Holy foreskin!
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03-08-2016, 09:10 AM
RE: Holy foreskin!
(03-08-2016 08:55 AM)SYZ Wrote:  Totally off-topic...

How do you circumcise a whale?

— sɹǝʌıp uıʞs ɹnoɟ uʍop puǝs

Boom, tish...

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03-08-2016, 02:29 PM
RE: Holy foreskin!
One of my favorite topics. I have written about this extensively here.

Basically, after he was circumcised. Jesus's foreskin landed in the hands of a Hebrew nurse, who placed it in an alabaster jar of spikenard and passed it on to her son. The son, an apothecary, sold it to Mary Magdalene, who used the perfume to anoint Jesus's feet.

The foreskin was then lost for a while, before being delivered to the emperor Charlemagne by an angel. He gave it to Pope Leo as a present. The pope dickered with it before it finally found a resting place In Calcata, Italy. It was stolen in 1983 (supposedly by the Vatican itself, to prevent further worship of the object).

Doc
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03-08-2016, 02:45 PM
RE: Holy foreskin!
Since it's the flesh of Jesus, doesn't that mean it can be eaten?

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03-08-2016, 02:49 PM
RE: Holy foreskin!
Let's clone the fucker - and see if he can walk on water...

Betcha he can't..

Big Grin

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The difference between prayer and masturbation - is when a guy is through masturbating - he has something to show for his efforts.
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03-08-2016, 04:02 PM
RE: Holy foreskin!
(03-08-2016 02:29 PM)docskeptic Wrote:  [...] The foreskin was then lost for a while, before being delivered to the emperor Charlemagne by an angel. He gave it to Pope Leo as a present. The pope dickered with it before it finally found a resting place In Calcata, Italy. It was stolen in 1983 (supposedly by the Vatican itself, to prevent further worship of the object).

Doc

Uh... I thought it'd been made into a small lampshade? Or am I getting my loonies mixed up? Tongue

I'm a creationist... I believe that man created God.
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03-08-2016, 04:13 PM (This post was last modified: 03-08-2016 04:20 PM by Bucky Ball.)
RE: Holy foreskin!
(03-08-2016 04:02 PM)SYZ Wrote:  
(03-08-2016 02:29 PM)docskeptic Wrote:  [...] The foreskin was then lost for a while, before being delivered to the emperor Charlemagne by an angel. He gave it to Pope Leo as a present. The pope dickered with it before it finally found a resting place In Calcata, Italy. It was stolen in 1983 (supposedly by the Vatican itself, to prevent further worship of the object).

Doc

Uh... I thought it'd been made into a small lampshade? Or am I getting my loonies mixed up? Tongue

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ed_Gein
Billions of Catholics eat him every week. I wonder if it grew back at the resurrection ?
Not to worry. Somebody figured it all out.
https://thelastyearofearthlythings.wordp...-genitals/
Weeping

Insufferable know-it-all.Einstein God has a plan for us. Please stop screwing it up with your prayers.
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03-08-2016, 04:18 PM
RE: Holy foreskin!
Is that what they think the cracker becomes during transubstantiation. Might be okay if you deep-fried it like a pork rind.

There is only one really serious philosophical question, and that is suicide. -Camus
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03-08-2016, 04:24 PM
RE: Holy foreskin!
(03-08-2016 04:13 PM)Bucky Ball Wrote:  Billions of Catholics eat him every week. I wonder if it grew back at the resurrection?

I guess it beats Mark 8:19... "When I broke the five loaves for the five thousand, how many basketfuls of broken pieces did you collect?" "Twelve," they answered.

Apparently they were each also issued with tweezers and a magnifying glass. Tongue

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03-08-2016, 05:18 PM
RE: Holy foreskin!
(03-08-2016 02:29 PM)docskeptic Wrote:  One of my favorite topics. I have written about this extensively here.

Basically, after he was circumcised. Jesus's foreskin landed in the hands of a Hebrew nurse, who placed it in an alabaster jar of spikenard and passed it on to her son. The son, an apothecary, sold it to Mary Magdalene, who used the perfume to anoint Jesus's feet.

The foreskin was then lost for a while, before being delivered to the emperor Charlemagne by an angel. He gave it to Pope Leo as a present. The pope dickered with it before it finally found a resting place In Calcata, Italy. It was stolen in 1983 (supposedly by the Vatican itself, to prevent further worship of the object).

Doc

Why do all my skeptical hairs stand on end when I read that? Consider

Skepticism is not a position; it is an approach to claims.
Science is not a subject, but a method.
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03-08-2016, 06:14 PM
RE: Holy foreskin!
(02-08-2016 06:27 PM)Reltzik Wrote:  I STILL do not comprehend the obsession of the Abrahamic religion with foreskins.

Whenever I read any thing I put in the word foreskin whenever I run across a word with fore in it, whether it is forearm, forehead forward or whatever. KInda a fun game for me.
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