Groan Worthy Jokes

[WillHopp]

Why did the yogurt go to the art exhibit? Because it was cultured.

[Can_of_Beans]

(30-10-2014 08:26 PM)WillHopp Wrote:  

(29-10-2014 09:52 PM)Can_of_Beans Wrote:  I'll admit to laughing, but...

We have a thread for that

Did I offend a cannibal? Was it offensive that the cannibal ate his girlfriend, which is what cannibals do? Was it because it had the word ass in it that it was offensive? It was certainly groan-worthy. I don't think that joke belongs in the offensive joke thread. Ligthten up Francis.

You're right. Jokes about guys killing and eating their girlfriends, taking a shit and wiping their ass aren't offensive at all. Please accept my apologies. You're clearly a refined gentleman with impeccable taste.

Carry on.

[morondog]

(31-10-2014 08:28 AM)Can_of_Beans Wrote:  You're clearly a refined gentleman with impeccable taste.

... as one cannibal said to another, shortly after having eaten the latter's girlfriend...

[grizzlysnake]

What did the dog say when he dragged his butt on sand paper?

"Ruff"

[grizzlysnake]

What do you call a sleeping bull?
A bull dozer

[WillHopp]

(31-10-2014 08:28 AM)Can_of_Beans Wrote:  

(30-10-2014 08:26 PM)WillHopp Wrote:  Did I offend a cannibal? Was it offensive that the cannibal ate his girlfriend, which is what cannibals do? Was it because it had the word ass in it that it was offensive? It was certainly groan-worthy. I don't think that joke belongs in the offensive joke thread. Ligthten up Francis.

You're right. Jokes about guys killing and eating their girlfriends, taking a shit and wiping their ass aren't offensive at all. Please accept my apologies. You're clearly a refined gentleman with impeccable taste.

Carry on.

Good stuff, but I still stand by my joke as groan-worthy and not offensive.

[The Polyglot Atheist]

1. What do you call the animal that lives 50m underground, is green and eats stones?
The green stone eater.

2. There's a tunnel that crosses the Earth from side to side, what happens if you throw a stone in it? A) The stone crosses the Earth and comes out the other side. B) The stone stops at the middle of the Earth. C) The stone gets to the center of the Earth and comes back.

None of the above. When it reaches 50m, the green stone eater will eat it.

3. How do you put an elephant in the fridge?
You make sure it's empty, then stick the elephant in there.

4. How do you put a giraffe in the fridge?
You take the elephant out and then put the giraffe in.

5. The lion king makes a conference and all the animals gather, except one, who?
The giraffe, because it's in the fridge.

6. A man needs to cross a river full of crocodiles, but there are no bridges and he must swim, what will he do?
He calmly crosses it because the crocodiles are at the lion king conference.

[HU.Junyuan]

I heard the joke about a man trying to rob a bank where FBI agents were in line cashing their pay checks.

Here's a thief who were trying to withdraw money about 20 days ago with the debit card and photo ID that he had stolen at the same counter where the owner were filing an application form of reporting a lost debit card AT THE SAME TIME. The bank teller noticed that it was the same card number under the same owner's name. The thief sensed the tension and tried to run away. The owner caught up with the thief after being alerted by the teller and wrestled him down right behind the bank's entrance.

It can only be destiny,


Top right, owner. Top left thief. Bottom, on the ground, dressed in black, own. Bottom, on the ground, dressed in white, thief.

[Chas]

(01-11-2014 05:45 AM)HU.Junyuan Wrote:  I heard the joke about a man trying to rob a bank where FBI agents were in line cashing their pay checks.

Here's a thief who were trying to withdraw money about 20 days ago with the debit card and photo ID that he had stolen at the same counter where the owner were filing an application form of reporting a lost debit card AT THE SAME TIME. The bank teller noticed that it was the same card number under the same owner's name. The thief sensed the tension and tried to run away. The owner caught up with the thief after being alerted by the teller and wrestled him down right behind the bank's entrance.

It can only be destiny,


Top right, owner. Top left thief. Bottom, on the ground, dressed in black, own. Bottom, on the ground, dressed in white, thief.

You are posting in the wrong thread.

[Can_of_Beans]

What does a nosey pepper do?

Gets jalapeño business.