Fuck My Religious Upbringing
Post Reply
 
Thread Rating:
  • 0 Votes - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
07-12-2017, 11:58 AM
Fuck My Religious Upbringing
Anyone else here have a hard time owning the good things they do for other people because of the Christian indoctrination they received as a kid?

I was raised with the idea that every good thing we do, every beneficial talent we have was a result of God working through us, while every bad thing we do was our natural state of sinful dreadfulness. This has led to a lot of self esteem issues, self depreciation, anxiety and depression that I'm currently in therapy for (along with a nasty case of PPD)

I'm not a Christian anymore and I would like to be able to look at my good attributes, my natural talents and my fostered talents and say "This is all me! No god had anything to do with these good things" but there's still a catch in my head that makes it incredibly uncomfortable for me to claim and proudly display these good things about myself.

Of course I'm more than willing to say "I AM THE WORST HUMAN BEING EVER" when I fuck up, and that's where therapy has been hugely beneficial. I'd just like to get to a point where my good points and my bad points balance out in the understanding that both types make me wonderfully human. Nothing more. Nothing less.

I don't know if this post warrants response. I just know I needed to vent Smile

If you weep at the loss of the sun, then your tears will prevent you from seeing the stars.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 10 users Like Miscellaniac's post
07-12-2017, 12:05 PM
RE: Fuck My Religious Upbringing
(07-12-2017 11:58 AM)Miscellaniac Wrote:  I don't know if this post warrants response. I just know I needed to vent Smile

You make several good points.

Christianity does tend to load us up with guilt for not doing more than we reasonably (or even possibly) can. Pride is considered a failing, but it isn't necessarily. Some pride is unreasonable and can lead to problems. But some pride is entirely honest, reasonable, and necessary for positive self-esteem.

I also have a problem with those who thank God but don't bother to thank the people who were really responsible for their benefits.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 7 users Like Thoreauvian's post
07-12-2017, 12:32 PM
RE: Fuck My Religious Upbringing
(07-12-2017 11:58 AM)Miscellaniac Wrote:  Anyone else here have a hard time owning the good things they do for other people because of the Christian indoctrination they received as a kid?

I was raised with the idea that every good thing we do, every beneficial talent we have was a result of God working through us, while every bad thing we do was our natural state of sinful dreadfulness. This has led to a lot of self esteem issues, self depreciation, anxiety and depression that I'm currently in therapy for (along with a nasty case of PPD)

I'm not a Christian anymore and I would like to be able to look at my good attributes, my natural talents and my fostered talents and say "This is all me! No god had anything to do with these good things" but there's still a catch in my head that makes it incredibly uncomfortable for me to claim and proudly display these good things about myself.

Of course I'm more than willing to say "I AM THE WORST HUMAN BEING EVER" when I fuck up, and that's where therapy has been hugely beneficial. I'd just like to get to a point where my good points and my bad points balance out in the understanding that both types make me wonderfully human. Nothing more. Nothing less.

I don't know if this post warrants response. I just know I needed to vent Smile

Not to sound like Yoda but balanced you will be, it just will take some time! Big Grin

" Generally speaking, the errors in religion are dangerous; those in philosophy only ridiculous."
David Hume
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
07-12-2017, 12:43 PM
RE: Fuck My Religious Upbringing
FWIW, that’s a big reason I quit AA. If you drink they say you didn’t pray enough and if you’re sober it’s all because God did what you couldn’t do alone. I got sick of the dirty looks when I said that I was sober because I found the fortitude to resist the urge to drink. I’m proud of it so fuck them. And if I fuck it up, it’s on me.

So yeah. When you’re shitty it’s on you but hey when you’re good it’s yours too. Fair is fair. If you’re a good person thank yourself. If you’re not, blame yourself and work on it.

Or consult an imaginary space ghost.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 4 users Like I'mFred's post
07-12-2017, 02:05 PM
RE: Fuck My Religious Upbringing
It gets me most when I'm enjoying something. I got programmed early on that I had no business taking pleasure in anything but god's wonderful grace towards the horrid excrescence that was me.

You'll probably get better as time passes at identifying and opposing the destructive assumptions that are trying to suck the fun out of your life.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 2 users Like julep's post
07-12-2017, 02:25 PM
RE: Fuck My Religious Upbringing
I still recall dozens of times that I found myself crying in guilt at an alter, or in prayer, or in group accountability settings. The guilt complex that religion builds and breeds in exceptionally effective at controlling people. Especially those who already have a level of self-loathing, or who are weakened by other issues they are dealing with emotionally. And it's a fucking tough nut to crack when you're trying to break out of the bonds of religion.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes Emma's post
07-12-2017, 02:35 PM
RE: Fuck My Religious Upbringing
Yeah that's the general problem with this whole "born a sinner" mindset right? The only things you "own" are your decisions to misbehave or to not live up to god's plan or purpose for you! Anything you do especially well is either the result of a god-given talent or just god using you as a vessel for his plan.

I think this is a pernicious and sinister way to teach people to think about themselves; it sort of levels the playing field at an easily-attainable mediocrity right? Anything you're good at isn't really you doing it, so if you're pleased with yourself for some kind of achievement that's just sinful pride. Ergo - the virtuoso guitarist or well-practiced and skilled brain surgeon should have no status or recognition (other than the implementation of his faith!) above the person who meanders haplessly through life never exercising the discipline required to learn a real skill or develop an aptitude for anything of any particular use to his fellow man. The end result is that no sinner has to contend with the idea that someone else is "better" than him - only "worse" when he gives into sin or some other perceived wickedness.

It's all bullocks designed to (among other things) reward obedience and venerate mediocrity, and it's the exact WRONG attitude that human beings should have if we're ever going to save ourselves from ourselves as a society.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 3 users Like Mr. Boston's post
07-12-2017, 03:20 PM
RE: Fuck My Religious Upbringing
As an outsider who was never indoctrinated into christianity I think the most disgusting aspect of this religion is the concept of sin and guilt. From birth it's pounded into the heads of children that they're miserable sinners who are in debt to god for something an ancester did. Furthermore, the only antedote, the only way out of the situation is to accept Jebus. At that point you're supposed to be ohh so greatful for Jesus because he's saved you from your sin.

It's akin to someone having a nice swim in a lake but someone comes along and keeps pushing them under the water time and time again until they're just on the brink of drowning and finally the person pushing them under hands them a life vest and then the swimmer is required to be thankful for being saved. It a sets up a scenario that relies on demoralizing another human being from birth until they're grateful for anything that releases them from the mental pain, even if that means being accepting by an imaginary god.

If Jesus was all about love and peace and inclusion it wouldn't be such a bad religion... but it's not. It's all about control and power. It's a sick, disgusting, vile religion.

Shakespeare's Comedy of Errors.... on Donald J. Trump:

He is deformed, crooked, old, and sere,
Ill-fac’d, worse bodied, shapeless every where;
Vicious, ungentle, foolish, blunt, unkind,
Stigmatical in making, worse in mind.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 5 users Like dancefortwo's post
11-12-2017, 10:27 AM
RE: Fuck My Religious Upbringing
"You've made this day a special day, by just your being you. There's no person in the whole world like you and I like you just the way you are." Fred Rogers (Mr. Rogers)
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 3 users Like Toney's post
13-12-2017, 12:00 PM
RE: Fuck My Religious Upbringing
(11-12-2017 10:27 AM)Toney Wrote:  "You've made this day a special day, by just your being you. There's no person in the whole world like you and I like you just the way you are." Fred Rogers (Mr. Rogers)

Fred Rogers: a better Christian than God Tongue

This is just something I've been going over in therapy and I think maybe, just maybe, I'm beginning to be okay with the entirety of myself without any religious connotation or attachment and it feels nice.

If you weep at the loss of the sun, then your tears will prevent you from seeing the stars.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes Miscellaniac's post
Post Reply
Forum Jump: