Funny comments by theist in your life
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24-07-2010, 03:56 PM
 
RE: Funny comments by theist in your life
I'm a soldier in the Army Reserves. During our annual training a couple summers ago, the chaplain's assistant was going around inviting soldiers to a chapel service. When she invited me, I declined. When asked why, I explained that I was an Atheist and that I don't go to religious services. She looked really confused for a moment.
"Does that make you a Scientologist," she asked. I just shook my head and walked away. I spoke to the chaplain about it later, and he was amused. Apparently he spoke to her about it later, because she apologized for calling me a Scientologist. She still didn't get the idea, though, as she then informed me that the chaplain would be more than happy to create an Atheist service for me.
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25-07-2010, 04:29 PM
 
RE: Funny comments by theist in your life
How can you create an atheist religious service? I want to know what the Chaplin thinks that would look like.

I was talking to my friend yesterday and she said "You have faith that God is not real, just like I have faith he is real." Ugh no, I am well aware that "God" is as socially constructed as the thousands of "Gods" she does not believe in them. There is no faith involved.
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26-07-2010, 12:20 AM
RE: Funny comments by theist in your life
Where I live, we have a lot of Mormons and Catholics, and a lot of them are at odds with each other. I over-heard a Catholic boy talking about how nonsensical Mormonism is. About how Mormonism makes no sense what so ever, but Catholicism, that makes sense. I felt like pointing out that both Mormon and Catholics believe that God created everything flawed, so he had to impregnate a woman with himself so that he could be his own father, and sacrifice himself to himself so that his father, who is also himself, will forever man for being created flaw by himself. And because of this, they both worship an invisible zombie in the sky. Amen.

I suppose it doesn't seem odd to them, but the hypocrisy was over-whelming to me.

I don't believe Jesus is the son of God until I see the long form birth certificate!
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26-07-2010, 12:36 PM
 
RE: Funny comments by theist in your life
my bosses wife tried to convert over the phone once. she told me as long as i believe jesus died for my sins i would be welcomed into heaven. then she spent at least 10 minutes trying to convince me to say it out loud to her. this is a woman that believes it's a sin for women to wear pants. but isn't it more of a sin to have easy access?
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26-07-2010, 02:11 PM
RE: Funny comments by theist in your life
(25-07-2010 04:29 PM)purplesummer Wrote:  How can you create an atheist religious service?

You might ask this little fella, he might know...

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26-07-2010, 02:27 PM
RE: Funny comments by theist in your life
Lol that was a good South Park episode. Anyway I am surprised at how popular this thread is. I mean I created it a while ago. Thanks everyone I like the comments.
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26-07-2010, 03:25 PM
RE: Funny comments by theist in your life
I had a good one today. I was talking to someone from somewhere in the states today, and the conversation led me to tell them I am an atheist. They replied, "is that somewhere in Europe?" After I got control of my laughter I explained that it meant I don't believe in god, and the woman told me in a very condescending tone, "it's pronounced 'heathen' my dear." I've never laughed so hard in my life.

So many cats, so few good recipes.
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29-07-2010, 08:25 AM
 
RE: Funny comments by theist in your life
i just had a woman tell me she believed in the power of the ouija board and used the fictional movie "white noise" as a source of her beliefs. she also swore up and down that she's an atheist just because, per the definition, she doesn't believe in a god. but a game, she believes in that. crack pots are everywhere.
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31-07-2010, 10:50 PM
 
RE: Funny comments by theist in your life
We were watching the news and the story where the guy who fell into the sink hole came up. After we heard that he was saved by a man that was there, my sister said thank God for saving that man. I told her that it was the other man that saved the guy and not God. Then she said that God placed that man there to save him. I then asked her what about that little girls body that was found earlier. She said that the family most not have prayed hard enough or it was just her time to go. I am still amazed by the simple minded answers people can give without hearing how wrong it sounds.
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01-08-2010, 02:30 AM
 
RE: Funny comments by theist in your life
(13-07-2010 03:03 PM)xxxsaltyxxx Wrote:  A friend of mine was trying to convince me there was a god, by telling me to look at some scenery and sunsets, or something stupid like that. When I said that if she was going to use beauty as an acceptance of god, she also needs to accept the ugliness in the world that he let's happen, i.e. all the suffering. Her respose was, "God has to let there be suffering, because without suffering, there can't be compassion." Correct me if I'm wrong, but wouldn't that be a good thing? Would you miss compassion if the only thing it's for no longer exists? I asked her that, but didn't get a response, so will anyone else answer that for me? Big Grin

hi everyone. just joined up.

in response to things like this said to me, my one and only response (almost an end all bitch slap to Monotheism) is this:

Evil exists, do we agree? (of course they agree)
Since evil exists, one of these three things must be true, without question:

1) God does not have the power to stop evil, so he is not omnipotent and not truly God

2) God does not see the evil happening, so is not omniscient and not truly God

3) God does not wish to stop the evil, so he is himself at least partially evil.

If He were real, I'd still choose not worship a god like this.

many clever christians may try to dispute the third point with something like "He leaves evil in the world to test our faith."

Bullshit. The bible and Jesus himself teach that evil, sin, and violence are not justified no matter the circumstance. If God uses evil as a teaching/testing tool for humans, then he is the biggest kind of hypocrite
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