Friend keeps inviting me to church events?
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25-05-2014, 08:27 AM
Friend keeps inviting me to church events?
Hi, I'm 17 and an atheist. My parents and friends at school all know, but I am in boy scouts and my friends there do not know. A good friend of mine keeps inviting me to events at our church. I am not sure how he would respond to me being atheist. Boy Scouts also does not allow atheists. My friend usually invites me through emails, but he also asks me in person. What should I say next time? Should I tell him I am an atheist or should I always claim to be too busy?
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25-05-2014, 08:32 AM
RE: Friend keeps inviting me to church events?
Until you are ready for this person and others to know, just be really busy.

See here they are the bruises some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF

We're all mad here. The Cheshire Cat

Are my Chakras on straight?
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25-05-2014, 09:38 AM
RE: Friend keeps inviting me to church events?
If they're events like a picnic or something, I might consider going. If they're praise Jesus rallies, maybe not. It's all about your level of comfort and/or curiosity. Are you at all interested in these events? If they're just social things it might not be so bad and if you attend one it might make you feel better about always saying no to a friend (if he's a good friend). Otherwise just find something else to be busy with... or get new friends Big Grin

Atheism is the only way to truly be free from sin.
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25-05-2014, 09:50 AM
RE: Friend keeps inviting me to church events?
To be honest, my advice would be leave the Boyscouts.
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25-05-2014, 09:55 AM
RE: Friend keeps inviting me to church events?
I wouldn't be tolerant of the Boyscouts if they can't be toward you. Get out of that mess, and join something that fits you.

A wise person makes their own decisions; an ignorant one follows public opinion.
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25-05-2014, 10:16 AM
RE: Friend keeps inviting me to church events?
(25-05-2014 09:38 AM)Colourcraze Wrote:  If they're events like a picnic or something, I might consider going. If they're praise Jesus rallies, maybe not. It's all about your level of comfort and/or curiosity. Are you at all interested in these events? If they're just social things it might not be so bad and if you attend one it might make you feel better about always saying no to a friend (if he's a good friend). Otherwise just find something else to be busy with... ---

^^Yes^^ that. If you do attend one and decide it's just not your thing, tell your friend just that, "It's not really my thing." If he wants further explanation... just say you aren't into "churchy" things and really never have been.

You're ok with him the way he is and you are ok with you; if he wants your friendship, he will want to be ok with you, too. Friendship is being cool with the friend... doesn't mean ya gotta think their cult is cool, too. Wink

A new type of thinking is essential if mankind is to survive and move to higher levels. ~ Albert Einstein
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25-05-2014, 10:46 AM
RE: Friend keeps inviting me to church events?
On thinking more about this, the others may be right. Enjoy the social part of it with the things you may enjoy or feel comfortable with. My son used to go to some weekly meetings with the neighbor kids at their church, mostly because they went to hockey games and things like that. He didn't attend services with them though.

He went to a Christian rock concert with another friend and enjoyed the concert experience but was freaked out when the friend talked him into a tent revival.

Though I would still be busy if the event seems like it would make you uncomfortable.

See here they are the bruises some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF

We're all mad here. The Cheshire Cat

Are my Chakras on straight?
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26-05-2014, 07:40 PM
RE: Friend keeps inviting me to church events?
You have prior commitments. You don't have to elaborate.
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27-05-2014, 06:12 AM
RE: Friend keeps inviting me to church events?
Ya know what? I totally get what you're saying. Being an atheist in a friend group that keeps asking you to go to their Christian events is one of the most stressful things to have to deal with as a teenager. Hiding yourself is, in my opinion, not the best course of action. I spent the last year at a Mennonite residence, and hiding my atheism from everyone there precipitated a drop into depression for me.

However strongly you feel like you want to be part of the Boy Scouts, in the end, you don't need them. The Boy Scouts are probably not something you will be involved with later in life. Leaving them now, I know it's going to be difficult, but I promise you it will get better. And later in life, you can look back and laugh. I mean, you were the incognito atheist! Living among the wild Boy Scouts! Tongue

Here's my advice- either leave the Boy Scouts, or tell them who you really are. Don't do what I did. Be honest. Anyway, it seems like the Boy Scouts are becoming much more open! Just look at their recent policy changes for gay members! And if they don't accept you, well, then you don't need them. But ya know what? You don't have to do anything for now. Maybe actually go to a few of these events, really confuse your friends! Big Grin

Because remember the golden rule: Christian event = free food.
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