Horrible Poems Thread
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07-05-2017, 08:59 AM
RE: Horrible Poems Thread
(07-05-2017 08:18 AM)adey67 Wrote:  There was a young lady called Jenny
Who ate tofu while sat on the floor
But what's more revealing
And very appealing
Is the fact she's a latte whore. Tongue

I do drink a lot of lattes and my daily habit does tend to wreak havoc on my bank account, but I don't think the little old Christian lady that works at the Starbucks drive thru would appreciate me propositioning her for a Venti latte and a bagel. Tongue Laugh out load

"Let the waters settle and you will see the moon and stars mirrored in your own being." -Rumi
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19-10-2017, 07:09 AM
RE: Horrible Poems Thread
All Hallows' Eve

Halloween is upon us
The time draws nigh
with goblins and witches
and a full moon in the sky.

A pumpkin for carving
with seeds leftover for roasting
One thing I can cook well
and that's not me boasting

I shall be dressed as Wednesday Addams
during this 'ween's party
thanks to TTA
who's votes were hardy

Trick or treat
Justin's Dark Chocolate Peanut Butter Cups
and a Halloween aperitif
Hark, doorbell rings

With kids dressed as ghosts
Boo!
How cute in their costumes
but they're taking all my dark choco peanut butter cups

And I will have no choco cups for eating during the witching hour
Alas, me thinks I shall purchase extra
because I'm cool like that
and I plan to devour

Night of the Living Dead
hot on the screen
Zombies a'plenty
My time of year indeed

So Happy Season of Halloween to all!
I hope you enjoy your eve
with skeletons and zombies
and candy til' you heave!

"Let the waters settle and you will see the moon and stars mirrored in your own being." -Rumi
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19-10-2017, 07:38 AM
RE: Horrible Poems Thread
On Halloween a goblin sucked on my dick,
Leaving slime on my balls
And me feeling sick.
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21-10-2017, 11:31 AM
RE: Horrible Poems Thread
There was a young girl from Darjeeling
Who's cunt was mighty appealing
She lay on her back
Opened her crack
And pissed all over the ceiling.
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21-10-2017, 02:30 PM
RE: Horrible Poems Thread
I eat my peas with honey
I've done so all my life
It makes the peas taste funny
But it sticks them to my knife

What do you mean Life is short. It's the longest thing you're going to do.
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21-10-2017, 07:42 PM
RE: Horrible Poems Thread
There once was a lady named Alice
Who used C4 for a phallus.
They found her vagina
In South Carolina.
And parts of her anus near Dallas.
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22-10-2017, 03:34 AM
RE: Horrible Poems Thread
There was a young man called Eagle
Who's thoughts today can't be legal
Evolution is wrong
He was told by a dong
Cos a Finch can't give birth to a Seagull.

Get your own bleeding hymn book
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22-10-2017, 05:47 AM
RE: Horrible Poems Thread
Roses are red
I want a divorce ಠ_ಠ

If we came from dust, then why is there still dust?
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22-10-2017, 06:36 AM
RE: Horrible Poems Thread
Whales have calves,
Cats have kittens,
Bears have cubs,
Bats have bittens,
Swans have cygnets,
Seals have puppies,
But guppies just have little guppies.

—O. Nash

I'm a creationist... I believe that man created God.
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22-10-2017, 07:40 AM
RE: Horrible Poems Thread
HALLOWEEN ORGY.

I've let a goblin lick my dick,
And sucked an ugly warlocks prick
I've flipped a witch onto her back
And gazed upon her rancid crack,
I've even screwed the heavenly host,
Then took a break for tea and toast,
Before I fucked the holy ghost.
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