Going to visit the USA for the first time!
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01-04-2013, 11:36 PM
RE: Going to visit the USA for the first time!
Damn you sexy Flanders.
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02-04-2013, 04:41 AM
RE: Going to visit the USA for the first time!
(01-04-2013 07:31 PM)earmuffs Wrote:  Wear a bullet proof vest or you will die.

But I wanted to go to the beach! Guess I won't have to worry about bikini-lines Tongue

(01-04-2013 07:37 PM)Misanthropik Wrote:  I'm sorry. In advance. Just know that I had little to do with any of this. No

I don't understand...

(01-04-2013 08:12 PM)Full Circle Wrote:  I live just down the street and can make some recos, what are you interested in?

I have no idea. That's why I'm asking Tongue

(01-04-2013 10:56 PM)KeenIdiot Wrote:  Recommendations?
Well, locals will love your accent. You might be addressed by stereotypical views promulgated by Fox News about foreigners, don't let it get you down. Lots of us Floridians are nice folk.

Yeah, they did a hilarious piece on Amsterdam, don't know if you saw it.

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02-04-2013, 12:23 PM
RE: Going to visit the USA for the first time!
Quote:Yeah, they did a hilarious piece on Amsterdam, don't know if you saw it.
Dunno that I did, all I remember is coming to with a massive bruise on my forehead and a crack in my desk.
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02-04-2013, 12:48 PM
RE: Going to visit the USA for the first time!
Not personally familiar with the Keys but I do love the water down that way. Smile

Hmm... Consider Nov 22 to Dec. 6 ... mmyes... the homicide rate does kind of climb during and around that time of year; probably something to do with family values conflicting with actually getting together with family. Oh well, you'll probably survive. Shy

By the way, if you have an accent, people might talk loud or even yell while communicating with you. I've not been able to figure that out but you might run across it; just know they are not mad at you.

Good luck, have fun, and take lots of pics! Thumbsup

A new type of thinking is essential if mankind is to survive and move to higher levels. ~ Albert Einstein
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02-04-2013, 04:13 PM (This post was last modified: 02-04-2013 04:27 PM by Luminon.)
RE: Going to visit the USA for the first time!
Good luck and have fun in USA! Key West, Florida is one of these exceptionally exotic names that only avid fans of U.S. serials know by name. But in case you gather the courage to have a look at the rest of United States (or the Everglades or Okefenokee swamps) some of my advice might come handy.
In any case, please write down all funny or interesting things you come by. I'm not sure if I ever get to see USA, so give us some foreigner's look, will ya?

From what I know about USA...
The snakes there are more dangerous and plentiful than European viper. Watch out for overgrown hedgehogs as well. Both land and sea hedgehogs are poisonous.

Don't sleep in your car, don't park it anywhere in wilderness or parking lots to sleep, sheriffs absolutely hate this. You can't spare money that way.

Don't stare in a general direction of children for longer than 4 seconds and never stay alone in the same room with a child or a woman.

NEVER sunbathe or swim in the nude anywhere in the wilderness, hikers or drivers are 100 % sure to report you as a sex offender. If there are no hikers, squirrels (pardon, chipmunks!) will tell Smokey the Bear and he'll report you anyway.

NEVER go to a farmer's cottage asking for help with a broken car or a glass of water. Walking through 50 miles of wilderness has a higher survival rate.

Never point out the morbidly obese people's girth. The new proper politically correct word is equatoriality.

If you want to practice your Spanish for free, stay on the beach and talk to Cuban rafters. Just watch out for the escaped Guantanamo prisoners among them. Chances are, your Arabian isn't that good.


I apologize to all the offended Americans, now it's your turn to learn enough about Czech Republic to offend it properly Bowing
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02-04-2013, 04:22 PM
RE: Going to visit the USA for the first time!
(02-04-2013 04:13 PM)Luminon Wrote:  Good luck and have fun in USA! Key West, Florida is one of these exceptionally exotic names that only avid fans of U.S. serials know by name. But in case you gather the courage to have a look at the rest of United States (or the Everglades or Okefenokee swamps) some of my advice might come handy.
In any case, please write down all funny or interesting things you come by. I'm not sure if I ever get to see USA, so give us some foreigner's look, will ya?

From what I know about USA...
The snakes there are more dangerous and plentiful than European viper.

Don't sleep in your car, don't park it anywhere in wilderness or parking lots to sleep, sheriffs absolutely hate this. You can't spare money that way.

Don't stare in a general direction of children for longer than 4 seconds and never stay alone in the same room with a child or a woman.

NEVER sunbathe or swim in the nude anywhere in the wilderness, hikers or drivers are 100 % sure to report you as a sex offender. If there are no hikers, squirrels will tell Smokey the Bear and he'll report you anyway.

NEVER go to a farmer's cottage asking for help with a broken car or a glass of water. Walking through 50 miles of wilderness has a higher survival rate.

Never point out the morbidly obese people's girth. The new proper politically correct word is equatoriality.

If you want to practice your Spanish for free, stay on the beach and talk to Cuban rafters. Just watch out for the escaped Guantanamo prisoners among them. Chances are, your Arabian isn't that good.


I apologize to all the offended Americans, now it's your turn to learn enough about Czech Republic to offend it properly Bowing


That was quite a Czech list.Drinking Beverage

Skepticism is not a position; it is an approach to claims.
Science is not a subject, but a method.
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02-04-2013, 04:30 PM
RE: Going to visit the USA for the first time!
(02-04-2013 04:13 PM)Luminon Wrote:  Never point out the morbidly obese people's girth. The new proper politically correct word is equatoriality.

Oh shit, that's pretty good - I gotta remember it. I work with a guy who is equatorially challenged. Wink

A new type of thinking is essential if mankind is to survive and move to higher levels. ~ Albert Einstein
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02-04-2013, 04:32 PM
RE: Going to visit the USA for the first time!
(02-04-2013 04:22 PM)Chas Wrote:  That was quite a Czech list.Drinking Beverage

<-- Sees what you did there



...wait there's no one over there. Hold on.

^
|____ Sees what you did there.

"Ain't got no last words to say, yellow streak right up my spine. The gun in my mouth was real and the taste blew my mind."

"We see you cry. We turn your head. Then we slap your face. We see you try. We see you fail. Some things never change."
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02-04-2013, 05:11 PM
RE: Going to visit the USA for the first time!
The Florida Keys are accesible by one road, US1 also known as The Overseas Highway. Landmarks/addresses are all given by a mile marker. Key West is 0, Key Largo ends at 104.

Beaches - the south side of Key West has the beaches BUT if what you are looking for is lots of scantily clad beautiful people then South Beach on Miami Beach beats it hands down.

Nightlife - Key West has the bars on Duval Street, if your idea of having a good time is bar hopping with cruise ship passengers then this is the place for you. If dancing and discos are your scene...Miami Beach.

Wildlife - Key West has wild chickens and Fantasy Fest during Holloween, Miami Beach has wild everything year round.

Peace and Quiet - Any State Park along the Overseas Highway is good for strolling about along the shore, especially Bahia Honda State Park just south of the 7 Mile Bridge. Everglades National Park is OK for a few hours but the scenery never changes, you'll see more alligators if you take an airboat ride from the Tamiami Trail. This is the southermost route to cut across the State.

Food - Islamorada has many good restaurants, a particularly fun one is The Hungry Tarpon on mile marker 77 where you can get the best fish sandwich in the Keys, Key Lime Mango Pie and then go and hand feed the Tarpons! Not for the faint of heart, these 80-100 pound fish leap out for your hand as you dangle the bait a few inches above the water! Gotta be fast.
Another good restaurant is The Square Grouper (bales of pot that wash ahore are referred to as square groupers) is at mm 23, great food, owner/chef is wonderful.
Best eatery in KW is Louie's Backyard.

Points of interest - Key West has Mel Fishers Gold Museum from the Spanish galleon Nuestra Señora de Atocha, Hemingway's house with his six toed cats, the Audubon House and The Little White House where President Truman stayed during his presidency; all have tours and are interesting. People watching is really the main thing in Key West.
You can do a day tour out to Fort Jefferson in the Dry Tortugas on an aquacat, beautiful turquoise waters out there! Snorkeling is great.
Charter a fishing boat or go on a fishing day boat, then take your catch to a local restaurant and they'll prepare it. Remember calm seas a must!
Do a resort SCUBA course and go diving the same day.
Go parasailing, kiteboarding, paddle boarding, kayaking...
The only way to get bored here is to...well...you really can't.

BTW don't let these other guys scare you from coming, especially if your friend knows his/her way around.

You can send me a PM if you want more specifics or hyperlinks to some of these places.

FC

“I am quite sure now that often, very often, in matters concerning religion and politics a man’s reasoning powers are not above the monkey’s.”~Mark Twain
“Ocean: A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man - who has no gills.”~ Ambrose Bierce
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03-04-2013, 04:15 PM
RE: Going to visit the USA for the first time!
Scubadiving, ofcourse! Always wanted to do that! Is it available there?

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