Grieving as an atheist
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01-08-2015, 06:17 AM
RE: Grieving as an atheist
I would think it would be easier for a believer with all that "I'll see him in heaven" crap. The atheist view just seems so final. I think it's the only view that makes sense but I could see that there would be a "hope" with religion. It would be a false hope but it looks like it would comfort.

Life's hard. If I had the power I wouldn't make anyone go though the pain of losing a loved one.
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02-08-2015, 07:27 PM
RE: Grieving as an atheist
I have had this twice this year already. First was my grandmother. Her death was the first for me as a complete non believer. I was rather close to her and I was deeply saddened. I remember though the peace I had thinking that she was just gone. She was a pretty hardcore catholic and said several times as she was dying that she just hoped that god would accept her. That made me really sad that this great lady was scared of hell. The other was my dad's best friend Tim who was basically an uncle to me. It gives me no pause or anguish thinking that they are simply gone. In fact, it is less stressful since I don't think there is a heaven or hell to go to. If I were to die, my poor wife will live the rest of her life not knowing my "place." What a wicked thing to do to a person.

"If we are honest—and scientists have to be—we must admit that religion is a jumble of false assertions, with no basis in reality.
The very idea of God is a product of the human imagination."
- Paul Dirac
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02-08-2015, 07:50 PM
RE: Grieving as an atheist
My grandmother was an atheist when I was a believer. I remember asking her where she thought we *go* when we died if she didn't believe in God. Her response: "Into the ground, Jenny." Tongue

My mom on the other hand, was and is, into all the woo. When my Dad passed away, I remember my mom and sister running to a psychic who's whole schtick was to give grieving family members "postcards from heaven" from loved ones who passed on. Even as a Christian, I thought the whole thing sounded nutty--so I didn't go (plus the Bible kind of frowns on those types of things). Shortly after my Dad passed away, I became an atheist--and it was very hard realizing I would never see him again in heaven. The realization of all of this was very hard for me to deal with.

One day I was watching a podcast (I think it might have been the Atheist Experience) and the host was asked by a caller how he felt about there not being any heaven. His Answer: "How can you feel bad about something that never existed in the first place?" Just one simple line really helped free me from my sadness of *no heaven.*
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02-08-2015, 08:24 PM
RE: Grieving as an atheist
(31-07-2015 10:09 PM)Banjo Wrote:  Sadly I have no "wise word" to comfort anyone.

And yet your words comfort me. Each post from you gives me comfort and joy. Smile




#sigh
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02-08-2015, 08:40 PM
RE: Grieving as an atheist
I think there needs to be a special mourning thread. This topic comes up frequently.

Shakespeare's Comedy of Errors.... on Donald J. Trump:

He is deformed, crooked, old, and sere,
Ill-fac’d, worse bodied, shapeless every where;
Vicious, ungentle, foolish, blunt, unkind,
Stigmatical in making, worse in mind.
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02-08-2015, 10:01 PM
RE: Grieving as an atheist
(02-08-2015 07:50 PM)jennybee Wrote:  My grandmother was an atheist when I was a believer. I remember asking her where she thought we *go* when we died if she didn't believe in God. Her response: "Into the ground, Jenny." Tongue

My mom on the other hand, was and is, into all the woo. When my Dad passed away, I remember my mom and sister running to a psychic who's whole schtick was to give grieving family members "postcards from heaven" from loved ones who passed on. Even as a Christian, I thought the whole thing sounded nutty--so I didn't go (plus the Bible kind of frowns on those types of things). Shortly after my Dad passed away, I became an atheist--and it was very hard realizing I would never see him again in heaven. The realization of all of this was very hard for me to deal with.

One day I was watching a podcast (I think it might have been the Atheist Experience) and the host was asked by a caller how he felt about there not being any heaven. His Answer: "How can you feel bad about something that never existed in the first place?" Just one simple line really helped free me from my sadness of *no heaven.*

Religion has always been used as a bulwark against death. Losing one's religion entails facing one's fears, and I don't think that's a bad thing.
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03-08-2015, 04:05 AM
RE: Grieving as an atheist
(02-08-2015 08:24 PM)GirlyMan Wrote:  
(31-07-2015 10:09 PM)Banjo Wrote:  Sadly I have no "wise word" to comfort anyone.

And yet your words comfort me. Each post from you gives me comfort and joy. Smile




Thanks mate. That's such a lovely thing to say. I really appreciate it. Blush

NOTE: Member, Tomasia uses this site to slander other individuals. He then later proclaims it a joke, but not in public.
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Banjo.
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03-08-2015, 08:49 PM
RE: Grieving as an atheist
Heaven may exist but not in the biblical sense. The brain undergoes chemical changes as it's dying and "heaven" may be what the chemicals create for a few brief moments.
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04-08-2015, 05:01 AM
RE: Grieving as an atheist
(03-08-2015 08:49 PM)Takelababy Wrote:  Heaven may exist but not in the biblical sense. The brain undergoes chemical changes as it's dying and "heaven" may be what the chemicals create for a few brief moments.

Doesn't "in the biblical sense" mean sex? So death is sex? (purposely ignoring the 'not')

Alright! Thumbsup

NOTE: Member, Tomasia uses this site to slander other individuals. He then later proclaims it a joke, but not in public.
I will call him a liar and a dog here and now.
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04-08-2015, 06:22 AM
RE: Grieving as an atheist
I lost my grandfather when I was believer (or rather sporadic church goer) and father when I was atheist for quite some time. I noticed no difference in grieving process.

The first revolt is against the supreme tyranny of theology, of the phantom of God. As long as we have a master in heaven, we will be slaves on earth.

Mikhail Bakunin.
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