Hell is like prison ? (a really dumb analogy ahead)
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07-09-2016, 11:29 PM
Hell is like prison ? (a really dumb analogy ahead)
There is a certain analogy i have heard fundies use in at least two debates i have had with fundies one being a street preacher the other being online .The goal of this analogy is to justify the concept of hell and damnation it goes like this. (get out you anti nausea medicine now)

"hell is like prison and gods judgement is like court judgement "

Now you may cease your face palming and moans of agony from the sheer amount of stupid you have just struck with and let's move to the counter.

The most obvious differences is

Hell- a lake of fire where one is cast for eternity without any redeeming considerations forever without the possibility of reprieve or even an end to your agony.

Jail -at least in north america while not pleasant is not a lake of fire where you are cast for all eternity. Judges take into consideration circumstances of both crime and conviction etc. And there are multiple opportunities to become a productive member of society again. And even the death penalty at least is an escape from imprisonment thus temporary.

The difference is stark and i'm not even going to get into how Christianities ideas of justice directly clash with the modern legal system. If anyone has thoughts on that post away.

Note -some Christians try an justify eternal torment by claiming that it's punishment for breaking an eternal law. This is retarded because we judge most laws by victims effected. (there are very few truly victim less crimes) But god can't be a crime victim because there is nothing god can lose or no state were he can be harmed so this argument fails.

Note- even if we grant the prison analogy it doesn't answer a larger question why should we care about gods laws. To work within the analogy in human courts people have and are punished unfairly and laws can be unjust so this doesn't actually justify gods laws or the punishment of hell .

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08-09-2016, 01:37 AM (This post was last modified: 08-09-2016 02:29 AM by EvolutionKills.)
RE: Hell is like prison ? (a really dumb analogy ahead)
We are finite beings of finite means and resources, and even at our worst, are only capable of causing a finite amount of suffering to others. Even at an 'eye for an eye' level of reciprocity, it is impossible for any human to qualify for an eternal punishment.

Now what do we call it when a punishment fits the crime? That's justice. What do we call it when a punishment is less severe than the crime otherwise warrants? We call that mercy. What do we call it when the punishment is far harsher than the crime warrants? We call that injustice.

Eternal punishment for finite crimes is the epitome of injustice; I literally cannot think of a better example.


Even if they want to try to cop out to either god or his law being eternal, that's still bullshit. Even by their own standards, we're incapable of causing harm to their god. If we could harm him, he wouldn't be much of a god, now would he?

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08-09-2016, 05:25 AM
RE: Hell is like prison ? (a really dumb analogy ahead)
(08-09-2016 01:37 AM)EvolutionKills Wrote:  We are finite beings of finite means and resources, and even at our worst, are only capable of causing a finite amount of suffering to others. Even at an 'eye for an eye' level of reciprocity, it is impossible for any human to qualify for an eternal punishment.

Now what do we call it when a punishment fits the crime? That's justice. What do we call it when a punishment is less severe than the crime otherwise warrants? We call that mercy. What do we call it when the punishment is far harsher than the crime warrants? We call that injustice.

Eternal punishment for finite crimes is the epitome of injustice; I literally cannot think of a better example.


Even if they want to try to cop out to either god or his law being eternal, that's still bullshit. Even by their own standards, we're incapable of causing harm to their god. If we could harm him, he wouldn't be much of a god, now would he?

Yep! An admission that god is harmed or affected in any way by a finite being brings their god down to human level. Very not-omnipotent.

The very idea of salvation puts all kinds of limits on their god, their god can't even demonstrate simple forgiveness, something that even a child can do. Facepalm

And even if you obey all of the rules, their god created a kludge that can't even save everyone, it only applies to a fraction of the population.

To believe in the jeebus version of god, is to believe in a severely limited god that can't even save most of the people that it condemned.

Christian salvation comes off as a petulant child screaming threats against people for not believing in the big bad wolf.

Gods derive their power from post-hoc rationalizations. -The Inquisition

Using the supernatural to explain events in your life is a failure of the intellect to comprehend the world around you. -The Inquisition
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08-09-2016, 11:39 AM
RE: Hell is like prison ? (a really dumb analogy ahead)
I had this same thought when debating the subject of "God's Perfect Justice" with Alla, who postulated (as I've heard before, many times) that our "sins" are a "debt" we owe to the Creator for not being obedient to the laws that humans wrote down on God's behalf.

I pulled a Bill Hicks: "Well then, forgive me."

All joking aside, though... why is this god of theirs so helpless in the face of a concept of sin that god invented in the first place?

"I want to forgive you guys for this stuff I made up, I really do... but I just can't. You understand, I'm sure. Off to the burning fire pit for you all!" Rolleyes

I cannot think of a deity that is more clearly man-made, except for the highly capricious Greek ones, with whom Jehovah shares many similarities. I cannot think of a "debt" against the eternal creator of the universe that is more silly than "Sorry, you acted like your ape cousins and did the nasty sexy-sex in a way that isn't going to produce offspring! Off to the burning pit for you! No forgiveness is possible from me unless we murder an animal in a blood-ritual, or substitute my half-human/half-me 'son' as an alternate blood ritual. Why is it a sin? Because I say so. No, I can't just snap my fingers and forgive your sins because I say so... what, do you think I have a big red forgiveness button up here?"

It begs the question of why John Oliver is more powerful than this god...




"Theology made no provision for evolution. The biblical authors had missed the most important revelation of all! Could it be that they were not really privy to the thoughts of God?" - E. O. Wilson
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08-09-2016, 12:54 PM
RE: Hell is like prison ? (a really dumb analogy ahead)
Hell is more like a GULag. You could be sent there for pretty much everything.

Seriously though this analogy is idiotic.

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08-09-2016, 01:11 PM
RE: Hell is like prison ? (a really dumb analogy ahead)
My headteacher in primary school had a strange analogy of heaven/hell. I don't know if he got it from elsewhere.

He stated that heaven and hell are both like prisons. in the middle of the prison hall is a large dining table full of beautiful food. In heaven and in hell everyone has long sticks stuck to their arms with knives and forks on the end. They can put their arms through the bars to reach the food.

The difference is in heaven the people use their knives and forks in order to pass the food to the person in the opposite cell. In contrast, in hell every person is stuck in an eternity of trying to feed themselves which is physically impossible with said cutlery. lol.

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08-09-2016, 02:20 PM
RE: Hell is like prison ? (a really dumb analogy ahead)
It's certainly a terrible analogy in regards to the whole Jesus thing since he's supposedly been punished for you. It really shouldn't matter what crime you committed he already took the punishment so you can go to Heaven, right?

What punishment you may ask? Well being tortured and nailed to a cross to die...and then come back 3 days later and go to Heaven to rule as a king forever. He didn't go to Hell for you, actually you may still go there..so his death meant nothing actually.

You still gotta repent and may even face Earthly justice by going to a man made prison. You have to bend the knee and accept the sacrifice of Jesus which wasn't really a sacrifice at all, he's living it up in Heaven right now.

No judge would allow an innocent to take the punishment of a criminal deemed guilty beyond any doubt, it's just wrong. But then you add on the whole concept of never ending torture and pain as the punishment...and this person who was supposed to take your place only does so for 3 days (Did Jesus even go the Hell?)...and he wasn't even human but a god man who could perform magic tricks... and then you still have to go be tortured if you don't ask for forgiveness and admit you're a flawed broken person from birth...and even if you go to Heaven you might not like it there and you'll have your mind wiped of personality because no one can sin there and just thinking about sex is a sin so apparently no sex either....ugh I'm getting a headache.

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08-09-2016, 04:14 PM
RE: Hell is like prison ? (a really dumb analogy ahead)
(08-09-2016 01:11 PM)SunnyD1 Wrote:  My headteacher in primary school had a strange analogy of heaven/hell. I don't know if he got it from elsewhere.

He stated that heaven and hell are both like prisons. in the middle of the prison hall is a large dining table full of beautiful food. In heaven and in hell everyone has long sticks stuck to their arms with knives and forks on the end. They can put their arms through the bars to reach the food.

The difference is in heaven the people use their knives and forks in order to pass the food to the person in the opposite cell. In contrast, in hell every person is stuck in an eternity of trying to feed themselves which is physically impossible with said cutlery. lol.

That is a very weird notion

Also really really sadistic like almost saw level sadistic

It also makes little sense as it's saying people regardless of heaven or hell are assholes as both are selfish one group tries to feed themselves the others only work together for the selfish desire to eat

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08-09-2016, 05:05 PM
RE: Hell is like prison ? (a really dumb analogy ahead)
(08-09-2016 01:11 PM)SunnyD1 Wrote:  My headteacher in primary school had a strange analogy of heaven/hell. I don't know if he got it from elsewhere.

He stated that heaven and hell are both like prisons. in the middle of the prison hall is a large dining table full of beautiful food. In heaven and in hell everyone has long sticks stuck to their arms with knives and forks on the end. They can put their arms through the bars to reach the food.

The difference is in heaven the people use their knives and forks in order to pass the food to the person in the opposite cell. In contrast, in hell every person is stuck in an eternity of trying to feed themselves which is physically impossible with said cutlery. lol.

Sounds like he was ripping off the myth of Tantalus.

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08-09-2016, 07:01 PM
RE: Hell is like prison ? (a really dumb analogy ahead)
(08-09-2016 01:11 PM)SunnyD1 Wrote:  My headteacher in primary school had a strange analogy of heaven/hell. I don't know if he got it from elsewhere.

He stated that heaven and hell are both like prisons. in the middle of the prison hall is a large dining table full of beautiful food. In heaven and in hell everyone has long sticks stuck to their arms with knives and forks on the end. They can put their arms through the bars to reach the food.

The difference is in heaven the people use their knives and forks in order to pass the food to the person in the opposite cell. In contrast, in hell every person is stuck in an eternity of trying to feed themselves which is physically impossible with said cutlery. lol.

So only the criminally stupid go to hell?

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