Getting Medical Boarded out of the Military
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30-05-2015, 04:24 PM
RE: Getting Medical Boarded out of the Military
(30-05-2015 10:23 AM)Thumpalumpacus Wrote:  I think it'd be a good idea to force yourself to open up to the therapist -- preferably a non-military therapist -- before you try to do so with your wife. You're right, some of your feelings may well scare the hell out of her, and you'll need to practice talking about them so that you can do so in a way that is both heartfelt and controlled in order for her to understand without being shocked or frightened.

One veteran to another, thank you for your service, and I hope you find your peace and balance again.

Yeah that's my next move. I've tried military docs...no help whatsoever.
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30-05-2015, 04:28 PM
RE: Getting Medical Boarded out of the Military
(30-05-2015 12:02 PM)yakherder Wrote:  I'm one of those people who thrive in the military. Even after moving to Canada, I still stayed in the National Guard and drive back across the border each month. In the civilian world I feel like I have to put on a mask, and it's psychologically draining. Everything I've ever told my girlfriend I've come to regret telling her. She's okay with the facts. What bothers her is the idea that I was in fact never forced or coerced into doing anything. I'm a predator, by choice, and was long before the military got to me, so to speak. That once a month where I get to go play weekend warrior is my time to relax and take off the mask for a couple days, and if I had it all to do over again, I'd probably have stayed active duty and not went off to raise a family and live the normal life. Everything about civilian life seems fake in a way. A bunch of naive people living in a bubble without realizing it. So although my situation is somewhat different than yours, I can sympathize.

The best advice I can give is that you're right in not opening up to close family. They won't understand. Even with the best of intentions, they're not capable of understanding because they haven't seem the world through your eyes.

Find people who specialize in PTSD, seek out veterans in similar circumstances who might be more sympathetic than your former comrades, and put on a mask for everyone else.

Most importantly, establish new goals and set off to achieve them. Get your mind on something else to distract you from the past. Keep yourself busy.

Wow this is scary how much you hit the nail on the head. The biggest part being about putting on a mask. I hate it so much and sometimes I'm bad about holding it in. I feel the same way about being a predator except I wasn't one before the military. It's one of the things I sort of picked up and was rather good at it which scares me in a way.
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30-05-2015, 04:30 PM
RE: Getting Medical Boarded out of the Military
(30-05-2015 01:46 PM)onlinebiker Wrote:  Not all wounds require a wheelchair, a prosthesis or even a fucking bandaid....

It doesn't make them any less painful.

Best bet -- guys who've been through the same. Very best bet -- the guys who've been through the same, and gotten better.

Some guys never do get better -- and I suspect that they on some level like being fucked up -- sort of a Munchausen syndrome kind of thing. Of course - they probably weren't really all that bad off to start with..... They just bitch and moan a lot and enjoy the attention.

It sure doesn't seem that way for you -- you're almost going the other way - and not talking about it.

You're right -- venting helps....

Vent with vets who understand....

Thanks I really appreciate it. I know a few of those type always talking about being deployed. Every sentence starts with back in Afghanistan/irag/iran yada yada yada.
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31-05-2015, 12:50 AM
RE: Getting Medical Boarded out of the Military
(30-05-2015 04:23 PM)MrKrispy601 Wrote:  The problem was I got switched between four different therapist due to rotations and such.


See, that's some right bullshit. They wouldn't rotate someone who had a broken femur or was recovering from a heart attack.

They pay a hell of a lot of lip service to treating PTSD as another combat injury, but the fact is that they won't and probably cannot, because that badge ain't red.

All the more reason to find a therapist on the outside, and make sure he's one who is willing to do sessions on Skype or ano
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01-06-2015, 10:46 AM
RE: Getting Medical Boarded out of the Military
Been there. Done that.

For years I chose not to talk about any of what I saw/seen/did. It was emotionally draining. Talk to people who understand and actually give a shit. Finding those people is the hard part. The military talks a lot about PTSD, when in reality they little to nothing about treating it.

You always have this forum whenever needed.
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01-06-2015, 08:28 PM
RE: Getting Medical Boarded out of the Military
(30-05-2015 09:38 AM)MrKrispy601 Wrote:  So I finally got the nod from the surgeon general on our base to move forward with the process to get med boarded out of the military. I have only a little longer on my enlistment anyway and since I was not going to re-up this time around it makes no difference except that I can receive more benefits. Now the reason I am being med boarded out is the reason I chose to post today- PTSD.

Now I've been dealing with this since August of 2013 and between the nightmares and the anger issues(no real outburst I've gotten good at controlling them) its been tough. But the toughest thing of all of this is there are things I can't even tell my wife, family or even my therapist. I mean I could because there really is no legal reason why I can't but it's more that I don't want anyone knowing what I've done. More importantly I don't want my wife even more scared of me than she is sometimes. Not that I am a danger to anyone or myself but when you...... you get the point.

I think the most frustrating part of everything was the treatment I receive from my own comrades. People who you would think would understand in my chain of command treat me like I have bird flu. No one asks how I'm doing. No one ask me to come to events. Nothing. I only see them when they need me to complete some training or if it's about my med board. It's like the second you can't perform your job because of a disability you suffered from doing said job you're of no use to them. I just hate how I have given my all to something for the last 4 and a half years of my life and all I get is....this.

I dunno it just sucks. I feel as though there isn't anyone to talk to about any of this. I've tried with my family and friends but they don't really get it because none(including my military friends) have yet to deploy or are not even military. I know I have you guys here for me as well and I'm thankful for it. Just venting about it makes me feel a little better.

Hug

If you ever need to talk, you can shoot me a pm.


But as if to knock me down, reality came around
And without so much as a mere touch, cut me into little pieces

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02-06-2015, 05:14 AM
RE: Getting Medical Boarded out of the Military
(01-06-2015 08:28 PM)Momsurroundedbyboys Wrote:  
(30-05-2015 09:38 AM)MrKrispy601 Wrote:  So I finally got the nod from the surgeon general on our base to move forward with the process to get med boarded out of the military. I have only a little longer on my enlistment anyway and since I was not going to re-up this time around it makes no difference except that I can receive more benefits. Now the reason I am being med boarded out is the reason I chose to post today- PTSD.

Now I've been dealing with this since August of 2013 and between the nightmares and the anger issues(no real outburst I've gotten good at controlling them) its been tough. But the toughest thing of all of this is there are things I can't even tell my wife, family or even my therapist. I mean I could because there really is no legal reason why I can't but it's more that I don't want anyone knowing what I've done. More importantly I don't want my wife even more scared of me than she is sometimes. Not that I am a danger to anyone or myself but when you...... you get the point.

I think the most frustrating part of everything was the treatment I receive from my own comrades. People who you would think would understand in my chain of command treat me like I have bird flu. No one asks how I'm doing. No one ask me to come to events. Nothing. I only see them when they need me to complete some training or if it's about my med board. It's like the second you can't perform your job because of a disability you suffered from doing said job you're of no use to them. I just hate how I have given my all to something for the last 4 and a half years of my life and all I get is....this.

I dunno it just sucks. I feel as though there isn't anyone to talk to about any of this. I've tried with my family and friends but they don't really get it because none(including my military friends) have yet to deploy or are not even military. I know I have you guys here for me as well and I'm thankful for it. Just venting about it makes me feel a little better.

Hug

If you ever need to talk, you can shoot me a pm.

Thanks!
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