Poll: Which version of this event do you believe?
The Official Version
The Conspiracy Version
Neither
[Show Results]
 
Generic conspiracy theory humor
Post Reply
 
Thread Rating:
  • 0 Votes - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
25-10-2012, 01:13 AM
Generic conspiracy theory humor
Rules: In pointy brackets, place <a generic version of what you would say> at this point in the conversation. Wild cards only. Shoot for the lols. I'll start.

==============================

<Recollection of well-known news event>

<Accusation that "official" version of event is inaccurate.>

<Assertion of malice by Shadowy Agency, possibly The Government, in putting forth alleged inaccuracies.>

<Assertion of The Truth of said event>

<Accusation that Shadowy Agency has covered up The Truth, and largely succeeded, save for fragmentary evidence not provided.>

<Demand that audience of this post opens its eyes and gets angry.>

Warning Labels: Long-winded. Twisted sense of humor (including puns, literalisms, absurdisms, all complicated by sarcasm and deadpan delivery). Contrarian. Do not combine with high quantities of sugar, acid (corrosive or hallucinogenic), or people who take themselves too seriously.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 3 users Like Reltzik's post
25-10-2012, 06:32 AM
RE: Generic conspiracy theory humor
I don't get it Confused

[Image: sigvacachica.png]
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
25-10-2012, 06:37 AM
RE: Generic conspiracy theory humor
I'm with Nach_in.
Are you referring to something happening on another thread? If so, please give us a link.

Cheers.

Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
25-10-2012, 07:10 AM
RE: Generic conspiracy theory humor
(25-10-2012 01:13 AM)Reltzik Wrote:  Rules: In pointy brackets, place <a generic version of what you would say> at this point in the conversation. Wild cards only. Shoot for the lols. I'll start.

==============================

<Recollection of well-known news event>

<Accusation that "official" version of event is inaccurate.>

<Assertion of malice by Shadowy Agency, possibly The Government, in putting forth alleged inaccuracies.>

<Assertion of The Truth of said event>

<Accusation that Shadowy Agency has covered up The Truth, and largely succeeded, save for fragmentary evidence not provided.>

<Demand that audience of this post opens its eyes and gets angry.>

<Spew invective at most recent denier>

Skepticism is not a position; it is an approach to claims.
Science is not a subject, but a method.
[Image: flagstiny%206.gif]
Visit this user's website Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes Chas's post
25-10-2012, 08:38 AM (This post was last modified: 25-10-2012 08:41 AM by Reltzik.)
RE: Generic conspiracy theory humor
<Assurance that it all makes sense if you just look at it closely and stop believing the Shadowy Agency.>

<Liberal usage of the word "sheeple".>

(25-10-2012 06:32 AM)nach_in Wrote:  I don't get it Confused

Seriously, no actual event. Just a parody of conspiracy discussion threads. Think of it like a reverse mad-libs. Instead of filling in the category with something, you are taking what would normally be said, like "Homeland Security killed Kennedy with a third gunman!!!", and replacing it with a generic category, like <Assertion of thesis, supported entirely by ! marks>.

Warning Labels: Long-winded. Twisted sense of humor (including puns, literalisms, absurdisms, all complicated by sarcasm and deadpan delivery). Contrarian. Do not combine with high quantities of sugar, acid (corrosive or hallucinogenic), or people who take themselves too seriously.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
25-10-2012, 08:57 AM
Generic conspiracy theory humor
<Create an account that gets banned for spamming when warned not to>

<Create sock puppet accounts and name them things like Bishadi, ArcticSage, I&I, The Theist, mysticjbird, or even Bemore>

"All that is necessary for the triumph of Calvinism is that good Atheists do nothing." ~Eric Oh My
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
25-10-2012, 09:44 PM
RE: Generic conspiracy theory humor
<Accuse the poster of being a previous Conspiracy poster in disguise>

<Assert neither assumption is truthful since it's all asinine assumptions>

<Be accused of placating The Jesus lovers>

<Get furious anger bursts all posts are turned into general assumptions>

<Begin to see the absurd, and troll the postsEvil_monster>

"Love is hot, Truth is molten!"
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
25-10-2012, 09:58 PM
Generic conspiracy theory humor
<Start small by asking innocuous seeming questions. Did you know the US supported the mujahideen during the soviet occupation. >

<Once a sucker is hooked find a website that says George Bush paid the Taliban to attack America. >

<When you meet resistance, call naysayers good patriotic Americans who only watch Fox News and are deceived by the lies of the shadow government.>

<Include a quote from Eisenhower about the Industrial Military Complex.>

<Remind everyone that the CIA set up Margaret Thatcher to power. Point out if the Falklands had not been taken, the soviets would've placed missiles in Jamaica. >

<Be sure to reiterate ad nauseaum the mainstream media is tricking us to believe whatever they show us. >

<If it hasn't been done in the past three comments, be sure to blame the US for everything bad that has ever happened in the world, going back to the first crusades>

<End every rant with: Soylent Green! It's people! It's people.......>

"All that is necessary for the triumph of Calvinism is that good Atheists do nothing." ~Eric Oh My
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
26-10-2012, 09:48 AM
RE: Generic conspiracy theory humor
<Provide links to pictorial evidence, and breezily assert that it proves the thesis beyond any reasonable doubt.>

<Accuse remaining doubters of being unreasonable.>

Warning Labels: Long-winded. Twisted sense of humor (including puns, literalisms, absurdisms, all complicated by sarcasm and deadpan delivery). Contrarian. Do not combine with high quantities of sugar, acid (corrosive or hallucinogenic), or people who take themselves too seriously.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
26-10-2012, 09:57 AM
Generic conspiracy theory humor
(26-10-2012 09:48 AM)Reltzik Wrote:  <Provide links to pictorial evidence, and breezily assert that it proves the thesis beyond any reasonable doubt.>

<Accuse remaining doubters of being unreasonable.>

<That link proves there really IS a conspiracy!>

"All that is necessary for the triumph of Calvinism is that good Atheists do nothing." ~Eric Oh My
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
Post Reply

Possibly Related Threads...
Thread: Author Replies: Views: Last Post
  Conspiracy theories that have come true. Metazoa Zeke 20 405 30-06-2014 12:58 PM
Last Post: dancefortwo
  Church conspiracy theories. BlackMason 4 152 04-05-2014 11:44 AM
Last Post: BlackMason
  What the hell is wrong with Bill Maher? (Germ Theory Denialism) Paleo 30 5,635 28-04-2014 02:35 PM
Last Post: Minimalist
  MH 370 Conspiracy Theories Carlo_The_Bugsmasher_Driver 9 586 24-04-2014 11:26 PM
Last Post: Drunkin Druid
  Found a bat shit crazy conspiracy theory website ... TheLogicalAthiest 6 254 24-03-2014 04:38 PM
Last Post: Chas
  What's the craziest conspiracy theory you can come up with? Tartarus Sauce 85 2,681 17-03-2014 10:28 AM
Last Post: Just Another Atheist
  Conspiracy Theory With Jesse Ventura Punk Pumpkin 18 496 09-03-2014 09:36 AM
Last Post: Revenant77x
Forum Jump: