He boiled for your sins...
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14-11-2013, 03:03 PM
RE: He boiled for your sins...
Hundreds of years from now, when people see thousands of posts about the FSM, they may (somewhat) logically conclude he exists (and is likely delicious and somewhat al dente).

Therefore, I may be compelled to insist that you prove the FSM does NOT exist before I prove Jesus is the God who does exist on some future thread. Watch for it in a pot with garlic and onions near you!
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15-11-2013, 07:22 AM
RE: He boiled for your sins...
... which is very much the point of the FSM and Russels' teapot and the like, PJ: To establish that the burden of proof is on the person making the claim, not on the person refuting the claim.

Give me your argument in the form of a published paper, and then we can start to talk.
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15-11-2013, 09:39 AM
RE: He boiled for your sins...
(09-11-2013 12:55 AM)Raptor Jesus Wrote:  'nuff said...

[Image: adbd161f93ad308ca7293582ff654674402430f2...dcab23.jpg]
With all that suffering, that FSM must have really been steamed! Big Grin

"Religion has caused more misery to all of mankind in every stage of human history than any other single idea." --Madalyn Murray O'Hair
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15-11-2013, 10:51 AM
RE: He boiled for your sins...
Creation

We must teach all sides of the story!
Main article: Creation of the World

[Image: 670px-0,1413,0,900-The_Flying_Spaghetti_Monster.jpg]

Flying Spaghetti Monster created the entire universe and all its contents in just four days, after drinking heavily. The following three days, He rested. On the first day, the Flying Spaghetti Monster separated the water from the heavens; on the second, because he could not tread water for long and had grown tired of flying, he created the land—complemented by a beer volcano. Satisfied, the Flying Spaghetti Monster overindulged in beer from the beer volcano and woke up hungover. Between drunken nights and clumsy afternoons, the Flying Spaghetti Monster produced seas and land (for a second time, accidentally, because he forgot that he created it the day before) along with Heaven and a midget, which he named Man. Man and an equally short woman, and from which all of humanity sprang forth, and lived happily in the Olive Garden of Eden for some time until the Flying Spaghetti Monster caused a global flood in a cooking accident. Of special note are pirates, who are considered holy in Pastafarianism, helping combat global warming, earthquakes, hurricanes, and other natural disasters.

[Image: Wowonearth.png]
Timeline

1/1/5000BFSM- The first day appears. The FSM creates large balls of flaming gas, which accidently leak water creating seas. It was pretty weird for the stars to be immerged in the ocean, so the FSM seperated them and created vast galaxies and cosmic stuff.
• 1/2/5000BFSM- The second day appears. The FSM creates filment, which he renames "Land", since filment-ho! didn't sound as good as land-ho. The FSM creates a volcano that releases beverages and decides to keep it in heaven near the stars instead of the land.
• 1/3/5000BFSM- Somewhere in the Indian Ocean, the FSM was hungover, and forgot what he had created the previous day, so he renamed the land Earth. Then he grew lush jungles of rice, grass, semolia and ferns.
• 1/4/5000BFSM- The FSM created more stars including the sun and moon.
• 1/5/5000BFSM- The Big Bang happened and a tree and mountains and midget were created.


Long ago, His Noodliness decided, in his great wisdom, to make stuff. His first task was easily the most difficult. On the first day, he made a mountain, trees and a "midgit" (sic). The midgit (sic) took the greatest time, as He had to create a small human, having never even created a human before. At the end of that day, it was so, at which point, He spent the next 3 days making everything else, including the first 3-day weekend, the Shroud of Napkin, and fake carbon atoms to fool scientists and geologists. He then rested on the 5th, 6th and 7th days.

He initially created cave men with the intention of making a race that could be looked down upon by humans, but upon offending Him greatly, they were destroyed. He then created the dinosaurs as a companion to man. However, too many pirate ships sank due to the dinosaurs' great size, so they too were destroyed.
[Image: spaghetti-monster-coloring-page-3.gif]
The same happened with the giant sloth and the woolly mammoth. The dodo actually passed the test, but this was the result of a clerical error and was corrected when humans invaded the dodos' abode on an island.

~Ramen

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