Finally coming out
Post Reply
 
Thread Rating:
  • 0 Votes - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
17-01-2013, 11:45 AM
RE: Finally coming out
(17-01-2013 11:38 AM)ollydolly Wrote:  I'm 21 and will be moving out soon but I am still relying on my parents for financial support for college. I guess there is no reason that I "MUST" come out, it's just an overwhelming feeling that I want to stop living a lie and tip-toeing around them. I'm not to worried about being disowned or financially cut off, my parents are very loving and I just think they deserve the truth :/
I always suggest people use great caution when they talk about coming out about this. Even if you think your parents are supportive and loving, the motivation of eternal hell-fire, and heaven does come into play with emotions. Their reaction might not be as loving and supportive as you hoped. Many, many people are shocked by the reaction when they come out about their atheism.

Wind's in the east, a mist coming in
Like something is brewing and about to begin
Can't put my finger on what lies in store
but I feel what's to happen has happened before...


Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes Momsurroundedbyboys's post
17-01-2013, 11:48 AM
RE: Finally coming out
(17-01-2013 11:44 AM)Chas Wrote:  
(17-01-2013 11:38 AM)ollydolly Wrote:  I'm 21 and will be moving out soon but I am still relying on my parents for financial support for college. I guess there is no reason that I "MUST" come out, it's just an overwhelming feeling that I want to stop living a lie and tip-toeing around them. I'm not to worried about being disowned or financially cut off, my parents are very loving and I just think they deserve the truth :/


Then it sounds like you don't need to make it an 'event', just let it occur in conversation, in context.
i agree and I would wait at least until after you've moved out. With some distance from them, you might change your mind and decide it's not that important and wait even longer or not....

Wind's in the east, a mist coming in
Like something is brewing and about to begin
Can't put my finger on what lies in store
but I feel what's to happen has happened before...


Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
17-01-2013, 10:36 PM
RE: Finally coming out
Thanks all! You've given me a lot to consider Smile
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
17-01-2013, 11:12 PM
RE: Finally coming out
You are the final judge though - after all, you know them best.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes morondog's post
18-01-2013, 01:39 AM
RE: Finally coming out
Based solely on the information you have provided, I'm going to second Chas' recommendation. Don't make it an event, just let them know when it comes up organically. When they ask you why you aren't going to church, or at prayer time, or if they begin to question you're non-religious behaviour. Ultimately though it's something in which you are the best judge, so take all in to consideration and act accordingly. Good luck no matter what you choose, let us know what you decide and the consequences of your actions.

Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
04-02-2013, 11:38 PM (This post was last modified: 04-02-2013 11:44 PM by WeAreTheCosmos.)
RE: Finally coming out
When questioned by my mother, I said something like the following:

"I didn't have a choice here. I can't FORCE myself to believe something. Without evidence or a decent shred of probability, my mind just wont accept something as true. However, consider this: If god does exist, and he is truly omniscient, then he KNOWS that it is IMPOSSIBLE for me to force belief in him. I will live my life as best as I can, and remain a morally 'good' person. I will do my best to support universal human rights through logic and reason. I shall not kill, or steal... But neither will I force a woman to be in silence, or any of the other silly things that are commanded in the bible. I will see the world the only way I can, through my own eyes. And someday, when I die, if those eyes should see god... In his omniscience, he will already understand that I was simply not given enough proof, but lived a moral life, helped others, and did as little harm as possible, where possible, taking responsibility for my actions when I did make mistakes. And KNOWING my mind, he would have no choice but to forgive. And if he is so morally corrupt that he denies forgiveness to a good man, then he is no god I would ever want to follow."

^ Paraphrased, and I had prepared ahead of time. I wanted my parents to know that its actually IMPOSSIBLE to make myself believe something, but I didn't want them to worry that I wouldn't get into the afterlife club, or that I was going to live like an azzhole.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
22-02-2013, 02:51 PM
RE: Finally coming out
I just told my parents I'm an Atheist this year. I've been an Atheist twice.
The first time I was an Atheist was Sophomore year. We were going through some financial diffuculties and that's why I think my mom really lashed out at me the first time I told her. I ran up to my room crying.
My dad tried to connect me with some church people to talk to. I came back to Christianity again, then this year my Senior year I told my mother I was an Atheist.
She reacted more kindly than she did the last time. What I will say is your parents are probably not going to like the news when they first hear it, but after time they will grow to accept it.
My advice is to tell your parents the truth, but try not to talk much about your beliefs to avoid conflict. You can give them a few reasons at first why you're an Atheist but don't throw every reason in your parents face. Religion can become a pretty controversal subject.

" If you're brave enough to say goodbye, life will reward you with a new hello" Paulo Coelho
"If you pray for rain it eventually does fall. If you pray for floodwaters to abate, they eventually do. The same happens in the absence of prayers" Steve Allen
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
Post Reply
Forum Jump: