Fucked up situation
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21-06-2016, 05:27 PM
RE: Fucked up situation
I have been away. I checked the threads and saw this from you and thought I'd better look right away.

I have no words for this situation really. Other than I am so sorry you are going through this. Not only you, your family.

I am glad that the Greek family is usually close knit and supportive and I hope that is what is taking place.

Very sad to learn the young one learned through facebook. Fucking facebook!

Car accidents are so sudden. A mate lost his brother recently. Just like that. Now this.

I want something from you. I want you to eat properly, keep up your strength up, try to sleep. Your mum needs you to be strong for her.

Can you do this for me?

I know it's hard. I can barely eat myself. I have to force myself to do so.

There are also things that are beyond your control. How your mother will feel as time goes by. This is her matter. You cannot fix it. You simply have to be supportive. There's nothing else to be done. Will she feel guilty? It is likely so.

As for your loss, I am so very sorry. Time will pass, things will become easier. This offers no consolation now of course.

I wish I were there to offer you a hug in this stressful time. The internet is so limiting. However I and others are here. Vent, cry, whatever. Just be sure there is a community who cares for you deeply. Myself included.

With great sadness. Dale.

NOTE: Member, Tomasia uses this site to slander other individuals. He then later proclaims it a joke, but not in public.
I will call him a liar and a dog here and now.
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21-06-2016, 05:32 PM (This post was last modified: 21-06-2016 07:11 PM by Heatheness.)
RE: Fucked up situation
I'm going to be practical here: Do NOT let her admit that it's her fault to the police or the insurance company.

I don't know about Greece but in America if she admits it's her fault to either the police or the insurance company, she can be charged with vehicular manslaughter. It may be different there but get advice from a good lawyer first.

Do NOT let her talk to the police or the insurance company (not even her own) without her lawyer present. I could not be more serious.

Let me add to this:

I am about taking responsibility, when you're not under duress of illness/injury, fatigue, drugs or grief. Until she's well and with the assistance of her legal representative she can do that. However, she's ill, on drugs and grieving and in no shape to make a informed, considered or well thought out statement.

I probably should've added that in the beginning. People have been known to be coerced into statements even when they aren't in her condition and while she may rightly want to take responsibility, she also needs to be in a position of knowing what she's doing and saying.

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22-06-2016, 10:43 AM
RE: Fucked up situation
So, the funeral was today. The worst is over. My mum is getting better and better, both physically and (apparently) psychologically. She was upset about not being able to get out of the hospital to go to the funeral and see her, but she handled that well too.

She still hasn't blamed herself for what happened to my aunt, she doesn't remember what happened clearly but she says she thinks she did something wrong. She just said that this will stay with her forever, but still no signs of guilt. She can think more clearly now, she realizes she can't grieve properly right now and that she needs to be patient until she gets better. She's also determined to quit smoking, which is awesome. She won't be allowed to smoke for days, so it will be easier for her now I guess.

My dad is driving to the place the accident happened today. He's hoping to understand what went wrong, knowing that my mum is a very good driver and extra careful since an older, less serious accident she had. The road was new and since the accident I've been told by three different sources that it's dangerous (and it's hardly been two weeks since it was opened). I'm kinda anxious to see what he says when he comes back.

I'm still worried about the fact that my little sister who is still in New York hasn't been told about it. That's gonna be pretty hard as well.

As for me, my appetite is back, but because of the stress these last few days my stomach won't accept the same amount of food it used to. I can say I'm eating quite well now though. Sleep is still an issue, after only a few hours of sleep at night and a whole tiring day I feel exhausted, but I'm too tense and cannot fall asleep. This is basically why I'm here writing this, I was trying to sleep but I can't. It's 7pm, so it's not a big deal. I hope I'll be able to get some rest at night now that the funeral is over and we can get past that.

And Heatheness, I hadn't thought about that much. I'm not sure how the law works in such cases here in Greece, but I'll definitely mention it to my dad. All I know is that the cops got a statement from my mum at the scene (which is what they usually do in such cases), asking her if she ran a red light (as the other driver claimed she had) to which she replied "no".

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22-06-2016, 10:58 AM (This post was last modified: 22-06-2016 11:04 AM by JDog554.)
RE: Fucked up situation
(22-06-2016 10:43 AM)undergroundp Wrote:  So, the funeral was today. The worst is over. My mum is getting better and better, both physically and (apparently) psychologically. She was upset about not being able to get out of the hospital to go to the funeral and see her, but she handled that well too.

She still hasn't blamed herself for what happened to my aunt, she doesn't remember what happened clearly but she says she thinks she did something wrong. She just said that this will stay with her forever, but still no signs of guilt. She can think more clearly now, she realizes she can't grieve properly right now and that she needs to be patient until she gets better. She's also determined to quit smoking, which is awesome. She won't be allowed to smoke for days, so it will be easier for her now I guess.

My dad is driving to the place the accident happened today. He's hoping to understand what went wrong, knowing that my mum is a very good driver and extra careful since an older, less serious accident she had. The road was new and since the accident I've been told by three different sources that it's dangerous (and it's hardly been two weeks since it was opened). I'm kinda anxious to see what he says when he comes back.

I'm still worried about the fact that my little sister who is still in New York hasn't been told about it. That's gonna be pretty hard as well.

As for me, my appetite is back, but because of the stress these last few days my stomach won't accept the same amount of food it used to. I can say I'm eating quite well now though. Sleep is still an issue, after only a few hours of sleep at night and a whole tiring day I feel exhausted, but I'm too tense and cannot fall asleep. This is basically why I'm here writing this, I was trying to sleep but I can't. It's 7pm, so it's not a big deal. I hope I'll be able to get some rest at night now that the funeral is over and we can get past that.

And Heatheness, I hadn't thought about that much. I'm not sure how the law works in such cases here in Greece, but I'll definitely mention it to my dad. All I know is that the cops got a statement from my mum at the scene (which is what they usually do in such cases), asking her if she ran a red light (as the other driver claimed she had) to which she replied "no".

Glad to hear you and your mother are improving. It's not easy coming back from something like that so the little steps you are making are a big deal.

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22-06-2016, 11:34 AM
RE: Fucked up situation
My heart goes out to you Underground. Wish I could do more.

Don't Live each day like it's your last. Live each day like you have 541 days after that one where every choice you make will have lasting implications to you and the world around you. ~ Tim Minchin
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22-06-2016, 11:44 AM
RE: Fucked up situation
I'm glad to hear things are getting "slightly better" considering the situation. I'm also happy for your mom's determination about quitting smoking. I wish her a full recovery and your family an emotional one.

A tight Hug for you.

孤独 - The Out Crowd
Life is a flash of light between two eternities of darkness.
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22-06-2016, 05:41 PM
RE: Fucked up situation
UGP - you have been on my mind today. I am glad to hear that you and your mom are doing a little better. It's going to take time to adjust to everything that has changed in your family. Sending more hugs your way.

See here they are the bruises some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF

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22-06-2016, 05:52 PM
RE: Fucked up situation
I too am thinking of you and am happy to know things are easing.

Dale Heart

NOTE: Member, Tomasia uses this site to slander other individuals. He then later proclaims it a joke, but not in public.
I will call him a liar and a dog here and now.
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23-06-2016, 12:03 PM
RE: Fucked up situation
I'm so very for your loss Sad.

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23-06-2016, 01:20 PM
RE: Fucked up situation
Hugs to you, P. I'm glad to hear your mom is doing better and seems to have her priorities straight.
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