Help lifting my grandmother's spirits
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30-08-2014, 10:07 PM
RE: Help lifting my grandmother's spirits
(30-08-2014 09:59 PM)Smercury44 Wrote:  Got her all settled in to the nursing home today. It's really nice where she's at, and the nurses seem great, and her physical therapist is awesome!

But - I need to vent for a moment, forgive me. My sister hasn't visited or spoken to my grandma since the accident, and called me tonight to tell me she is visiting her tomorrow, and bringing a care package, and that I might want to buy her one also so that I don't look like "the bad granddaughter"

I could punch her in the face Angry Dodgy *deep breaths*

There's usually one in every family - let it go and focus and your grandmother - you can deal with your sister later.

My brother got on my every nerve when dad was sick - he went full asshole.

See here they are the bruises some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF
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31-08-2014, 05:31 AM
RE: Help lifting my grandmother's spirits
Does your grandmother have all those end of life things squared away?
Final health instructions, funeral plans, wills, accounts, noted who gets what special item ?

If she is going to leave property or banks accounts to one person, make life easy and add that person as a joint owner now. So much stuff is easier to handle if you handle it while grandma is alive and sound then when she isn't. Been dealing with my parents estates - they weren't wealthy- but owned a couple pieces of property, had some banks accounts, insurance etc- some of it was just a hassle- so do what you can now.


"Life is a daring adventure or it is nothing"--Helen Keller
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31-08-2014, 07:51 PM
RE: Help lifting my grandmother's spirits
(30-08-2014 10:07 PM)Anjele Wrote:  
(30-08-2014 09:59 PM)Smercury44 Wrote:  Got her all settled in to the nursing home today. It's really nice where she's at, and the nurses seem great, and her physical therapist is awesome!

But - I need to vent for a moment, forgive me. My sister hasn't visited or spoken to my grandma since the accident, and called me tonight to tell me she is visiting her tomorrow, and bringing a care package, and that I might want to buy her one also so that I don't look like "the bad granddaughter"

I could punch her in the face Angry Dodgy *deep breaths*

There's usually one in every family - let it go and focus and your grandmother - you can deal with your sister later.

My brother got on my every nerve when dad was sick - he went full asshole.

My former sibling only showed up at the very end. The night before Mom passed he spent rifling through her papers, looking for the goodies. [He couldn't get to them. <snort>]

Mom left me with instructions that she did NOT want to be prayed over. I told the asswipe that he could keep it to himself or I'd staple his lips together. Big Grin I really enjoyed saying that.

How's your grandmother doing, Smerc? Keep us up to date!

We have enough youth. How about looking for the Fountain of Smart?
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31-08-2014, 11:11 PM
RE: Help lifting my grandmother's spirits
Quote:Help lifting my grandmother's spirits

Don't be surprised - or blame yourself - if you cannot. A hip fracture is a serious injury at her age and she has to know what she is up against. Hospitals are not known for their ambiance and rehab facilities are not much better.

http://www.cdc.gov/homeandrecreationalsa...hipfx.html

Did they do surgery? Implant a rod? Are they talking about acute or sub-acute rehab?

Atheism is NOT a Religion. It's A Personal Relationship With Reality!
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01-09-2014, 02:25 AM
RE: Help lifting my grandmother's spirits
Hugs to you and your grandmother. You're great granddaughter, you are Hug
Heart

Humankind Dodgy (a total misnomer)
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02-09-2014, 03:16 PM
RE: Help lifting my grandmother's spirits
Thanks for keeping an eye on me and checking in folks! Big Grin Hug Heart

Went down for a visit today, I got to be there while she had an occupational therapy interview. They seem pretty insistent that they are going to get her back to independent. She did everything for herself before the accident, and that's where they want her to be when she leaves. It all sounded pretty good.

Unfortunately she's still not hungry, every time she tries to eat she says it feels like it's going to come right back up. She is mostly drinking ensure, and having the occasional yogurt. She knows she isn't going to have much physical strength until she does eat, so she is trying. She was really down in the dumps today though Sad

Made me a little nervous, she had a cut on her arm, didn't really tell my mom how it happened, and the OT nurse asked about it while she was there, and my grandma just kept looking at me like she didn't want to say... Then later she said something to me like... You have to be careful about what you say around here... Undecided

BnA we do have all that end of life stuff squared away. My dad has filed the power of attorney, I think they're all set there.

Just trying to be there for her as much as I can now.

Thanks again for all the support everyone Hug

I hope that the world turns, and things get better. But what I hope most of all is that you understand what I mean when I tell you that, even though I do not know you, and even though I may never meet you, laugh with you, cry with you, or kiss you, I love you. With all my heart, I love you. - V for Vendetta
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02-09-2014, 04:53 PM
RE: Help lifting my grandmother's spirits
Old people get skin tears very easily, because their skin can get really thin.

Try to be there at different times of day, even early morning because the way things work can change from shift to shift.

In the places I have worked, the ones who work day shift, are in speed mode in the morning. Each aide will have a set number of patients that they have to get up, dressed, fed, off to rehab, help each other lift the big ones, etc. Sadly, in many places they are loaded with too many patients. While most I have known try to be polite and nice, they probably seem abrupt and rushed than most old folks care for. No time to dilly dally because call lights are ringing too.

It can be a very hard adjustment.

Then things quiet down till dinner time, then they start loading people back into bed right after dinner till about 8 pm.

And they are rotated thru the shower, which is never,ever fun. It's freezing, the patient feels vulnerable. It just sucks.


"Life is a daring adventure or it is nothing"--Helen Keller
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02-09-2014, 05:18 PM
RE: Help lifting my grandmother's spirits
I worked in Canadian nursing homes where the standard of care is high. My step mother is in a very nice one and the staff are great. It so saddens me to hear of people who get lesser care than they deserve. I treated all my patients with the care I'd give if they were my grandparents.
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04-09-2014, 07:20 AM
RE: Help lifting my grandmother's spirits
It galls me the way seniors are treated in general. I've seen so many times that the slightest health scare brings out the vultures. Things go missing, money is "borrowed," people are treated well for a few days until they recover. Then everybody put them back on Ignore. And it's not always just relatives. It disgusts me.

We have enough youth. How about looking for the Fountain of Smart?
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04-09-2014, 08:05 AM
RE: Help lifting my grandmother's spirits
(02-09-2014 03:16 PM)Smercury44 Wrote:  Thanks for keeping an eye on me and checking in folks! Big Grin Hug Heart

Went down for a visit today, I got to be there while she had an occupational therapy interview. They seem pretty insistent that they are going to get her back to independent. She did everything for herself before the accident, and that's where they want her to be when she leaves. It all sounded pretty good.

Unfortunately she's still not hungry, every time she tries to eat she says it feels like it's going to come right back up. She is mostly drinking ensure, and having the occasional yogurt. She knows she isn't going to have much physical strength until she does eat, so she is trying. She was really down in the dumps today though Sad

Made me a little nervous, she had a cut on her arm, didn't really tell my mom how it happened, and the OT nurse asked about it while she was there, and my grandma just kept looking at me like she didn't want to say... Then later she said something to me like... You have to be careful about what you say around here... Undecided

BnA we do have all that end of life stuff squared away. My dad has filed the power of attorney, I think they're all set there.

Just trying to be there for her as much as I can now.

Thanks again for all the support everyone Hug

Ensure can do wonders, just make sure she drinks as much as possible. I have seen people have wonderful come backs with lots of ensure as the only food.

This is the typical situation where cannabis is exceptionally helpful without fail - nausea. Not sure if you would be able to get her some, the sublingual drops are best but don't try to put it under the tongue, that often starts gagging in people with nausea. Put enough in a shot glass to wet the mouth but not enough to swallow.

Yes, older people's skin does break easily, but there is no reason for it in a hospital setting...

If you can manage at all to bring her back home and have her get care there instead of a strange place - it would do total wonders for her mood and recovery. Motivation goes away in strange settings. A young person will try to get the heck outta there - an old one will sink into depression, thinking they will never get out.

[Image: dobie.png]Science is the process we've designed to be responsible for generating our best guess as to what the fuck is going on. Girly Man
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