it's nonsense. You don't want to stay home with the kids, then go to work and pay for daycare. Or, try charging the kid for the services you provide. This person has an incredible sense of entitlement.

Why not ask what feminists think about what an individual feminist said?
If all feminist think this way I want to know about it. If the individual was misrepresenting feminism I want to know that as well. It seem the only way to find out is to ask a feminist for an opinion. I don't see the problem here..
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02-04-2015, 11:13 AM
RE: Feminism's doublespeak with perpetual victimhood
I'm a feminist and I think it's a silly thing. I could choose to stay home. I choose however to go out and become an engineer. I wouldn't ask that a living be provided for me. That's not fair. I want to MAKE a living, and have the money I get not be alms, but be MINE. As a result of my own work and my own effort.

I'm not saying raising kids and running a home aren't hard work, but it is a choice and a luxury at that.
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02-04-2015, 12:23 PM
RE: Feminism's doublespeak with perpetual victimhood
(02-04-2015 10:23 AM)Nurse Wrote:  I doubt there is as much of a pattern between feminists and similar schools of thought as there is with atheists.

But in regards to the paying a stay at home mom to stay at home, the lady you talked to just has her head up her ass. In my personal opinion, the option to be a stay at home mom is a luxury in this economic climate - your average middle class job doesn't make enough to support a family on one income. I could have stayed at home with my son, but I would have spent most of my time clipping coupons and bargain shopping to try and make ends meet. I wanted a career and money for things like going to the movies and eating out, so I paid a daycare to watch my son while I was at work (now he goes to school), and still came home and cooked and cleaned my house.

I think some countries do actually give an entitlement to mothers to stay home until their child reaches school age. I don't know if there is a criteria to qualify (like they already have to be poor or something) or if it's tied other assistance like housing or whatever...

I seem to recall a friend in Australia in a panic to get pregnant again before her kid went to school so she wouldn't lose that money.

I stayed home after our first was born, only because decent daycare was so expensive and I'd be making just enough to cover the cost. I had planned on returning to work when my youngest started school, but he is special needs and I needed to be around a lot.


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02-04-2015, 01:08 PM
RE: Feminism's doublespeak with perpetual victimhood
I don't think it's unreasonable to be a stay at home mama... Maybe there's also a good argument to subsidise mums to stay at home - lower rates of delinquent little shits later, better for the economy blah blah etc. I wouldn't know.

DD, I said feminism was about equality and nothing more, what I meant was, the way you presented it, what your lady friend was suggesting sounded like something *unequal*. Feminism for me is about a fair deal. It's definitely not about saying "women are better than men and must get more free shit".

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(06-02-2014 03:47 PM)Momsurroundedbyboys Wrote:  And I'm giving myself a conclusion again from all the facepalming.
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02-04-2015, 01:21 PM
RE: Feminism's doublespeak with perpetual victimhood
(02-04-2015 01:08 PM)morondog Wrote:  I don't think it's unreasonable to be a stay at home parent... Maybe there's also a good argument to subsidise parents to stay at home - lower rates of delinquent little shits later, better for the economy blah blah etc. I wouldn't know.

Fixt.

Sorry, but the thread IS about feminism after all. Thumbsup

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02-04-2015, 01:56 PM
RE: Feminism's doublespeak with perpetual victimhood
(02-04-2015 01:21 PM)Stark Raving Wrote:  
(02-04-2015 01:08 PM)morondog Wrote:  I don't think it's unreasonable to be a stay at home parent caregiver... Maybe there's also a good argument to subsidise parents caregivers to stay at home - lower rates of delinquent little shits later, better for the economy blah blah etc. I wouldn't know.

Fixt.

Sorry, but the thread IS about feminism after all. Thumbsup

Yeah, and we mustn't forget all the people without kids of their own who might coincidentally (through non-violent accidental kidnapping or other means) find themselves looking after the aforementioned little shits ("little shit" is a gender neutral term)... Tongue

We'll love you just the way you are
If you're perfect -- Alanis Morissette
(06-02-2014 03:47 PM)Momsurroundedbyboys Wrote:  And I'm giving myself a conclusion again from all the facepalming.
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02-04-2015, 04:34 PM
RE: Feminism's doublespeak with perpetual victimhood
(02-04-2015 10:56 AM)Drunkin Druid Wrote:  
(02-04-2015 10:42 AM)BnW Wrote:  My point was that your acquaintances comment is not a feminist position so how can you really ask what feminists think about it? It's like asking for the atheist position on.... well, anything other than belief in gods.

As for the basic idea, I've seen this before and it's nonsense. You don't want to stay home with the kids, then go to work and pay for daycare. Or, try charging the kid for the services you provide. This person has an incredible sense of entitlement.

Why not ask what feminists think about what an individual feminist said?
If all feminist think this way I want to know about it. If the individual was misrepresenting feminism I want to know that as well. It seem the only way to find out is to ask a feminist for an opinion. I don't see the problem here..

Ok. I wasn't trying to pick a fight or be dismissive. I just thought it was an odd question, as if all feminists should be aligned on all issues outside their primary agenda of gender equality. I just saw it along the lines of asking a Native American if all Native Americans are against the Designated Hitter rule (and all Native Americans, and right minded people everywhere, should be against the DH as it's an abomination).

Shackle their minds when they're bent on the cross
When ignorance reigns, life is lost
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